Your World: friend or foe?

[Solitary man]

The world was a kinder, more benevolent place when I was younger, or at least that is how I perceived it. As I reached my thirties I began to detect an unprecedented level of phoniness in people, it seemed as if everyone around me was a total fake and an actor. Then I began to detect not just phoniness, but a mean, nasty, malicious streak in people. I became a misanthrope as I had no choice; people seemed horrible and it was impossible to like them.

I wanted to be friends with the world, but everywhere I detected insecurity, fear, disingenuousness, selfishness, egotism, deviousness, duplicity, deceit, herd mentality, cowardice, rudeness and hostility in people. The world was presenting itself as an increasingly dark and hostile environment. I didn't want to erect barriers, but for self preservation there seemed to be no choice.

What's it like in your world? Are the people friendly, genuine, likeable and trustworthy? Or like me, have you discovered that no matter how nice you are, the world is a hostile place from which you are coerced to seek sanctuary?

 

[floffyschneeman]

Of course there will always be bad things about the world, specially about people and in people. Like there are bad sides in each of us. Sometimes I do think that I am hurt by people, yet I always find joy in how humans can connect to each other and show compassion. It could be true that the world is nicer back then, though personally, I don't think that is the case, but I think what is happening is more people are afraid to trust and risk being deceived. So they build all these barriers of protective walls like distancing themselves towards other people, or being indifferent towards others, or being mean to test and see who will really stick to them. But when you think about it, if almost everyone is distant, indifferent and mean towards other people because they are afraid of getting hurt and deceived, how can people see humanism and compassion in everyone? I find the whole thought of ''everyone is mean, therefore I be mean'' ironic because you are complaining how mean people are and yet choose to become one of them. I have thought about this before on one of my ponders while drifting to sleep, I think the only way to overcome this hostility in people is to always strive to be compassionate and kind to attest that human compassion and kindness is in each of us just as bad sides are in each of us as well. I just wish I would become braver to express these thoughts into actions. But yes, that's what I think, I hope it contributes to this topic.

 

[Tealeaf]

I think most people are reacting more to hurt, confusion, and a poor understanding of others than they are acting out of genuine malice.

 

[Solitary man]

I find the whole thought of ''everyone is mean, therefore I be mean'' ironic because you are complaining how mean people are and yet choose to become one of them. I have thought about this before on one of my ponders while drifting to sleep, I think the only way to overcome this hostility in people is to always strive to be compassionate and kind to attest that human compassion and kindness is in each of us just as bad sides are in each of us as well. I just wish I would become braver to express these thoughts into actions. But yes, that's what I think, I hope it contributes to this topic.

It does, and you make a valid point: there is an inherent hypocrisy in responding to people's meanness with meanness, then complaining about people being mean.

It's a quandary and a struggle. Should we respond to rudeness with rudeness, or should we baton down the hatches and not allow ourselves to experience other peoples moods, temperament etc?

I've experienced so much **** form other people I now go into every social interaction with a defensive attitude. I simply don't want to experience anyone's stinking attitude, I don't deserve it.

If you treat me well, I shall respond in kind. If you don't, I shall either respond with similar attitude or rise above it and ignore you. If pushed, I shall thump you, and you shall deserve it.

Take no **** and take no prisoners, the world is full of terrible people. That's my attitude.

I think most people are reacting more to hurt, confusion, and a poor understanding of others than they are acting out of genuine malice.

Yeah, I think that most people act out of ignorance and a total inability to empathise with others, not understanding that their attitudes and behaviour has an impact.

 

[Montreal Skye]

Compassion seems to be a non-existent trait in the society where I live. Too much desire for instant gratification and perfection leads people to be rude and intolerant. Everyone is in such a rush as well, what with our technology-driven way of life now - leads to even more inconsideration and if you're on the road...dangerous situations too. People are very brave when they think they're anonymous or can get away with something - shameful. All that stress leads to terrible behaviour and in a lot of cases violence against others. There also seems to be a puzzling trend of people trying their best to be mean and cruel to others online. The trolls I guess we call them, I really don't understand that at all. Taking pleasure in hurting another person baffles me. And yes, I totally agree, I find lots of people have become fake, I may be aging myself a little, but I really believe it has a lot to do with the birth of the internet, smart phones, etc...Before 1994, the internet wasn't mainstream at all, and I certainly found people to be more friendly and tolerant - generally speaking. Now though, nobody wants to take the time to get to know a person, it's very phony...a "poke" on facebook doesn't make a friendship last. Here in Quebec, there is a blanket loathing between people, based solely on the language they speak and their political views as to whether Quebec should remain in Canada or separate to be their own country, ignorance leads to more intolerance...leading to hatred...the cycle never ends.

