I'm nine years older since I posted this thread and have realised the error of my ways. I no longer erect a protective psychological barrier against phony people, I grow high hedges and build walls with real bricks and mortar. Ask my phony neighbours.
I thought this was some awful necrobumped thread.
I read through your original post, then realize, it was from 2013, and my thoughts ran wild with how different things were then.
It was nice to see you were the one that came back to revive your thread.
It's a weird thing to ponder for me. For the vast majority of my life, I was always a very ghostly type of person. People didn't really take notice of me, except on a wild occasion; and when they did, they were always amazed. They were amazed, because I was always quiet and out of focus, and then my insight would come flashing through unexpectedly, and I would, 'wow,' people. It was always such a good feeling; but, people still kept their distance. Most people don't like to explore the depths, they are surface dwellers.
Since about 2015ish 2016ish, things changed. I was no longer the, 'likeable,' person. Since then, mostly, people seem to be indifferent, 'at best,' and at worst, are antagonistic towards me, to varying degrees.
I know I changed in some unfortunate ways; but, I have a theory that, a lot of it isn't me, it's my
environment.
Take for example, a case of invasive species. You have some insect or creature of some kind, with all these maxed out stats, so that it can survive in a harsh environment. Then, due to man-made causes, they get transplanted somewhere else, and they just decimate local populations and breed in vast numbers, because they have no competition.
Well, I think my case is the opposite of that. I did actually physically relocate, before things changed for me; but, I lived as a hermit for many years, so, I was largely protected from the changes in environment. I would also later went through some unfavorable conditions, in the new environment, that changed my psyche.
To put all that to rest, my point is that, I think for whatever reason, people literally get
stuck, in an environment that is antagonistic to them. And I think a lot of the time, they are either forced to stay there, due to circumstances, and/or, they don't even realize, things are different in other places.
It could be the people, and the types of people, it could be the geography and general sentiments influencing people. It could be the routines and habits. I mean, it literally could be anything; but, the point is, it's a mismatch between YOUR internals, and the EXTERNALS you inhabit.
So, I really do believe, it some times can be
purely, nothing more, than physical location, and social climate. However, I think the real kicker, is that it's probably, more often than not,
circumstance, that prevents us from finding a remedy.
Circumstance can keep us lost for so long we no longer remember that we were lost, so we stop looking.
Circumstance can erode us, to our core, even break us.
Circumstance can limit our perception and knowledge (ie: not knowing things would be different, if only we could change the circumstance).
And the worst of all is that, some times circumstance is the very thing that limits us, from changing our circumstance; and that can manifest in all sorts of way.
Lately though I've been reminded, by myself, of the concept of mind over mind. That old adage, where there is a will, there is a way. And I've forgotten over the years, how truly powerful the mind is.
So, lately, I too, am very fed up with people. I'm tired of them treating me like I'm a weirdo. I'm tired of them stepping on my toes or being antagonistic, or judging me, or giving me a hard time because clearly I don't have it bad enough.
I am really tired of people. So, I've become misanthropic; though, I don't have a huge affinity for the word or the label.
I can't even imagine, what it would be like to have compassion, patience, and
understanding, from the people, my circumstances present to me, anymore...
But, I remember what it was like for me to have compassion and understanding of others. And I remember what it was like, to not ruminate so much, and also, to be treated well, more often than not.
I remember what it was like for things to just be kind or normal, and the worst of life, was just the relatively normal ups and downs. I remember what it was like to have my life be an exciting drama, filled with people, and sort of have a story to follow along.
So, I think it's circumstantial, and part of the circumstance is physical location, part of it is, where my life is at now, and part of it is social climate, on the town, city, state, nation, and even global scale.
It really is absolutely astonishing if you think about. Authoritarian leaders, the world over, are cropping up like ugly mushrooms and infecting everyone.
What's happening now is _REAL_ There is Deuterte in the Phillipines. There is that crazy guy in Brazil I think it is? Putin, Xi, etc..
Authoritarianism is on the rise; and it doesn't compromise, it's intolerant, it doesn't understand anyone, much less itself. It wants power, and control, and it's fueled by anger, despair, outrage, and it's roots, are in fear...
I'm scared too; but somehow, very few people seem to notice what is going on...
So as EveWasFramed said long ago, that maybe it's your perception. It's not, it's real. But it's our perception, as always, that offers the way out. Mind over mind.
