Oh please I know you like to shower your lovers ApxieeeeIs it wrong if she asks for some gifts sometimes to make her feel special?
No, it isn't wrong.
Would you feel insulted?
No, not insulted. Concerned, but not insulted.
Would you understand?
Probably more than what she's comfortable with me understanding.
See the thing is gifts dont have to cost money, it could be a jar of hearts with 1 thing you love about the person. Its not like you have to get a girl a sports car. But I also understand that having no money often puts a hinderance on romance when you need time to think about how to eat and pay bills.I have no money, Ceno.
I've never made even $30K/year.
The women I end up with, typically earn way more than me and outclass me across the board. They make more money, they're more attractive, typically in better shape than me.
The thing is, they're not happy.
But they end up with me because even though I struggle I can do more with less and they're like "how tf are you doing more with less and just handling it and being relatively content?"
You ever wonder why a car can't have both a manual transmission and an automatic transmission at the exact same time?
It's because the mechanics of what make up a car, they're not built that way. They just aren't.
Which is why you can't simultaneously be independent and codependent at the same exact time.
Codependent structuring yields more in life, but it also costs more.
Independent structuring yields less, but it also costs less IF of course you raise your mental fortitude and gumption to the ability to give up the luxury of codependent yields.
Which, most people just don't want to do.
That's how you end up in the "well, I've got a Bugatti, but it won't start" situation.
And when your car breaks down, you've really only got two options:
Either you gotta figure it out yourself and get your hands dirty, or you gotta take it to a mechanic and have him fix it for you.
And if you wanna keep a woman as a man, you've kind of got to be able to do both and without being a jerk and complaining about having to do both. The later of which requires a lot more patience than what most people have.
I knew an older automechanic years ago named Steve.
He once said:
"She's beautiful, isn't she? She's not mine though. I'm just building her."
I mean it's kinda messed up, but it be like that when you're a man.
I don't like it, that's just how it is though. No, I don't like it, but I mean, that's why you can't make the central focal point of your life be your lover.
Because if you make your central focal point of your life be your lover instead of your structural life, than your lover can just leave you and it'll fresia up your life. That's good for nobody, and it's proof of faulty codependent life structuring.
Ya wanna get crap done, you've gotta do it yourself. Begrudgingly, but by yourself nevertheless.
Business entrepreneurship and ownership is even codependent structuring:
Because without a combination of both a staff as well as customers, you're not in business. And the problem is: In order to start in business you've gotta make an investment, which means you start in Debt, and you've gotta build your way back up to a Balance and that's long and far before you even start seeing a Profit from your investment.
It's hard, very hard.
And like I said, takes way more time and effort than what most people have and/or are willing to put into it.
Nobody wants it to be that way, it just is that way.
Everybody would like a single car that can do either manual transmission or automatic transmission, but the fact of the matter is: That will never happen, because that's just not realistically mechanically how a car is built.
With of course the exception of the new EVs.
So can I give her gifts? Yeah.
But I mean I could also just plow her for an hour or two and then cuddle up and watch whatever she wants to watch with refreshments and aftercare, and most of the time that suffices.
They aren't with me because of what I can materialistically provide, they're with me because I can fix their busted Bugatti and teach them how to fix it so that they don't have to keep relying on others to do it for them.
It's kinda like:
How you can teach someone everything that you know, but you can't make them willing to do what you do, even if you teach everything to them.
When you're young, yes, you can afford the luxury of taking your car to the mechanic more often. The general rule of thumb is that under 30 or 40, and you're expected to not know or not understand this kind of crap about life yet so you get a limited supply of free passes from society. At 40+, you've either gotta have a phD in Forked Tongue Linguistics, or you gotta know how to fix your own Bugatti.
See the thing is gifts dont have to cost money, it could be a jar of hearts with 1 thing you love about the person. Its not like you have to get a girl a sports car. But I also understand that having no money often puts a hinderance on romance when you need time to think about how to eat and pay bills.
Im so nosey but what do ya do again Apexie?
Hats off. Did that for a time in an Engineering company. Wasn't quite that, but similar, I headed logistics. Still wonder how I managed that without going to jail for voluntary manslaughter. Wouldn't do it again.I have a background in Logistics And Operations Wholesale Distribution Management. So basically, to put it simply: I'm the guy who reads the market by the inventory and then goes and calls out the marketing and sales department for being full of shaite and blowing the bank account out under the operative assumption of success.
The trouble is, there are no jobs like that where I live. So basically what I'm doing is building a system inside a system that mimics the primary system on a more practical level to locale.
I knew a guy like that too. Great man. Total arse. Was insane. CLINICALLY so lol. Great at his job however. He'd just yell at you for random reasons. I learned a ton I've now forgotten about management and logistics from him. To this day, only man I've ever known to admit out loud he hates his children and if he could've gone back in time, he would've made sure he never had any...
This sentence stood out to me. I didn't read the rest of it, but they actually can have both now. They are technically automatic, but you can also shift them yourself. My car is like that.
Ah yes I remember now you work in management. I genuinely think you are underpaid! Deserve £55,000+ for management roles, driver jobs are £40,000 over here let alone manager jobs! Hope you get a well deserved riseI have a background in Logistics And Operations Wholesale Distribution Management. So basically, to put it simply: I'm the guy who reads the market by the inventory and then goes and calls out the marketing and sales department for being full of shaite and blowing the bank account out under the operative assumption of success.
The trouble is, there are no jobs like that where I live. So basically what I'm doing is building a system inside a system that mimics the primary system on a more practical level to locale.