This sad reality is hard to accept. I guess that's why I tend to isolate myself and am much happier in my solitude. I have no need to be social or have a lot of friends, but when someone special comes along and I can see they are above all that hatred, ignorance and phoniness, I hold on dearly. These diamonds in the rough, they're out there, but certainly not in the majority. And I've also discovered that the truly genuine people are a lot alike, kind of isolated and not interested in taking part in a society that treats others with contempt. Different priorities.

 

[perfanoff]

meh

 

[Lost Drifter]

I wish my world would stop...I really want to get off.

 

[Trent]

The world was a kinder, more benevolent place when I was younger, or at least that is how I perceived it. As I reached my thirties I began to detect an unprecedented level of phoniness in people, it seemed as if everyone around me was a total fake and an actor. Then I began to detect not just phoniness, but a mean, nasty, malicious streak in people. I became a misanthrope as I had no choice; people seemed horrible and it was impossible to like them.

I wanted to be friends with the world, but everywhere I detected insecurity, fear, disingenuousness, selfishness, egotism, deviousness, duplicity, deceit, herd mentality, cowardice, rudeness and hostility in people. The world was presenting itself as an increasingly dark and hostile environment. I didn't want to erect barriers, but for self preservation there seemed to be no choice.

What's it like in your world? Are the people friendly, genuine, likeable and trustworthy? Or like me, have you discovered that no matter how nice you are, the world is a hostile place from which you are coerced to seek sanctuary?

holy ****, dude

did you write this or quote this?

that's me

 

[floffyschneeman]

The world gets worse and worse, it seems because how can it not when the most basic human mindset is to respond evil with greater evil.

 

[Solitary man]

Compassion seems to be a non-existent trait in the society where I live. Too much desire for instant gratification and perfection leads people to be rude and intolerant. Everyone is in such a rush as well, what with our technology-driven way of life now - leads to even more inconsideration and if you're on the road...dangerous situations too. People are very brave when they think they're anonymous or can get away with something - shameful. All that stress leads to terrible behaviour and in a lot of cases violence against others. There also seems to be a puzzling trend of people trying their best to be mean and cruel to others online. The trolls I guess we call them, I really don't understand that at all. Taking pleasure in hurting another person baffles me. And yes, I totally agree, I find lots of people have become fake, I may be aging myself a little, but I really believe it has a lot to do with the birth of the internet, smart phones, etc...Before 1994, the internet wasn't mainstream at all, and I certainly found people to be more friendly and tolerant - generally speaking. Now though, nobody wants to take the time to get to know a person, it's very phony...a "poke" on facebook doesn't make a friendship last. Here in Quebec, there is a blanket loathing between people, based solely on the language they speak and their political views as to whether Quebec should remain in Canada or separate to be their own country, ignorance leads to more intolerance...leading to hatred...the cycle never ends.

I could laboriously go through a point by point analysis, agreeing with all of what you've said, but yeah, people are becoming meaner, more aggressive and cruel, and they generally try to get away with whatever they can. The highways have always been there, and anonymity can provide opportunities for complete bastards to do whatever they please. The internet has now enabled a totally huge avenue of opportunity for people to behave badly. Cyber-bullies and megalomaniac moderators (thankfully not on this site) use cyber-space as a means to exercise power and control over others, and to be as tyrannical as they wish; achieving a boost to their fragile egos in the process. Having spent some time on internet forums I came to the conclusion that people like to fight. If there is nothing to fight about, they'll conjure something. Conflict is many people's modus operandi, and the internet provides a means of catharsis, and letting off steam. Regrettably some people get hooked on this and go too far, it's like a type of high. They need their daily fix. Not healthy. I've discovered that life is so much more pleasurable without arguing with a total stranger about trivial **** that doesn't matter for hours, days, weeks on end ..

