It's Winter/almost Christmas which = freezing cold, wet, dark, busybusybusy towns which in turn = me staying at home, FOREVER, only going outside if I HAVE TO/when Winter/Christmas is OVER and the sales are on.
Almost every single New Years I seriously consider suicide. I usually wind up drinking way too much, hooking up with a stranger, taking drugs or making myself comatose/asleep through out it all.
Unrelated: And the usual ******** to do with him again. And I've still got a moral dilemma about the whole thing.