Not man enough?

[user 139760]

EDIT:
And for the record, I wish that NO female was fat or ugly. In a perfect world, you would all be petite 10/10s.
Who stop aging at 22.
And love introverts...

Gee, thanks for deciding for all of us. Guess I'll have to find a way to move ro Valhalla after all

 

[TropicalStarfish]

I do have a theme, I like that you noticed I think when I first joined here I touched on the same old things its interesting to me, however, men can say their fat wife isnt doing it for them on here and everyone understands them but if I say my fellas beta behaviour isnt doing it for me then im the reason men wanna be single and alone


This is the thing I dont want you all to be Bruce Waynes I want all types of men to exist I just dont wanna date all of them not sure why it always translates into me saying I think every man has to be X I really and truly and honestly mean romantically thats it, the rest of you I wish you happiness in all that you do.

Men, 'can,' say certain things. Doesn't mean they should...

 

[CenotaphGirl]

Men, 'can,' say certain things. Doesn't mean they should...

But why shouldn't they… if thats the truth?

 

[Murakami_1]

But why shouldn't they… if thats the truth?

Maybe because people do have feelings
Everyone has an opinion, doesn't mean everyone has to share it, or even hear it hahaha

 

[TheSkaFish]

But why shouldn't they… if thats the truth?

Because some things are just rude to say, especially if it's not something the person can control, or not something they can control very easily.

It's like "blaming" someone for something that isn't really their fault.
Or maybe it kind of is, but kind of isn't, at the same time.

For example, I always felt this way growing up, being blamed for not being the "right" kind of guy.
But it always made me angry because I felt like I didn't choose to be like this, the traits I was born with, the way my mind and personality work, the interests I gravitated towards. I just was the way I was.

I think this is a big part of why I've had such a difficult time adjusting to the dating scene - because it involves accepting "blame" for things that I've never really thought of or felt were my "fault" or things that I consciously chose, but that I thought were just the way I randomly was. It is still something I have a hard time wrapping my head around.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

Maybe because people do have feelings
Everyone has an opinion, doesn't mean everyone has to share it, or even hear it hahaha

Sadly you have to risk offending to have an authentic conversation. Like I dont agree with censorship in any form. I believe everyone has a right to share their opinion however, I agree that everyone doesn't have to listen to it

Because some things are just rude to say, especially if it's not something the person can control, or not something they can control very easily.

It's like "blaming" someone for something that isn't really their fault.
Or maybe it kind of is, but kind of isn't, at the same time.

For example, I always felt this way growing up, being blamed for not being the "right" kind of guy.
But it always made me angry because I felt like I didn't choose to be like this, the traits I was born with, the way my mind and personality work, the interests I gravitated towards. I just was the way I was.

I think this is a big part of why I've had such a difficult time adjusting to the dating scene - because it involves accepting "blame" for things that I've never really thought of or felt were my "fault" or things that I consciously chose, but that I thought were just the way I randomly was. It is still something I have a hard time wrapping my head around.

Hmm lost in translation, so my point was men come on here and have over a million threads about not liking old women, their fat old wives lol but if I make one thread about not liking feminine behaviour in a man so many freak out…

I can accept when men are attracted to young hot women like myself, so why cant they accept that I like men who I consider manly?

I think its sad you feel “blamed” ska, can I pick at this? do you feel like you are “blamed” because you have to accept you wont get the results you want due to your genetics? Or do you feel blamed because people literally tell you its your fault you havent found love yet, you arent trying hard enough?

 

[Unsigned]

Because some things are just rude to say

I agree. There are some things that are almost guaranteed to start trouble when said to the wrong person.
I think it's downright foolish to start those kinds of conversations.
Makes one a trouble maker.
For example, telling a coal miner who has never done anything else his whole life that he should find another job because "coal is bad".
Not something you'd want to say to a guy in a bar in Kentucky or something.
Or telling a vegan that not allowing their kids to eat meat is bad for their physical development.
Not something you want to say at "Burning Man" or something.

Sadly you have to risk offending to have an authentic conversation. Like I dont agree with censorship in any form. I believe everyone has a right to share their opinion however, I agree that everyone doesn't have to listen to it

Totally agree. This is called "freedom of speech" and I am all for it, unless it is to purposely provoke someone, like I stated above.
TBH, I don't think anything said in this thread or the "brother's ugly GF" thread has crossed the line.
In fact, most people & threads here do not cross the line.
And I don't think I do either...but some may disagree...

