Do You Find It Difficult To Stay Angry At Someone For A Long Period Of Time?

[Lonely in BC]

My anger lasts for years. I don't really understand forgiveness, can't get my head around it. I never forget getting screwed over either. I suspect these issues contribute to my feeling isolated. I've never entered any kind of relationship with suspicion but once the boundaries of respect have been crossed its difficult (impossible?) to go back.

 

[IgnoredOne]

I tend to hold grudges for a very, very long time. How often and how fast I forgive depends on the person and the wrongdoing.

I always knew that I liked you.

I almost never forgive either, although I permit people to atone if they very specifically do so. I also do not ask for forgiveness; neither to give nor to ask for, is the fairness I maintain.

Hate is the more appropriate word than anger for me, because while I very rarely lose the calmness, it doesn't mean that I will not try to correct the balance until I see iti s right, no matter what the cost.

 

[Limlim]

I read somewhere once that men were able to remember specific details about events long past while women were better able to remember how they felt at the time, thus contributing to them holding grudges longer.

Problem is I don't know if this was accurate or just some pseudoscience fluff some jack off posted on a blog one day. Suppose if it were true I'd be remembering a specific detail like that wouldn't I?

 

[Mouse]

Everyone has been pissed off by someone in their lives. Do you find it difficult to stay angry with those who cross you no matter what
they did? Myself, I have a great deal of trouble remaining angry when someone pisses me off. Back when I was around 17, my brother smoked the last of my stash. I was irate for a few hours, then I was ok.

Are you like me? not being able to stay mad at someone who crosses you?

Usually I am quite forgiving, only what my mother did was despicable and her remaining unrepentent about it only fuels my anger; so I steer her a wide berth and get on with loving those who are close to me.

 

[Sci-Fi]

Depends on what someone has done. But oh yeah, piss me off or cross me and I will hold a grudge for awhile. I try not to do that anymore. Once I had a female friend who was into me, but I wasn't into her the same way. She couldn't take no for an answer and I didn't speak to her for a long time, years in fact. Same with a friend of mine, stabbed me in the back and I didn't talk to him for a long time. One time my brother did something that really pissed me off, and we didn't speak to each other for months. He still thinks he did nothing wrong.

 

[roguewave]

If it was something that happened to me in adulthood, then I don't stay angry at the person. BUT, when I think about the people who harmed me as a child and teen (before I was 18 and had legal control over myself), my rage boils over. I will never forgive the adults that hurt me as an adolescent.

 

[Mouse]

It is good to vent anger, even it is at a wall. Venting helps let it all out. Writing our feelings down is theraputic.

What angers me is Mother being so lasciviously unrepentent. If she were just a tiny bit remorseful, then maybe I would be able to start walking the path of forgiveness. If the day ever comes when she does feel bad, then part of my healing will be in finding forgiveness in my heart and moving onto better things.

 

[lonelyfairy]

It depends on the person.

 

[Rayri]

Yes i am. i always have to have someone to talk to, and if i am mad i will have to break that feeling with them. Besides my mother, i cant be mad at someone for a long period of time.

 

[WishingWell]

It is difficult to make me angry, and I don't stay mad at anyone for any length of time. What I do is mostly get upset. If something upsets me to the point of feeling angry, I let go of it in a few hours. However, I am talking about every day life. If anyone every harmed someone I love, or something like that, I am sure my outlook would be a lot different!

 

[Limlim]

Sylvia Plath also makes me angry, she is to date the only person who has earned my unending rage. I would very much punch her twice were she still alive.


Also I hate violence.

 

[roguewave]

Sylvia Plath also makes me angry, she is to date the only person who has earned my unending rage. I would very much punch her twice were she still alive.


Also I hate violence.

Why Sylvia Plath? I've never read her, but I think she ended up offing herself so she was probably pretty miserable as things were.

 

[IgnoredOne]

Sylvia Plath also makes me angry, she is to date the only person who has earned my unending rage. I would very much punch her twice were she still alive.


Also I hate violence.

Hahhaha.

 

[jjam]

oops. wrong thread!

 

[VanillaCreme]

For me, it depends on who they are and what was done or said. While I don't hold grudges, I don't have any problem distancing myself from someone and leaving them alone.

 

[Limlim]

Sylvia Plath also makes me angry, she is to date the only person who has earned my unending rage. I would very much punch her twice were she still alive.


Also I hate violence.

Why Sylvia Plath? I've never read her, but I think she ended up offing herself so she was probably pretty miserable as things were.

Because she's been given license by her fan club to make a Mary Sue and not be called out on it. Though to be fair it is mostly her fan club I despise rather than herself, but it feels better to irrationally direct my annoyance at a group of unspecified people as a ball of pure hatred towards an individual made famous for writing a ****** book.

The strangest things set me off, as there are worse authors out there who deserve my wrath.

 

[Arsenic Queen]

Anger is how you feel when someone doesn't hear you or understand you. The closer you are to that person, the more it'll be difficult when they "persist" in not understanding you. Sometimes it can be a question of you, not communicating properly though. Or both having too different points of view to understand each other.

There's one person with whom it's been difficult for me to stay angry, or have clear feelings, or "let go", although I would have several reasons to be angry at him. I usually don't put up with bs from people, but with this one person, communication has been... let's say "not up to it", for clear explanations. So I stayed with unresolved feelings, but it's not anger. It's a mix of things. Questions with no answers, to which I can't get satisfied with my own hypothesis, I want the truth. But sometimes people don't care to give that to you.

 

[jjam]

^what a post!