This sad reality is hard to accept. I guess that's why I tend to isolate myself and am much happier in my solitude. I have no need to be social or have a lot of friends, but when someone special comes along and I can see they are above all that hatred, ignorance and phoniness, I hold on dearly. These diamonds in the rough, they're out there, but certainly not in the majority. And I've also discovered that the truly genuine people are a lot alike, kind of isolated and not interested in taking part in a society that treats others with contempt. Different priorities.

I can't speak for every loner, but my lonerism comes partly from natural inclination; a stable personality characteristic if you will, and also as an effective means of keeping people at a distance. I have very little desire to associate with most people. I pick up on things very quickly, can see through people almost instantly. People ruin everything. They are the ugliness which contaminates the natural beauty of the environment and your soul. They consciously or inadvertently cause bad feeling, anxiety, depression, aggression, ill-will et al. Finding a genuine person who isn't a chronically selfish, ****** up, SOAB is a real challenge.

I wish my world would stop...I really want to get off.

I stepped off and have been leading the life of a social recluse now for 16 years. Sometimes I wish I could step back on again, as although there is a certain freedom in solitude, it can get lonely. I have made attempts at social interaction, but have discovered that my desire to socially interact with other people does not yet outweigh my desire to protect myself from them.

The world was a kinder, more benevolent place when I was younger, or at least that is how I perceived it. As I reached my thirties I began to detect an unprecedented level of phoniness in people, it seemed as if everyone around me was a total fake and an actor. Then I began to detect not just phoniness, but a mean, nasty, malicious streak in people. I became a misanthrope as I had no choice; people seemed horrible and it was impossible to like them.

I wanted to be friends with the world, but everywhere I detected insecurity, fear, disingenuousness, selfishness, egotism, deviousness, duplicity, deceit, herd mentality, cowardice, rudeness and hostility in people. The world was presenting itself as an increasingly dark and hostile environment. I didn't want to erect barriers, but for self preservation there seemed to be no choice.

What's it like in your world? Are the people friendly, genuine, likeable and trustworthy? Or like me, have you discovered that no matter how nice you are, the world is a hostile place from which you are coerced to seek sanctuary?

holy ****, dude

did you write this or quote this?

that's me

*tips hat* You are not alone.

The world gets worse and worse, it seems because how can it not when the most basic human mindset is to respond evil with greater evil.

It's a daily struggle. Rise above people's ignorance, rudeness, aggression, phoniness, contemptuousness, hate etc. or respond to like with like. I have fallen prey to retaliation on quite a few occasions. Sometimes a part of me says "yeah, **** them, what you give out you shall receive back" ...on other occasions I walk away and experience the sadness.

 

[floffyschneeman]

I hear a lot of people rant about how other people treat them, how the world treat them. But not a lot express how they think they are treating the world. I just think if a lot more people think about what they can contribute to make the world a better place would eventually make their world a better a place. If you don't like where you are, leave. That's how hard and easy it is. Better be somewhere else than continually express negative feelings on a system that you are becoming part of as well. I still see good in people, despite so many bad things happening today. There are people who devout themselves to feeding stray animals, there are people who win lottery and end up giving almost all of their winning to a charity, there are people who are willing to help and fight for strangers who are caught in an unfair situation.

In my day to day thoughts, I am more sad that I can't bring myself to ask homeless people how they are or just to give them food to eat cos I am too scared how they would react or too shy to just talk. I sometimes hate it to the point of feeling like I am a hypocrite. I don't know. For me it's sad that people nowadays are too familiar of the hurt that they feel inside yet can't recognize it on someone feeling the same. It's like one person saying ''*uck it. the world is ****, to hell with everyone..'' and another person hearing it and tells to himself...''people don't care, they just want everyone to go to hell, so *uck the world''... to me it's just ironic.... and to a point, silly.