 

[NotThrivingStillSmiling]

none of us are born men or women. we are born male and female. very simple. not all males and females go on to be men and women, and even if you get there, you still have to fight, or be willing to fight, to maintain it.

men and women are social constructs, we made them up, in our imagination (same as money, countries, religions)....that makes them no less powerful, important or crucial.... and there is balance, there is good in bad, there is bad in good, yin flows into yang and yang into yin. a man needs some feminine traits, co-operation, calmness, diplomacy, else he just gonna be fighting in a hot headed rage constantly. women need masculine traits...particularly if they don't have a man to shield them and hold a safe space for them against the world...men are going to test women, and women are going to test men. that's relationships, you aint gonna be there at the lowest you aint never gonna see the highs...

i think we have turned men and masculine into a dirty word in todays society, so many males fear becoming men as they dont wish to intimidate or frighten, but mans primary purpose is to protect and provide. i think we have forgotten that now the 'state' does it all for you. but who protects you when the state is corrupted?

 

[CenotaphGirl]

I agree. There are some things that are almost guaranteed to start trouble when said to the wrong person.
I think it's downright foolish to start those kinds of conversations.
Makes one a trouble maker.
For example, telling a coal miner who has never done anything else his whole life that he should find another job because "coal is bad".
Not something you'd want to say to a guy in a bar in Kentucky or something.
Or telling a vegan that not allowing their kids to eat meat is bad for their physical development.
Not something you want to say at "Burning Man" or something.


Totally agree. This is called "freedom of speech" and I am all for it, unless it is to purposely provoke someone, like I stated above.
TBH, I don't think anything said in this thread or the "brother's ugly GF" thread has crossed the line.
In fact, most people & threads here do not cross the line.
And I don't think I do either...but some may disagree...

Everything I say crosses a line because everything I say is not allowed apparently all you men can say whatever you want old women this and fat women that, make up this no tattoos that… i have no idea why people read my threads of they wanna get triggered about it, im only rambling about my romantic life. If someone is a man who appreciates a good cry, more power to them, am I still allowed to vent about not wanting my own fella to do it? Should I take all the… “I dont like women with cosmetics” threads personally?

My thread about my brother actually triggered me so I wont even touch on that… and end rant…

 

[Unsigned]

but who protects you when the state is corrupted?

Or sitting in the Dunkin parking lot eating donuts...

 

[CenotaphGirl]

none of us are born men or women. we are born male and female. very simple. not all males and females go on to be men and women, and even if you get there, you still have to fight, or be willing to fight, to maintain it.

men and women are social constructs, we made them up, in our imagination (same as money, countries, religions)....that makes them no less powerful, important or crucial.... and there is balance, there is good in bad, there is bad in good, yin flows into yang and yang into yin. a man needs some feminine traits, co-operation, calmness, diplomacy, else he just gonna be fighting in a hot headed rage constantly. women need masculine traits...particularly if they don't have a man to shield them and hold a safe space for them against the world...men are going to test women, and women are going to test men. that's relationships, you aint gonna be there at the lowest you aint never gonna see the highs...

i think we have turned men and masculine into a dirty word in todays society, so many males fear becoming men as they dont wish to intimidate or frighten, but mans primary purpose is to protect and provide. i think we have forgotten that now the 'state' does it all for you. but who protects you when the state is corrupted?

I mean… I cant say my opinion on this but I find your perspective interesting and different, are you new? If so… Welcomeeee

 

[NotThrivingStillSmiling]

Everything I say crosses a line because everything I say is not allowed apparently all you men can say whatever you want old women this and fat women that, make up this no tattoos that… i have no idea why people read my threads of they wanna get triggered about it, im only rambling about my romantic life. If someone is a man who appreciates a good cry, more power to them, am I still allowed to vent about not wanting my own fella to do it? Should I take all the… “I dont like women with cosmetics” threads personally?

