Mail Order Brides

[Electric_Fusilier]

When I worked in a photo-processing shop, there was this older guy used to come in with his very young Russian wife, and I'm pretty sure the setup was one of those 'mail-order' things. She was always very quiet, quite sad-looking - I felt a bit sorry for her. He was a bombastic sod and an oaf, loud and unattractive, who clearly had nothing more on his mind with her than the fact that she could be a baby-producing machine. If you think I'm being judgemental, then it is at least based on a conversation he had with me when he came into shop one time without her, and proceeded to explain his dissatifaction to me regarding her apparent inability to produce milk for their new baby. Seriously, this **** did not seem to be talking about a human being he was supposed to love and care for (frankly, he shouldn't have been talking about such personal stuff to a stranger like me anyway); rather he came across as a vending-machine techician bitching about a new model that doesn't work properly.


I actually saw her a few months later, walking her baby out in a pushchair. Can't recall if she still seemed sad. I guess it was her choice, and she had to take the consequences. I hope she's okay, though.

 

[suckaG]

We're talking people, here, not boxes of cereal.

good point! but then it brings to mind the question of whether they throw in a bonus box of cereal if you purchase three mail-order brides?




but yeah, on a more serious note, I think there can be a distinction between human trafficking/prostitution and foreign marriage/hook-up gambits. people probably end up getting scammed in ether one though.

better to just purchase one's bride the old fashioned way; a dowry to the father!

 

[EveWasFramed]

better to just purchase one's bride the old fashioned way; a dowry to the father!

Actually, if I'm not mistaken, you have that backward. The bride's father paid the groom to take the bride. lol The dowry was what the GROOM received from the father or the bride.
Anyone more versed in history, please feel free to correct me.:club:

 

[Badjedidude]

Actually, if I'm not mistaken, you have that backward. The bride's father paid the groom to take the bride. Toungue lol The dowry was what the GROOM received from the father or the bride.

You're correct, Eve.

People generally have the idea of a dowry backwards for some reason. It's probably due to all the perceived fantasy romance of the medieval ages. Many people today think that the groom would have to pay for the honor of being allowed to marry the bride, a priceless virgin of a chaste, lovely woman.

But that's pretty far from the truth. In reality, women were not valued nearly as much as men. Girl children were unwanted, as men wanted sons to pass on the family line. And women generally weren't seen as being capable of the same physical labor or worth as men, so they were usually seen as useless, i.e., "return to your embroidery."

So a father who actually had a daughter would have to pay the GROOM a bribe (dowry) to take his daughter on as an added expense and a burden to him. It's only in modern times that the idea of a dowry has somehow switched the over way around. Historically speaking, Eve is correct.

...Just a nice little history lesson from a history teacha.

 

[suckaG]

ohhh yeahhh! hahaha.

thanks for the clarification guys!

ok, so fine. I'm back to mail ordering brides in bulk.

 

[Just_Some_Dude]

i met a real life mail order russian bride at a customer's house here.

it was absolutely hilarious.

she came up and was talking to me...

i was like 'are you.... .... russian?"

she said "hyes"

 

[Vic Sage]

i met a real life mail order russian bride at a customer's house here.

it was absolutely hilarious.

she came up and was talking to me...

i was like 'are you.... .... russian?"

she said "hyes"

What'd the dude look like? Old? Nerdy? Ruggedly handsome?

 

[Just_Some_Dude]

i met a real life mail order russian bride at a customer's house here.

it was absolutely hilarious.

she came up and was talking to me...

i was like 'are you.... .... russian?"

she said "hyes"

What'd the dude look like? Old? Nerdy? Ruggedly handsome?

typical old, fat, rich, white guy, not ugly, just normal. had the **** cheney vibe going. but his personality, you could tell he didn't want to negotiate, he wanted to say what was what and when was when. this girl was cool as **** too. although probably an assassin or spy.

 

[suckaG]

^^^^ we can only hope she was a highly skilled assassin, spying for Medvedev/Putin's inner cirlce on this **** cheney character. maybe he is a shady business mogul who owes the Russian Federation money from the early days of the 90's economic scramble...

Trotsky's ghost only knows!

 

[rayousha]

Wow this one is a very hot topic

I’ll put in my 2 cents since I come from one of the countries that have long been associated with mail-order-brides (Philippines). I think it was really popular in the 70s & 80s since having a “white husband” was a social status for the families back home. I guess that came about for being colonized by the Americans *rolling eyes*. Then stories about these brides being murdered by their “supposedly” rich husband for insurance money or being pimped and other horrifying stories reached the media and it became somewhat less popular.

When internet came, the trend of Filipinas marrying foreigners became popular again. However, I cannot consider that as a mail-order-bride thing anymore since there are no more middle men “agencies” but between these 2 individuals who were seeking a mate not necessarily for monetary gain because let’s face it, not all white folks are rich… yeah?

I have friends married to foreigners and they seem to be doing fine. One of them is married to an American, though that one was introduced by her sister already living in US. They communicated thru the internet, they clicked, he went to Philippines, got engaged then got married. My other friend met her husband thru chatting (when it was less dirty), the guy went over to Philippines, met the family, they clicked, lady went to Scotland, got married & now has 2 kids.

Mind you these ladies are professionals, have careers and good family background but somehow they don’t seem to click with guys back home. Someone up thread was wondering why a lady 20 yrs younger married the father of Sofia… who knows really what will click? We cannot judge based on age, culture etc…. Maybe the lady wants somebody mature or maybe they just clicked!

To wrap up, mail-order (like in the context vic is talking about) is not really a good idea because someone is bound to be scammed… it could be the guy or the lady. But if you found someone thru the internet it’s not such a bad idea provided you are extra careful. Also, this goes both ways… I have read in one of the news papers here (Dubai) about a lady scammed by a supposedly white guy from UK who had a bad luck in business who needs a loan etc...

 

[The_Iblis_Trigger]

I would do this...

 

[MavChat]

Anybody know where I can register to become a mail order groom?

 

[Phaedron]

Your courage and creativity is to be commended for that one. Let the woman order the man she wants, but the marriage is for keeps. I think this idea would work remarkably well in todays age.

 

[Badjedidude]

Let the woman order the man she wants, but the marriage is for keeps.

What makes you think that a woman buying a man would be any different than a man buying a woman?

Both genders are equally a mixture of wise and unwise in choices of prospective mates.

 

[Code S.O.L]

As meatloaf once said 'I will do anything for love, but I won't do that

As one who values his pride and self dignity over the gratification of being with someone. I find mail order bride services to be, as others have put it, a form of prostitution and human trafficking. Besides, I've heard too many stories about men paying hefty fees to ship an overseas woman over, only to lose everything via divorce.