Yes, I can see that some people have become shallow, but do I know who they really are? Do I know their struggles? Do I know the things they go through? I get sad with change as well as I don't take change that easily compared to some. I often feel saddened how kids today miss out their youth by staying too much on pc. but change is constant. It can be good or bad, but which ever way it turns out to, you can still decide to contribute to the bad change or good change.

I'm sorry if I am getting a little too emotional towards this topic. I know how important it is to just state out how one feels no matter how heavy or burdening it is. But I've just been hearing it from A LOT of people that I somehow feel that nowadays it is the norm to complain about how bad the world has become and how people are hopeless. If that is everyone's mindset, the world will never be good again. I think the world needs inspiration and the people who complain about how bad it has become are the luckier ones to see how it's changing and evolving far from what used to be genuine human kindness. we should be the one inspiring it to remember the good things.

In the end, things are just tools, people are just strangers we meet who will continually make or break us. It's up to us how we let these things mold us. We make our own little world affecting the worlds of others and is also affected by their worlds in turn.


I'll just probably get a lot of banters from posting this, so I'll just leave those thoughts out there. Thanks anyone for reading.

 

[Montreal Skye]

Solitary Man...you're right, people seem to like to fight. I've noticed there's always that person who will try to pick apart every word or idea, and to what end? A mature discussion is good, but petty debating...people love to fight - especially those hiding behind the monitor. Finding a genuine person is truly a challenge. I haven't met many over the years. The phony mask always comes off and you see the true nature. As for me, I also keep people at a distance, it's a defense mechanism. I think I've always been an introvert, so I get what you mean by "naturally inclined". I was brought up in a strict religious environment, and though I don't follow any religion now, I always thought that the "do unto others as you would have them do unto you" phrase was how I wanted to live. Problem is, no matter how much kindness and compassion you show people, it's not always returned. Sensitive people like me find that hard to handle, so yeah, I just avoid people and concentrate my efforts on lost dogs and the environment.

 

[Solitary man]

I hear a lot of people rant about how other people treat them, how the world treat them. But not a lot express how they think they are treating the world. I just think if a lot more people think about what they can contribute to make the world a better place would eventually make their world a better a place. If you don't like where you are, leave. That's how hard and easy it is. Better be somewhere else than continually express negative feelings on a system that you are becoming part of as well. I still see good in people, despite so many bad things happening today. There are people who devout themselves to feeding stray animals, there are people who win lottery and end up giving almost all of their winning to a charity, there are people who are willing to help and fight for strangers who are caught in an unfair situation.

In my day to day thoughts, I am more sad that I can't bring myself to ask homeless people how they are or just to give them food to eat cos I am too scared how they would react or too shy to just talk. I sometimes hate it to the point of feeling like I am a hypocrite. I don't know. For me it's sad that people nowadays are too familiar of the hurt that they feel inside yet can't recognize it on someone feeling the same. It's like one person saying ''*uck it. the world is ****, to hell with everyone..'' and another person hearing it and tells to himself...''people don't care, they just want everyone to go to hell, so *uck the world''... to me it's just ironic.... and to a point, silly.

Yes, I can see that some people have become shallow, but do I know who they really are? Do I know their struggles? Do I know the things they go through? I get sad with change as well as I don't take change that easily compared to some. I often feel saddened how kids today miss out their youth by staying too much on pc. but change is constant. It can be good or bad, but which ever way it turns out to, you can still decide to contribute to the bad change or good change.

I'm sorry if I am getting a little too emotional towards this topic. I know how important it is to just state out how one feels no matter how heavy or burdening it is. But I've just been hearing it from A LOT of people that I somehow feel that nowadays it is the norm to complain about how bad the world has become and how people are hopeless. If that is everyone's mindset, the world will never be good again. I think the world needs inspiration and the people who complain about how bad it has become are the luckier ones to see how it's changing and evolving far from what used to be genuine human kindness. we should be the one inspiring it to remember the good things.

In the end, things are just tools, people are just strangers we meet who will continually make or break us. It's up to us how we let these things mold us. We make our own little world affecting the worlds of others and is also affected by their worlds in turn.


I'll just probably get a lot of banters from posting this, so I'll just leave those thoughts out there. Thanks anyone for reading.

