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When is enough, enough?

I don't even know what to aim for anymore.

I get beaten by guys with a life.

I get beaten by guys with by their own admittance, no f*cking life.

Even someone like that, can just say some bullsh*t and make someone go from seeing me as "you're so wonderful Ska" to "dead to me" in days.
I'm not just mad about that, I'm dumbstruck.
Like, knock over the desk and shrug, "I don't f*cking know, man".

What the hell am I supposed to be then? It doesn't seem to matter.

I must really suck, if literally anyone can beat me, anyone can show me up and make it like I don't exist.
I feel more unimpressive than anyone in the world.

I'm just so f*cking tired.
 
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Had a good weekend. Went shopping with mom as Jackie yesterday. Bought me a couple dresses and a gown in green. Mom spotted the gown. I also bought a couple pairs heels that said my name on them. Mom bought a dress
 

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