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Hoping Tim Hortons won't mess up my order today. They had a rookie working yesterday and he gave me decaf. I'd rather drink bong water.
 
The first year, I felt anger. The next, sadness. This time it's a little of both but mostly disappointment and a bleak outlook. I don't know what I'm going to do. I still feel like if I played my cards better, if I had been playing them better this whole time, then maybe things could have gone differently - maybe I might have had a chance to get what I wanted. But the way things are now, whatever chances I might get anymore almost surely won't be as good so I don't feel much motivation or optimism. The high water mark was reached, or at least it might have been, but I didn't know what to do because I wasn't ready and just had no idea and I floundered around doing one wrong thing after another. Unless my luck in this area of life should change, and so far nothing has ever indicated it will, I feel like it's probably all downhill from there now.
 
Feeling: Nothing
Hoping: To get to sleep at a reasonable hour.
Thinking: What kind of pie will I have for my tea.
Remembering: The pie i had last night for my tea.
 
I'm feeling like my depression is coming back again, I'm hoping that I'm wrong or that it goes away quickly, and I'm thinking that I would rather be dead than deal with it again.
 
Paraiyar said:
DarkSelene said:
Haven't felt 19C in a looooooooooong time, I'm freaking freezing.

Lol, that's not cold by my standards at all...

A breezy nice day here is basically always >35C, less than 25 everyone is wearing boots and scarfs out.
 
DarkSelene said:
Paraiyar said:
DarkSelene said:
Haven't felt 19C in a looooooooooong time, I'm freaking freezing.

Lol, that's not cold by my standards at all...

A breezy nice day here is basically always >35C, less than 25 everyone is wearing boots and scarfs out.

24C and people wearing scarves? lol I don't want to imagine the really hot days :p
 
Wayfarer said:
24C and people wearing scarves? lol I don't want to imagine the really hot days :p

Try climbing inside your lit fireplace and spending a few hours there, that's how it feels! hahahaha
 
DarkSelene said:
Wayfarer said:
24C and people wearing scarves? lol I don't want to imagine the really hot days :p

Try climbing inside your lit fireplace and spending a few hours there, that's how it feels! hahahaha

It was -8C/17F this morning, when it's 24C most people here are wearing pretty much nothing. Where do you live that people consider it cold?!
 
Cavey said:
It was -8C/17F this morning, when it's 24C most people here are wearing pretty much nothing. Where do you live that people consider it cold?!

Where I live a day needs to reach temperatures higher than 40C to be considered hot. Anything in the 30's is breezy and nice warm weather, anything under it is cold.

This conversation did started because I was feeling like a human popsicle at 19C... so yes, that's REALLY cold for where I live. And no, it's not the sun :p
 
I dislike living with and caring for my elderly, mood swing disordered mother. But this is the 'endgame' of a dysfunctional family and I've been soldiering on for a lot of years with no help from anyone so I'm not quitting now. I wish I still had some of my younger years back....I might have had some gladness and enjoyment, too bad it's a bit late now. Maybe old age will be OK.
 

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