My thread about my brother actually triggered me so I wont even touch on that… and end rant…

aaah if u want you can take everything personally (boooring!) or just tell them to eff off and sing your heart out. bugger all point in feeling ANYTHING if ya just gonna deny your emotions or afraid to voice them....someones gonna get upset somewhere, but i'm sure its 'their' problem. them' s the rules

 

[NotThrivingStillSmiling]

I mean… I cant say my opinion on this but I find your perspective interesting and different, are you new? If so… Welcomeeee

say it loud say it clear ruuudegirl, thats what we're here for

 

[CenotaphGirl]

say it loud say it clear ruuudegirl, thats what we're here for

Now the new person thinks im rude, despite popular belief I am actually the princess of the forum I will leave my opinion to the imagination

 

[NotThrivingStillSmiling]

ffs i just spat my coffee all over the laptop i dont think your any less rude than anyone else (we can all be rude at times, humans,bah!) its ahem, a colloquial term of endearment. all good, im sure you can find other things to fret about. Ruuuuudegal

 

[NotThrivingStillSmiling]

are you new? If so… Welcomeeee

yeah apparently im still the 'new' member and been here a week, someone else needs to come along so my stupid essay marathon intro can disappear into the ether already

 

[Sci-Fi]

Wouldn't being at least willing to try to protect your partner be a worthwhile trait? Any guy that wouldn't risk his life to protect his gal is worthless in my book!

Why does it have to be a primary requirement? Why can't loving someone for who they are and not what they can provide you be more important.

Not worthless in general just of no worth to me personally. I think there are a lot of women who like men like that… in touch with their feminine side but I dont know how to force myself to be attracted to that, wish I could as thats how 99% of men behave now

Generalizing much, 99% of men eh. Where did you pull that stat from. You can be attracted to whatever you are attracted to, everyone has their own attractions. But when you want to pretty much crap on anyone who doesn't meet your standards you are going to get a backlash.

And to another remark you made about the men on here in regards to complaning about their fat ugly wives, a lot of the guys on here are single and not even married. Also that isn't what most of the guys on here complain about, it's the complete opposite, it is more about how they can't get a woman. The only person I've seen complaining about an UGLY mate was you about your brothers girlfriend. The guys on here have been jumped on many, many, many times for remarks they've made about women.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

Why does it have to be a primary requirement? Why can't loving someone for who they are and not what they can provide you be more important.


Generalizing much, 99% of men eh. Where did you pull that stat from. You can be attracted to whatever you are attracted to, everyone has their own attractions. But when you want to pretty much crap on anyone who doesn't meet your standards you are going to get a backlash.

And to another remark you made about the men on here in regards to complaning about their fat ugly wives, a lot of the guys on here are single and not even married. Also that isn't what most of the guys on here complain about, it's the complete opposite, it is more about how they can't get a woman. The only person I've seen complaining about an UGLY mate was you about your brothers girlfriend. The guys on here have been jumped on many, many, many times for remarks they've made about women.

It was more of an opinion than a fact. I feel like most people I meet regardless or gender prefer men to be more feminine. I would deffo say thats a huge factor in the culture I live in.

Okay this is where everyone loses me… how did I crap on anyone? As thats not my intention. I havent edited anything so quote… quote where… as I have no clue why people make statements like that knowing I cant edit and dont edit. So where? I’ll wait… as my whole story is about my fella letting someone complain for him nothing to do with anyone else.

As for ugly wife story, I was trying to be funny and referencing a recent post… not all posts and I didnt see any backlash there rather more understanding than anything. So I was like well why can everyone understand that and not what I am trying to say.

Backlash is fine I suppose but I thought its just annoying as I was just expressing my own relationship preference not attempting to crap on people. Not at all.

Anyway you’re the mod so, dont wanna get on your bad side

 

[okidoke]

Why does it have to be a primary requirement? Why can't loving someone for who they are and not what they can provide you be more important.

I don’t see where I wrote “primary” requirement. Of course you should love someone for who they are. Hopefully they aren’t some woos who wouldn’t even be willing to protect their partner. It’s my opinion. You don’t have to agree with me.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

People wishhh I would say all men I wouldnt date are losers, pathetic, of no value to anyone. Because thats how they see people they wouldn't date. I like the lords design in its entirety. I see theres space of everyone on this ball of water. I make a point of leaving a man in his feminine energy rather than trying to change him. To me, thats ideal. I wont be forced into a masculine role so I see respect in that.

But if any of you can find a quote from me in which you feel defecated on… let me know, even in pm… I would love to explain myself as far as I can see I have done no such thing but as a mod seems to think so… thats concerning like i said… i’ll wait…