Unattractive

[Claudia1794]

Its hopeless. Even when I think positive no ones interested in me.

Its not just thinking positive....you have to be it own it Be the person you want to be. You are your only obstacle

 

[SpectraApocalypse]

Its not just thinking positive....you have to be it own it Be the person you want to be. You are your only obstacle

Not really when its somebody else deciding whether theyre attracted to me or not. I cant make anyone like me.

 

[Yeti1980]

Marijuana is not DOPE

I'm English so perhaps we're missing something in translation here, over here we say dope, weed, skunk, ganja etc etc and it all means Marijuana.

To the OP, whatever has happened to you and however unwanted you feel, using substances to make yourself feel better doesn't help in reality. In the long term substances always take away more than they give, using drugs isn't an investment in anyone's future.

It's important to take stock and think about the things you really want in life and the best ways of getting there.

If other people ( family, friends or whoever) have seemed uncaring, it's no reason not to love yourself and look for the best in things.

 

[Claudia1794]

I'm English so perhaps we're missing something in translation here, over here we say dope, weed, skunk, ganja etc etc and it all means Marijuana.

Apologies...Im in southern US, Dope is "bad".

 

[Claudia1794]

Not really when its somebody else deciding whether theyre attracted to me or not. I cant make anyone like me.

How can someone like you if you don't like yourself? No you can't make people like you but you can improve the things you dislike about yourself which will boost your confidence.

 

[maybetrollingmaybenot]

It really just feels like no one will ever wanna be with me. No one I meet is ever interested in me. Im just gonna be alone forever, smoking weed and being mad about it. It really hurts when every woman you speak to ghosts you and gives you the cold shoulder 24/7. Im sure this is an obvious question but does anyone else feel this way? **** love is all I gotta say.

I unironically think weed may contribute to your depression. Plus, you're young which is great.

 

[maybetrollingmaybenot]

Im fat, I have an ugly face, messy hair, acne and scars all over my face, bad teeth and Im weak as hell.

Even if you're fat you can't be fat and weak:

 

[CenotaphGirl]

It really just feels like no one will ever wanna be with me. No one I meet is ever interested in me. Im just gonna be alone forever, smoking weed and being mad about it. It really hurts when every woman you speak to ghosts you and gives you the cold shoulder 24/7. Im sure this is an obvious question but does anyone else feel this way? **** love is all I gotta say.

It's hard when it feels like the world is against you, I used to think this way especially when I was rejected from a school dance by a guy I almost worshipped. I felt completely worthless. I've never been satisfied with how I look, I have had various cosmetic procedures to just feel like I am able to be in the same room as people. Issue is looks matter to a certain extent in my opinion, so my only advice is to try a 30 day challenge... 30 days, with a vigorous hygiene regime, skin care regime, exercise and healthy eating regime. Just try 30 days, see your confidence improve, to celebrate, go out of town on a mini weekend away, and notice your luck with women change as your confidence changes. It could be your turning point, if not, it was just 30 days.

 

[Claudia1794]

It's hard when it feels like the world is against you, I used to think this way especially when I was rejected from a school dance by a guy I almost worshipped. I felt completely worthless. I've never been satisfied with how I look, I have had various cosmetic procedures to just feel like I am able to be in the same room as people. Issue is looks matter to a certain extent in my opinion, so my only advice is to try a 30 day challenge... 30 days, with a vigorous hygiene regime, skin care regime, exercise and healthy eating regime. Just try 30 days, see your confidence improve, to celebrate, go out of town on a mini weekend away, and notice your luck with women change as your confidence changes. It could be your turning point, if not, it was just 30 days.

Exactly what I was trying to communicate. Thank you

 

[M_also_lonely]

It really just feels like no one will ever wanna be with me.

Why should they be? Is there anything about you that would 'attract' someone? Analyze this from a '3rd person's' perspective and try to make a list. Is there anything in there? If you were a woman, would you be 'attracted' to the person that is currently you? Why/Why not?

No one I meet is ever interested in me.

They can't be. They can't be interested in you, me or anyone. You aren't attracted to a woman for her simply existing. You like certain qualities, like physical attractiveness, femininity, friendliness, etc. Right?

Think about the term 'to be attracted to'. Does it not mean, 'drawn to' ? What is it about you that in your opinion, should draw them towards you?

Im just gonna be alone forever, smoking weed and being mad about it.

When someone tries to help you, they do it because the negativity they see is repulsive and they're trying to get rid of it. That's how bad negativity is.
When you instead say, "I am no more a person who indulges in addiction." "I am not on nofap, I am just not the man who indulges in masturbation." Then that's powerful. That attitude attractive. That attitude is NECESSARY.

It really hurts when every woman you speak to ghosts you and gives you the cold shoulder 24/7. Im sure this is an obvious question but does anyone else feel this way? **** love is all I gotta say.

Then stop chasing them!!! Stop it! The idea of men chasing women is ridiculous!! The value that man offers is a manually created value. The idea of creating value and then begging to someone to enjoy the fruits of that value makes no sense. That's why men of high value do not chase women.

Instead, put all that energy in improving yourself in areas that you think need some work. It could (and should) be a multitude of things. Health, family, hygiene, career, wealth, communication skills, knowledge, hobbies, network. Have you maxxed these out? Any one of these if not many?
No? Then how can you claim that you're going to be like this forever?
You absolutely have no idea how things change when you reach a certain level of holistic improvement. But as a male, work has to be put in. Its not a choice, its a necessity.

Pick the areas that suit your situation to work on and start working on them. Come on! Get up from your bed, we have a lot to conquer!!

(I am sending you something in DM.)

 

[Rohini]

You are just repeating what everyone says, but never mean. He lives in the real world, not a fantasy world where looks don't matter.