Your opinions are just as valid as anyone elses, and I take the point about many people complaining about how the world treats them, and not sparing a thought about how they treat the world.

I'm a generally good humoured, good natured person. I'm also genuine and naturally trusting, but regrettably have discovered that if you treat some people as equals and show them a modicum of respect, they think you are an idiot to be used and/or manipulated. It's usually people with low self-esteem and a lack of self worth who respond this way, and I've learned through my mistakes, that some people's sense of inferiority is so bad that if you treat them as a valuable and worthwhile human being worthy of consideration they think you're a ******* tool.

Solitary Man...you're right, people seem to like to fight. I've noticed there's always that person who will try to pick apart every word or idea, and to what end? A mature discussion is good, but petty debating...people love to fight - especially those hiding behind the monitor. Finding a genuine person is truly a challenge. I haven't met many over the years. The phony mask always comes off and you see the true nature. As for me, I also keep people at a distance, it's a defense mechanism. I think I've always been an introvert, so I get what you mean by "naturally inclined". I was brought up in a strict religious environment, and though I don't follow any religion now, I always thought that the "do unto others as you would have them do unto you" phrase was how I wanted to live. Problem is, no matter how much kindness and compassion you show people, it's not always returned. Sensitive people like me find that hard to handle, so yeah, I just avoid people and concentrate my efforts on lost dogs and the environment.

Regrettably animals are so much more likeable and lovable than many human beings. I love dogs and cats, can't say the same for people. Sensitive people have a very highly tuned emotional radar. We can detect things in others that many people can't. My instincts and intuition have told me things about people via a vibe. I haven't been able to identify or put into words what it is about a particular person that I'm feeling, but sooner or later it manifests itself, and like you say, usually when the phony mask comes off and the real person reveals themselves.

Real, genuine people can be so rare that when you encounter one it can be a little scary ie, too good to be true?

 

[Trent]

for me, life is pretty much a joke

i mean, i believe in God actually, and i don't think life is a joke to God

but in the sense that i will never live as i was intended to, THAT is THE joke

as for people sucking? lmao

i've been betrayed by:

- my father
- my mother
- grandparents
- brothers and sisters
- best friends
- coworkers
- teachers, mentors
- every woman i've given my heart and soul to

yah, so come on world? surprise me.

NO BETRAYAL would ever surprise me. never again.

that is why life is a joke to me.

because i will never again experience what i think we are intended to experience.

Trust
Family
Community
Love

i do feel love, but love is not what i used to perceive it as.

i used to have to trust, to love. because i was concerned what was in it for me. did this person make me happy, etc. now i realize that everyone is completely ****** up and can't make me happy. so, now, my love is more like that of a creator - just love with no conditions.

wanting what is best for a person.

not wanting a person to feel pain.

hoping that a person is content and happy and fulfilled.

but knowing that - in the end - i can't be any of those things, because people don't understand the concept of "apprecation". and never will.

so, my ambitions for fulfillment in this world have been taken down a notch...

from wife, kids, family, happy home, true companionship

to

creature comforts: a warm bed, a decent meal, a good lager, perhaps a vicodin to boot, wtf right?

and eventually i will die...of something...not sure what.

i just hope it isn't:

- an animal attack
- drowning
- plane crash
- or other mass disaster

when i'm gone, i hope it rains like that Alice in Chains song: Rain When I Die

when i go, i will be ready to go, for i will be leaving behind nothing of any substance...only illusion

relate?

 

[Montreal Skye]

Regrettably animals are so much more likeable and lovable than many human beings. I love dogs and cats, can't say the same for people. Sensitive people have a very highly tuned emotional radar. We can detect things in others that many people can't. My instincts and intuition have told me things about people via a vibe. I haven't been able to identify or put into words what it is about a particular person that I'm feeling, but sooner or later it manifests itself, and like you say, usually when the phony mask comes off and the real person reveals themselves.

Real, genuine people can be so rare that when you encounter one it can be a little scary ie, too good to be true?

