Skorian said:
Some day you may find yourself in a situation where you see a conflict between giving people what they want and what they need. Do you give a drug user a needle or do you make them face their ****?
I've actually had to deal with this. And this is a great example of how you are exactly wrong.
The best answer is neither: you remove them from the situation.
You take them from any contact and possibility of getting access to the drug, while providing them with alternate means of dealing with the root cause that made them have to rely on drugs as an avoidance mechanic, recognizing that addiction can be itself a symptom. They cannot be trusted to use their correct judgment.
So what you are saying is that emotionally dependent people need to be isolated and removed from society? Need to be put in solitary confinement? There is no chance they can make the correct choice? This is your reasoning. This is of course why psych wards operate as they do and are hundreds of times more damaging to people then this thread is. Sorry for setting you up with the drugs bit.
You do not yell at them and tell them that they suck: you cause pain and they will immediately return to using the same avoidance mechanism of psychoactive drugs.
Who is yelling? I am saying the certain behaviors suck. And explaining why. That is the point.
You certainly must never yell at them and have no method of enforcing separation; you will have both reinforced how powerless you are and essentially encouraged them to continue their self-destructive behavior.
Fundamental to this is understanding their use from their perspective, not from your own. You might feel all high and mighty about how awesome you are, but if you're looking to help someone, its not about you; its about them.
Who feels high and mighty?
Skorian said:
There are days that I wish telepathy was a real possibility. All language is so flawed. It is arguable that true communication is impossible.
This has nothing to do with telepathy and everything to do with a fundamental failing in your approach. You blam us marketers for being manipulative, but really, we just understand that fundamental facet of communication. Present it from the perspective of the people you are trying to communicate to.
These two don't belong together or in this thread. You are darn straight I don't like alot of marketing.... It is targeted to prey upon peoples weaknesses, but that is not for this thread and an issue we totally disagree on. I also think it is sick in an overweight society to put junk food as impulse items in the checkout lanes.
Skorian said:
I don't know what else I could add to this thread that would be of value. Mostly I have repeated a few basic concepts over and over to the point of absurdity. Repetition can help communicate something sometimes, but it is a pain in the butt for me.
Repetition by itself does not provide clear understanding.
That is why I don't say the "exact" same thing the exact same way. Ya, know.
Constantly repeating
ohayo gozaimasu to you will not make you realize that I am saying good morning to you if you have no understanding of Japanese; you might deduce I am greeting you, but no fine comprehension is possible through simple repetition.
This is actually wrong as some people do learn this way, though it is hard. It is called associating words to an event. It is how babies learn.
Skorian said:
Maybe this is my attempt at redemption for forsaking my father. I disowned the man. [/b]
We all have crosses to bear. This doesn't mean that our specific obsession is universally valid at all. And while we like to think of ourselves as having been wiser and more weathered for it all, really, it can mean that we're just more flawed and suffer from more tunnel vision.
I am not even sure I would call it a cross. I might be on the other side of that, whatever that is called. Indifferent for the most part. I am more disturbed by my indifference. What I sometimes wonder is, am I indifferent to him or myself? Seems like the answer is myself.
Anyway, the rest of your comment is flawed. You have nicely side stepped the main few things I stated. I imagine that it is hard to argue against people taking personal responsibility.....