I said looks we're not the end-all-be-all. They aren't.
I'm not "repeating anything" so don't put words into my mouth either.
I've already said in other posts what Callie reiterated here...

You can't say that "I don't mean" anything, when you know literally nothing about me.
Don't bunch me in with others, I'm not them. Thanks

 

[Rohini]

OP is dead set in his line of thinking, no amount of positivity anyone shares here is going to pull him out of his woe-is-me-I'm the-biggest-loser-in the-world line of thinking bc he doesn't want to change it.

You can tell relatively quickly who is sincerely looking for advice and those who want to wallow away with excuses and misery forever and ever.

 

[TheRealCallie]

I said looks we're not the end-all-be-all. They aren't.
I'm not "repeating anything" so don't put words into my mouth either.
I've already said in other posts what Callie reiterated here...

You can't say that "I don't mean" anything, when you know literally nothing about me.
Don't bunch me in with others, I'm not them. Thanks

Lol, you were lumped in the second you didn't say what they wanted to hear. Women who say what we say are just liars and delusional, apparently. It's always been that way here, sadly.

 

[TheSkaFish]

I said looks we're not the end-all-be-all. They aren't.
I'm not "repeating anything" so don't put words into my mouth either.
I've already said in other posts what Callie reiterated here...

You can't say that "I don't mean" anything, when you know literally nothing about me.
Don't bunch me in with others, I'm not them. Thanks

That guy has done that with me before, too - putting words in my mouth, bunching me in with other people that I had no real connection to, and making all these wild, insulting, baseless, and nonsensical assumptions about my character without knowing anything about me either, all because I said that I thought the Trump administration handled covid poorly. Seems to be a pattern.

But anyway, back on topic.

 

[TheSkaFish]

It really just feels like no one will ever wanna be with me. No one I meet is ever interested in me. Im just gonna be alone forever, smoking weed and being mad about it. It really hurts when every woman you speak to ghosts you and gives you the cold shoulder 24/7. Im sure this is an obvious question but does anyone else feel this way? **** love is all I gotta say.

I feel like I get this, at least somewhat. I have a hard time getting anyone interested in me either and I also worry I'm going to be alone forever, that I'll never figure out how to be good enough or if it's just beyond me genetically - and I don't mean it in a sense of looks, but in a sense of being interesting and successful.

Anyway. Like others have said, complaining about it puts you in a bad spot because it just confirms what they're already thinking. And another thing I've noticed is, aside from generally keeping yourself clean/hygienic and in at least OK shape, the big thing is finding a way to be interesting somehow. Women seem to like guys that are good at something, and being good at something seems to give you as a guy more confidence that you are interesting, have something to talk about, and more security in yourself that you have something to offer.

I'm still struggling with figuring out how I can do that myself though, so I'm not trying to act like I have all the answers or anything. Just passing along things I've noticed and thought about, regarding this situation.

 

[NoxApex(N/A)]

Kind of, but I don't really hold women responsible for it.

Things mostly suck in the dating people for both men and women because things mostly suck outside of the dating pool.

Bankers and politicians run the world, and high level highly organized crime keeps corporations in power by manipulation of legal technicalities.

The Dating Pool, is just the Disco that everyone is Panicking at.

 

[Rohini]

Women seem to like guys that are good at something, and being good at something seems to give you as a guy more confidence

Ya know this is an excellent point, fish. It is very true.
I am enthralled by a man who can fix a roof, and the plumbing...
and absolutely feeling useful gives one purpose. Therefore..confidence. Really nice points you made here.

Or maybe that's just a sign I am getting old. Either way, there Is a lot of substance to your claim!

 

[howdidifindmyselfhere?]

So firstly the serious reply:
Feeling unattractive is a horrible thing, I have a number of medical conditons that effects the way I look, I have a curved spine, one arm massively bigger than the other and a conditon that effects my eyes so the outer me is far from what I would say is attractive. It relies on someone looking past all that and seeing the inner me.

I try not to worry about the outer me (far far easier said that done) as there is very little that I can do to change it, but what is more important is the inner me. Partly why I haven't set a profile picture on here as yet, you all get to know me because of the things that I say, not what I look like and if you like and accept me for that, then I know the inner me is all and I can be happy with the person I am on the inside, then hopefully it's just a matter of time before I find someone willing to look past the outer me and seeing the me on the inside which you are all seeing. Yes it might take a long time, (I'm more than twice your age) but I am sure that it will happen one day. Question is, are you happy with the inner you?

Ok, not so serious answer:
If you really think that way about Love, then maybe you should become a Wedding Singer:


Love doesn't stink by the way, and your statement "**** love is all I gotta say." you don't really mean that or you wouldn't be so bothered about it.

 

[Rohini]

you all get to know me because of the things that I say, not what I look like and if you like and accept me for that, then I know the inner me is all and I can be happy with the person I am on the inside, then hopefully it's just a matter of time before I find someone willing to look past the outer me and seeing the me on the inside which you are all seeing.

Bingo!!!

 

[Punisher]

I said looks we're not the end-all-be-all. They aren't.
I'm not "repeating anything" so don't put words into my mouth either.
I've already said in other posts what Callie reiterated here...

You can't say that "I don't mean" anything, when you know literally nothing about me.
Don't bunch me in with others, I'm not them. Thanks

The value of cosmetic products worldwide will say looks are important than your dishonest or ignorant opinion.

Lol, you were lumped in the second you didn't say what they wanted to hear. Women who say what we say are just liars and delusional, apparently. It's always been that way here, sadly.

I'm not ugly, so it wasn't anything about what I wanted to hear. When did I bring gender into it? You didn't like what I said, so you lumped me in with the mysogynists.