meaningless/casual sex

[IgnoredOne]

I take extreme showers after my extreme nap.

I'm not into casual sex either, and I'm fairly conservative about women about that, unfortunately or otherwise. I just don't get any pleasure from it, essentially; it almost seems like a waste of time.

 

[PurpleDays]

Casual is a casualty to all things meaningful.

I disagree. What goes on behind the doors of another man and woman should not in the slightest affect what goes on behind those of others.

While, yes, having a partner who has engaged in casual sex prior to you, may, in an absolute worst-case scenario (and certainly not every time, to every person, by ANY means) subdue some feelings of excitement, experimentation and an overall lessening of the rose-tinted view of sex, it does not mean that their experience is lessened or is less meaningful.

Rather, I feel what is really at stake is pride. Humans, by default, seem to view sex as an embarrassing and awkward practice - which, in realities it can be (is that your foot or mine? etc).

I think any lessening on the other person's part of any "meaningful"-ness could be down to jealousy and insecurity.

Each person is different, ditto the smell of each person's skin and their naughty parts.

Sex is different every single time and is memorable and meaningful every single time.

At least, that's my take on it. And I am, shall we say, a liberal lover.

So, even the most seasoned of sexers can still feel joy, love and the beauty of a moment.

Just like the way that every rainbow, baby's smile or massive bag of doritoes is still amazing, never mind when you last had one.

---

To clarify, I meant "each person's genitals are different"

Minds out of the gutter, please.

 

[jean-vic]

Well, I guess I'm bitter towards casual sex and even more towards casual gaming. Casual is a casualty to all things meaningful.

Casual gaming must be outlawed!!

 

[condemnedsoul666]

Well, I guess I'm bitter towards casual sex and even more towards casual gaming. Casual is a casualty to all things meaningful.

Casual gaming must be outlawed!!

When does gaming become 'casual' ?

 

[jean-vic]

When does gaming become 'casual' ?

When you own a Wii and don't call your dog Urdnot Wrex!

 

[condemnedsoul666]

When does gaming become 'casual' ?

When you own a Wii and don't call your dog Urdnot Wrex!

Urdnot Wrex?
I've got a wii and no clue....

 

[jean-vic]

Urdnot Wrex?
I've got a wii and no clue....

Casual Gamer!!!

 

[PurpleDays]

When someone has a -pink- nintendo DS.

*filthy look*

 

[jean-vic]

When someone has a -pink- nintendo DS.

*filthy look*

When I read that, I strapped my LOLlerskates on and went for a spin.

 

[condemnedsoul666]

When someone has a -pink- nintendo DS.

*filthy look*

I have two, half dead black ones

 

[PurpleDays]

I have one dead shiny red and black one.

*sobs uncontrollably*

 

[IgnoredOne]

Wrex will wreck you.

 

[ShybutHi]

but I don't think anything compares to the feeling of waking up next to someone you care about, smiling at them, even though their hair is all sticking up and they have morning breath, and just giving them a good, hard, morning how-do-you-do.

Hahaha... A good, hard, morning how-do-you-do. Sounds like a good way to start the day!

 

[cool_breeze]

Wow this thread has gone downhill haha. Anyway thanks for some ideas. Well, some points to consider.

Research has shown that the higher the number of people you have slept with that the lower your chances can be to settle into a stable, long term relationship later.

Statistics for one night stands are usually something like 1/3 of people. It depends on country. It can go up to 45% or down to 10% or almost none. So anyway less than half of people seem to be doing it.

If you talk to people who have a lot of casual sex usually they will admit they regret or "aren't proud of" most of it and will say at least some of it was questionable. They'll usually continue to do it anyway though. It may go back to the fact that it's harder to get a long term relationship once you get started.

There seems to be some kind of virgin element to this thread. I don't relate to that at all. Actually what frustrates me is I think I have a very high sex drive yet it can be a long time in between when I find someone special to do it with.

I'll think it's disappointing if you realize a girl you are interested in has one night stands. Then you know she gives her body away easily.

To everyone who said it is more meaningful when it's more than just physical and is an expression of appreciation of the person's personality, I think I agree.


I want to take some action on this matter. I don't want to feel like I'm missing out on anything. As I mentioned in my first post in this thread I even get complimented a fair amount by both sexes. And I'm getting older. So should I get into casual sex? Something about dipping into that pool with diseases, mental baggage, and cheapening something beautiful just seems kinda gross though. It's been proven that loving, partnered sex gets you way more oral sex and can be more fulfilling.

I don't know. It is strange. I like sex a lot and need to meet this requirement. General society doesn't seem to differentiate between a deep connection and cheap sex anymore. Just "getting laid." I need to go now but I've been thinking about this and I want to hopefully address this...

 

[Miss Demeanour]

I think as long as you fancy the pants off each other and you're both consenting adults then there's nothing wrong with it. I personally couldn't have a one night stand myself with a total stranger no matter how good he looked. For me it's all about getting to know that person and having the proper chemistry before even considering getting between the sheets with them. I know people who don't want a serious relationship as such and are quite happy just to see each other for occasional nights out then sex at the end of it. As long as they're happy and it's not hurting anyone I can't see the problem.

 

[cool_breeze]

Ya. That's a little different Miss Demeanour. You're making what you described sound like friends with benefits, which is really a form of a relationship. That's basically just a relationship that's a little simpler and more to the point. I think those kinds of situations can be healthy.

I was just brainstorming about the full on go home with someone once and have sex the night you meet them kind of thing. I don't think that helps loneliness, though I haven't really done that so I guess I don't know exactly. But I imagine it's not really the "real thing." You get the physical sensation but lack the passion and connection.

It usually makes me sad if I find out that a girl I'm into has one night stands. If she lets people who are essentially strangers touch her like that it makes me less attracted to her.

 

[littlerivers]

Research has shown that the higher the number of people you have slept with that the lower your chances can be to settle into a stable, long term relationship later.

Statistics for one night stands are usually something like 1/3 of people. It depends on country. It can go up to 45% or down to 10% or almost none. So anyway less than half of people seem to be doing it.

Excuse me, as someone who has taken one semester in statistics, I feel that I am qualified to say that this doesn't necessarily mean anything. (Please note sarcasm.)It doesn't mean that if you have casual sex, you directly increase your chances of failing at long term relationships. I'd say it's more likely that people who are inclined towards casual sex tend to dislike making long term commitments. Then again, I hated stats and missed most of the lectures.

I'll think it's disappointing if you realize a girl you are interested in has one night stands. Then you know she gives her body away easily.

That's silly. She's not a rental DVD. I think that if someone wants to have casual sex, that's their choice and it's not a woman's responsibility to save herself for a special man to posess any more than it is for a man to protect his precious mantreasure on a night out if he doesn't want to.

It's been proven that loving, partnered sex gets you way more oral sex and can be more fulfilling.

I had to read that twice. xD
How did they perform that study?

 

[Trojan]

Studies show that girls tend not to sook the banger on a one night stand.
lulz

 

[IgnoredOne]

Studies show that girls tend not to sook the banger on a one night stand.
lulz

Clearly they haven't run those studies in London.

"My mouth tastes of penis...I forgot, did I suck someone off?"

Some things heard cannot be unheard. Sigh.

 

[Callie]

I won't have meaningless sex. Call me a prude (and yes, I have been called that), but if there's not something more there, I don't believe it's worth it.