I used to think it was too good to be true, to find someone who was genuine, honest and trustworthy - and above all the stuff we've talked about, what humanity has become. I guess I've been conditioned through my life experience to always doubt, always question a person's motives and integrity. I don't know how that served me to be honest...was I protecting myself or shielding myself away? Hindsight...but yes, it's definitely scary because if there's a hint of genuineness...it's like, oh my gosh, this could be a real honest person here...no phoniness...no inconsideration...no lies...I want to let my guard down now and take a risk...I actually did that recently, take a risk with someone. I feel lucky because I did find that one in a million genuine person, mind you, I'm 44 years old and I just found him...so like I said, they are there, but sometimes hidden away!

I've got that emotional radar that you described. It can be difficult because I let myself feel a little too much of other people's suffering and pain, but at the same time when I feel a person is happy, then I'm happy and I'm completely fulfilled. I can read a lot into people's words, but I think that's a good thing. Being sensitive was something to be teased about, reason to be taken advantage of, or bullied for, but it's a special gift as far as I'm concerned. I think it truly does make a person more genuine.

I was a misanthrope as well, and a recluse for a couple of decades, but I found that to be a very lonely way to exist. One day I just decided to try to see the best in people and in humanity. I still have my moments where I shake my head in disgust at how some people behave...but overall, that adjustment in my way of thinking has changed my life for the better. I know that's not going to be the case for everyone, but I think I am one of the lucky ones.

 

[Trent]

Regrettably animals are so much more likeable and lovable than many human beings. I love dogs and cats, can't say the same for people. Sensitive people have a very highly tuned emotional radar. We can detect things in others that many people can't. My instincts and intuition have told me things about people via a vibe. I haven't been able to identify or put into words what it is about a particular person that I'm feeling, but sooner or later it manifests itself, and like you say, usually when the phony mask comes off and the real person reveals themselves.

Real, genuine people can be so rare that when you encounter one it can be a little scary ie, too good to be true?

I used to think it was too good to be true, to find someone who was genuine, honest and trustworthy - and above all the stuff we've talked about, what humanity has become. I guess I've been conditioned through my life experience to always doubt, always question a person's motives and integrity. I don't know how that served me to be honest...was I protecting myself or shielding myself away? Hindsight...but yes, it's definitely scary because if there's a hint of genuineness...it's like, oh my gosh, this could be a real honest person here...no phoniness...no inconsideration...no lies...I want to let my guard down now and take a risk...I actually did that recently, take a risk with someone. I feel lucky because I did find that one in a million genuine person, mind you, I'm 44 years old and I just found him...so like I said, they are there, but sometimes hidden away!

I've got that emotional radar that you described. It can be difficult because I let myself feel a little too much of other people's suffering and pain, but at the same time when I feel a person is happy, then I'm happy and I'm completely fulfilled. I can read a lot into people's words, but I think that's a good thing. Being sensitive was something to be teased about, reason to be taken advantage of, or bullied for, but it's a special gift as far as I'm concerned. I think it truly does make a person more genuine.

I was a misanthrope as well, and a recluse for a couple of decades, but I found that to be a very lonely way to exist. One day I just decided to try to see the best in people and in humanity. I still have my moments where I shake my head in disgust at how some people behave...but overall, that adjustment in my way of thinking has changed my life for the better. I know that's not going to be the case for everyone, but I think I am one of the lucky ones.

i hear stories like this and the first thing i think is:

just wait till he takes you on the jerry springer show

sorry, i'm hopeless

 

[Montreal Skye]

i hear stories like this and the first thing i think is:

just wait till he takes you on the jerry springer show

sorry, i'm hopeless

Oh my gosh Trent...Jerry Springer! The "how not to live your life" show...shudder. I'm truly hopeful that you won't always feel so hopeless.

 

[Solitary man]

for me, life is pretty much a joke

i mean, i believe in God actually, and i don't think life is a joke to God

but in the sense that i will never live as i was intended to, THAT is THE joke

as for people sucking? lmao

i've been betrayed by:

- my father
- my mother
- grandparents
- brothers and sisters
- best friends
- coworkers
- teachers, mentors
- every woman i've given my heart and soul to

yah, so come on world? surprise me.

