Luna said:I'm going to ask a guy that I met through a family friend...to go skiing with me.
I expect that he'll likely reject me.
I've been rejected so often that slowly...but surely...I am becoming used to it.
Brian said:I had my first real date a couple weeks ago. She said I could call if I wanted...called, texted a few times, no answer to anything.
I would really rather people just come out and say they aren't too keen on me instead of ignoring me.
incognitowithh said:Well now that I have herpes, it has happened a lot. I stick with only dating guys that also have it...just makes it easier and cuts down the rejection quite a bit.
Bluey said:incognitowithh said:Well now that I have herpes, it has happened a lot. I stick with only dating guys that also have it...just makes it easier and cuts down the rejection quite a bit.
You know some guys would work with you to make this not a problem.
A girl I sew about 4 years ago for only 3 months we went out with one another has this. We split but it was nothing to do with the herpes.
She did not tell me. Lucky for me I did not contract it.
It wasn't tell a year later she told me that she had it.
I was not best pleased that she did not tell me be for when we where with one another.
I can understand why she did not tho.
Maybe if I had got it I would had been less understanding of her.
Though I think if you really love someone you would find a way.
What the best time is to tell someone something like that though I would not know.... That is a very difficult one.
If you tell someone to early they run. Tell them to late they well get angry at you and run. I do think you should tell them be for anything physical happens though. My X told me there was no chance of me getting anything in less she was on an out break. That I know is not exactly true as I did some research on it myself and even got myself checked out at the docs and asked him about it as well.
Anyway I respect you for your post is honest....
incognitowithh said:Yes, the challenge is when do you tell (ALWAYS before sex, of course). For me, I'm not going to allow feelings to grow...that will only lead to a good change of being rejected and getting hurt. In big cities like mine, 1 in 3 have it. What your ex did was SO wrong...not only morally, but she can get sued for that. This happens all of the time...I hear the stories. It's quite disgusting...everyone should have a choice. She was also completely wrong about the outbreak thing...although, that could've been from her ****** doctor. Too many of them are not informed. Did you go and get an actual blood test specifically for herpes?
Bluey said:incognitowithh said:Yes, the challenge is when do you tell (ALWAYS before sex, of course). For me, I'm not going to allow feelings to grow...that will only lead to a good change of being rejected and getting hurt. In big cities like mine, 1 in 3 have it. What your ex did was SO wrong...not only morally, but she can get sued for that. This happens all of the time...I hear the stories. It's quite disgusting...everyone should have a choice. She was also completely wrong about the outbreak thing...although, that could've been from her ****** doctor. Too many of them are not informed. Did you go and get an actual blood test specifically for herpes?
WOW!!! 1 in 3. That's crazy.
Am not sure what that stats are here. I guss it might be bigger then I would think.
Am not the most active or even lucky guy so I have not been with to many partners. Maybe that's a good thing.
Since I did not get it I have to forgive her. she not had such an easy ride with things her self even though I do agree that she should of told me. What makes it worse for me is she is the only girl I have been with since I was 18. So ye it makes me very wary of this stuff. And it wasn't like we jumped in the sake on the first date you know. I do come across as confident on the net and in person. But the truth of the matter is I really am not when it comes to stuff like this and its for that reason that we where seeing one another for over a month be for I let it go any further. So she had moor then enough chances to tell me. But the past is the past and no harm was done.
I think maybe as you say she had been told wrong herself.
I did get a proper blood test for it yes.
I also told her I did that. And I also told her at the time that if I had it I would be doing jail time for her cos of her not telling me. I was angry at the time that I had to go to the doctors and do that. I think she was surprised at my anger tbh with you.
But for me I had to forgive her. I really hate, hating other ppl. and also I can see her way of thinking as well.
It was a wail be for I forgave her and as I say be for maybe if I had contracted it I would had gotten myself in trouble.
I have and I hope I would never hit a girl. But if I had got that I have no clue whether I could have contained myself.
Like you say she should had told me and then it would had been my choice what I do from there.
but like you I think she just got fed up of being rejected for the same reason. This is why I forgave her and become friends.
I do understand the reason why she did not say anything. She is 2 years older then me and has spent a long time living alone her self as well.
I understand what that dose to you. So maybe that's why I forgave her for what she did.
incognitowithh said:How old are you now? Seriously, having herpes isn't that big of a deal...you just have to know how to handle it. You can date others with it...join dating sites, attend meetings and join a social club. You don't get fed up with rejection and try to "recruit" people. You become a vicious, evil person if you do that, IMO. I was fed up with rejection, so I made sure I met others with it.
Bluey said:incognitowithh said:How old are you now? Seriously, having herpes isn't that big of a deal...you just have to know how to handle it. You can date others with it...join dating sites, attend meetings and join a social club. You don't get fed up with rejection and try to "recruit" people. You become a vicious, evil person if you do that, IMO. I was fed up with rejection, so I made sure I met others with it.
I am 35 now and was 31 at the time.
I think she doesn't look at it as such a big deal ether.
She told me that girls have all them things down there to deal with anyway so she just looks at it like that.
For me it is a big deal though. I have a number of problems with my health as it is. I don't need to be adding to it.
I don't have to live with herpes so maybe I do look at it as a bigger deal then what it would be.
I do know that if I loved someone that I would not let it stop me from being with them though.
The good thing about this though is she knows we did not split cos of the herpes. We split cos we where arguing all the time. We get on better as friends.
All though she has a guy lives with her now and I don't see anything of her. But that's a hole different cattle of fish I guss.
incognitowithh said:Actually, she sees it as a huge deal...that's why she lied. If you can't be honest with yourself and live true, then it's a gigantic thing in your life.
Bluey said:incognitowithh said:Actually, she sees it as a huge deal...that's why she lied. If you can't be honest with yourself and live true, then it's a gigantic thing in your life.
HA, You know. Maybe your right about that.
You just kinder knocked me back a bit there.
How old you?
I have to go now but ye that last post has really got me thinking.
You seem a totally cool girl
cheaptrickfan said:Today.
mintymint said:((((Hugs))))
EveWasFramed said:cheaptrickfan said:Today.
They obviously don't know what they're gonna be missing.
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