Ah yes I remember now you work in management. I genuinely think you are underpaid! Deserve £55,000+ for management roles, driver jobs are £40,000 over here let alone manager jobs! Hope you get a well deserved rise
I'm in my thirties, studied cityplanning and archeology. And right now i'm worktraining meaning that i train to get a work. I work with firewood for the municipality in the city i live in. Hopefully i get to work with what i studied for the municipality, right now i'm tired of working job to job.I have no money, Ceno.
I've never made even $30K/year.
The women I end up with, typically earn way more than me and outclass me across the board. They make more money, they're more attractive, typically in better shape than me.
The thing is, they're not happy.
But they end up with me because even though I struggle I can do more with less and they're like "how tf are you doing more with less and just handling it and being relatively content?"
You ever wonder why a car can't have both a manual transmission and an automatic transmission at the exact same time?
It's because the mechanics of what make up a car, they're not built that way. They just aren't.
Which is why you can't simultaneously be independent and codependent at the same exact time.
Codependent structuring yields more in life, but it also costs more.
Independent structuring yields less, but it also costs less IF of course you raise your mental fortitude and gumption to the ability to give up the luxury of codependent yields.
Which, most people just don't want to do.
That's how you end up in the "well, I've got a Bugatti, but it won't start" situation.
And when your car breaks down, you've really only got two options:
Either you gotta figure it out yourself and get your hands dirty, or you gotta take it to a mechanic and have him fix it for you.
And if you wanna keep a woman as a man, you've kind of got to be able to do both and without being a jerk and complaining about having to do both. The later of which requires a lot more patience than what most people have.
I knew an older automechanic years ago named Steve.
He once said:
"She's beautiful, isn't she? She's not mine though. I'm just building her."
I mean it's kinda messed up, but it be like that when you're a man.
I don't like it, that's just how it is though. No, I don't like it, but I mean, that's why you can't make the central focal point of your life be your lover.
Because if you make your central focal point of your life be your lover instead of your structural life, than your lover can just leave you and it'll fresia up your life. That's good for nobody, and it's proof of faulty codependent life structuring.
Ya wanna get crap done, you've gotta do it yourself. Begrudgingly, but by yourself nevertheless.
Business entrepreneurship and ownership is even codependent structuring:
Because without a combination of both a staff as well as customers, you're not in business. And the problem is: In order to start in business you've gotta make an investment, which means you start in Debt, and you've gotta build your way back up to a Balance and that's long and far before you even start seeing a Profit from your investment.
It's hard, very hard.
And like I said, takes way more time and effort than what most people have and/or are willing to put into it.
Nobody wants it to be that way, it just is that way.
Everybody would like a single car that can do either manual transmission or automatic transmission, but the fact of the matter is: That will never happen, because that's just not realistically mechanically how a car is built.
With of course the exception of the new EVs.
So can I give her gifts? Yeah.
But I mean I could also just plow her for an hour or two and then cuddle up and watch whatever she wants to watch with refreshments and aftercare, and most of the time that suffices.
They aren't with me because of what I can materialistically provide, they're with me because I can fix their busted Bugatti and teach them how to fix it so that they don't have to keep relying on others to do it for them.
It's kinda like:
How you can teach someone everything that you know, but you can't make them willing to do what you do, even if you teach everything to them.
When you're young, yes, you can afford the luxury of taking your car to the mechanic more often. The general rule of thumb is that under 30 or 40, and you're expected to not know or not understand this kind of crap about life yet so you get a limited supply of free passes from society. At 40+, you've either gotta have a phD in Forked Tongue Linguistics, or you gotta know how to fix your own Bugatti.
Materialism is, not unto me.^Agreed with all of the above
^ Have you ever thought about changing that? I don't mean that in any sarcastic way at all. You're a smart guy, and I agree with what Ceno said, you sound very underpaid for your knowledge and abilities. I see your posts sometimes and I feel like your workplaces are taking advantage of you big-time - I feel like it's criminal.
I know there's the debt issue, which really sucks about education here in the US, but I feel like you'd make your money back and still wind up better off for it. Plus, I think you'd wind up in better roles that are less physically demanding. Maybe consider it an investment in your health?
I know you said you weren't interested in business either - but that's the thing, neither am I really, and I have a degree in it. I wound up there because it generally doesn't require physical risk, exposure to industrial accidents or violence, exposure to toxins or blood and diseases, doesn't require quick thinking, and was the next-best-paying thing available, since I didn't have the math grades for engineering (or the lungs, for all the cigarettes I'd have to smoke if I was in engineering, from the stress, and from being good at math and nothing else). What I liked didn't factor in to my decision, because I didn't like being made to go to school every day, so I figured I wouldn't like being made to go to work every day either, and if I'm not going to like what I'm doing anyway, I might as well do what pays the most and have the best possible quality of life outside of work, which I considered my real life. And the more I can get paid, the less I'd feel like I was being screwed out of my time, and by extension, my life. Also I never knew what job I really wanted or liked - as a kid my main interest was relaxing, consuming entertainment and information, and unstructured play, because it didn't require you to be good at it to enjoy it and I didn't think I was naturally good at anything and therefore didn't think I could meaningfully and significantly improve enough at anything to get good at it, and also, I genuinely enjoyed it. But that doesn't correspond to a job though, and I've come to the conclusion that there is no other way to get a good quality of life than being in skilled work of some kind, and I feel like I'm more suited to knowledge work than the trades - I feel more bookish and don't have the body for it.
Or you could major in something else completely and start a whole new career trajectory.
Either way I think you'd do well
Ah yes I remember now you work in management. I genuinely think you are underpaid! Deserve £55,000+ for management roles, driver jobs are £40,000 over here let alone manager jobs! Hope you get a well deserved rise
I think that's what the "Lydia" character did on Breaking Bad.