NO BETRAYAL would ever surprise me. never again.

that is why life is a joke to me.

because i will never again experience what i think we are intended to experience.

Trust
Family
Community
Love

i do feel love, but love is not what i used to perceive it as.

i used to have to trust, to love. because i was concerned what was in it for me. did this person make me happy, etc. now i realize that everyone is completely ****** up and can't make me happy. so, now, my love is more like that of a creator - just love with no conditions.

wanting what is best for a person.

not wanting a person to feel pain.

hoping that a person is content and happy and fulfilled.

but knowing that - in the end - i can't be any of those things, because people don't understand the concept of "apprecation". and never will.

so, my ambitions for fulfillment in this world have been taken down a notch...

from wife, kids, family, happy home, true companionship

to

creature comforts: a warm bed, a decent meal, a good lager, perhaps a vicodin to boot, wtf right?

and eventually i will die...of something...not sure what.

i just hope it isn't:

- an animal attack
- drowning
- plane crash
- or other mass disaster

when i'm gone, i hope it rains like that Alice in Chains song: Rain When I Die

when i go, i will be ready to go, for i will be leaving behind nothing of any substance...only illusion

relate?

Yes, very much so. I know what it feels like to be used, taken for granted and played for a fool. My good nature has made me vulnerable to deception, and when you realise that the person you gave the benefit of the doubt was just using you, well, that can hurt. Seems like you've experienced the unattractive side of a lot of people close to you. That's enough to send anyone into a deep state of depression, and you must be a strong person to have found the will to carry on.

People are ****** up. Each in their own way, some more than others, and some hurt you intentionally, whilst with others it's just a callous, incompassionate disregard, and nothing personal.

Chin up, be defiant; don't let the bastards grind you down.

Regrettably animals are so much more likeable and lovable than many human beings. I love dogs and cats, can't say the same for people. Sensitive people have a very highly tuned emotional radar. We can detect things in others that many people can't. My instincts and intuition have told me things about people via a vibe. I haven't been able to identify or put into words what it is about a particular person that I'm feeling, but sooner or later it manifests itself, and like you say, usually when the phony mask comes off and the real person reveals themselves.

Real, genuine people can be so rare that when you encounter one it can be a little scary ie, too good to be true?

I used to think it was too good to be true, to find someone who was genuine, honest and trustworthy - and above all the stuff we've talked about, what humanity has become. I guess I've been conditioned through my life experience to always doubt, always question a person's motives and integrity. I don't know how that served me to be honest...was I protecting myself or shielding myself away? Hindsight...but yes, it's definitely scary because if there's a hint of genuineness...it's like, oh my gosh, this could be a real honest person here...no phoniness...no inconsideration...no lies...I want to let my guard down now and take a risk...I actually did that recently, take a risk with someone. I feel lucky because I did find that one in a million genuine person, mind you, I'm 44 years old and I just found him...so like I said, they are there, but sometimes hidden away!

I've got that emotional radar that you described. It can be difficult because I let myself feel a little too much of other people's suffering and pain, but at the same time when I feel a person is happy, then I'm happy and I'm completely fulfilled. I can read a lot into people's words, but I think that's a good thing. Being sensitive was something to be teased about, reason to be taken advantage of, or bullied for, but it's a special gift as far as I'm concerned. I think it truly does make a person more genuine.

I was a misanthrope as well, and a recluse for a couple of decades, but I found that to be a very lonely way to exist. One day I just decided to try to see the best in people and in humanity. I still have my moments where I shake my head in disgust at how some people behave...but overall, that adjustment in my way of thinking has changed my life for the better. I know that's not going to be the case for everyone, but I think I am one of the lucky ones.

Glad to hear you found someone worthwhile at the ripe age of 44. I'm 44 too, and still searching.

 

[Trent]

That's enough to send anyone into a deep state of depression, and you must be a strong person to have found the will to carry on.

the thought of a comet collision keeps me going

^ pure entertainment factor ^

 

[IgnoredOne]

That's enough to send anyone into a deep state of depression, and you must be a strong person to have found the will to carry on.

the thought of a comet collision keeps me going

^ pure entertainment factor ^

You realize that is relatively unlikely, though?