I got flirted with today....

[Montreal Skye]

Whenever a man flirts, regardless of reason, it is such a stroke to the girly ego. Yay, you!

And, if you're interested, there no rule that says you can't show up in a day or so with a little 'thank you' basket of cookies - for 'all' who helped.....

LOL...a thank you basket...this is so good in theory...I'm just such a scaredy-cat!! It was a good eye opener for me though, my reaction when taken by surprise like that, something I need to work on. And yeah, my ego is up a notch, I too feel good when any man flirts with me!

 

[Ak5]

Good for you Skye.

It was a flirt, and you should concentrate on that. You've learned from this experience, and that's good.

 

[AFrozenSoul]

Oh, your reply makes me sad. I wish you weren't so hard on yourself, but I guess I can't understand since I'm not walking in your shoes. But I can say that I had little hope the last 18 years being alone, and now I at least see a glimmer.

Well that is the good thing about me. Since I have nothing and am not worth anything. I can kill myself and get things over with sooner rather than later. All I have to do is wait for my cat to die. Then I can pack up my stuff and shoot myself in the head.

 

[Ak5]

AFSoul - You have got to let go of your bitterness.

 

[Montreal Skye]

Good for you Skye.

It was a flirt, and you should concentrate on that. You've learned from this experience, and that's good.

Thanks Ak5! I hope I get another experience soon, although the high has not worn off yet....

Well that is the good thing about me. Since I have nothing and am not worth anything. I can kill myself and get things over with sooner rather than later. All I have to do is wait for my cat to die. Then I can pack up my stuff and shoot myself in the head.

I felt that way at the height of my depression, about 8 years ago. I had two dogs at the time and figured I'd just wait them out. In hindsight I'm glad I didn't do that because I learned that time and talking was the only way I could move past those really dark times. There is light at the end of the dark tunnel, I hope you see that soon.

 

[AFrozenSoul]

AFSoul - You have got to let go of your bitterness.

And when I don't?

I felt that way at the height of my depression, about 8 years ago. I had two dogs at the time and figured I'd just wait them out. In hindsight I'm glad I didn't do that because I learned that time and talking was the only way I could move past those really dark times. There is light at the end of the dark tunnel, I hope you see that soon.

I say I have been struck blind because there is no hope or light for me. So when the kitty dies so do I.

 

[ShybutHi]

Being bitter is pointless in the end, rise above that.

 

[AFrozenSoul]

Being bitter is pointless in the end, rise above that.

I tried and got nothing but misery by rising above it. If anything rising above it made things worse.

 

[ShybutHi]

I tried and got nothing but misery by rising above it. If anything rising above it made things worse.

Well no obviously you didn't because if you genuinely did deal with whatever the problem is and got over being bitter then it would not be worse, it would be better.
Simple as that.

If it made things worse then basically that leads me to assume that you tried forcing yourself to become less bitter than actually trying to understand and deal with where any bitterness comes from and so you basically relapsed. If you dealt with it then you would not be bitter.

You need to find a way to change your own point of view and it is almost never an instantaneous thing. You need to find subjects and activities that make you a happier person and tap into them.

I am talking generally but my point actually still stands when considering relationships too. You have to be happy with yourself before you can be happy with someone else.

 

[AFrozenSoul]

@ShybutHi: No I did rise above it and become happy and open and all that garbage. For the better part of a year. Nothing changed, like I said everything just got worse so I learned that I am just doomed to be alone and miserable so why not embrace it?

Just telling me I clearly did not get over it or I did not do it right is the lazy way out. People like to use that one to force all the blame on me. When the truth of the matter is that I am just trash and no one wants anything to do with me. If what you are telling me to do really worked then it would work in a noticeable way within a year. However, there are some people who are just pieces of trash that no one wants anything to do with regardless of their disposition. Yes it sucks but it is true. I was just lucky enough to be born as one of those people. Whether I am too ugly, smelly, stupid, etc. People want nothing to do with me no matter what I do or say.

 

[Ak5]

Good for you.

Your negative attitude seems like a great way to attract people.

 

[ShybutHi]

Just telling me I clearly did not get over it or I did not do it right is the lazy way out. People like to use that one to force all the blame on me. When the truth of the matter is that I am just trash and no one wants anything to do with me.

That is not the lazy way out at all and I still stand by what I said. What is totally the lazy way out is saying "The truth of the matter is I am just trash and no one wants anything to do with me". Like I said you did not really deal with the problem and you basically relapsed otherwise you would be happier for it. Unfortunatly I can not give specific ways to help with a negative attitude when I do not know any reasons for it. You have not even given any reasons or asked for any help from the posts I have seen, you are just projecting your negativity.

You need to "want" to deal with it yourself (try and change your own attitude, atleast figure out the way to make yourself change the attitude) and if need be, get help from a psychologist or doctor for example.

Ofcourse everything I say is just to try and help... I know all to well what it is like to feel incredibly negative and have no hope. The fact is you need to actually create the change of opinion and hope by doing things that point you in a positive direction and embrace them.

 

[Montreal Skye]

That is not the lazy way out at all and I still stand by what I said. What is totally the lazy way out is saying "The truth of the matter is I am just trash and no one wants anything to do with me". Like I said you did not really deal with the problem and you basically relapsed otherwise you would be happier for it. Unfortunatly I can not give specific ways to help with a negative attitude when I do not know any reasons for it. You have not even given any reasons or asked for any help from the posts I have seen, you are just projecting your negativity.

You need to "want" to deal with it yourself (try and change your own attitude, atleast figure out the way to make yourself change the attitude) and if need be, get help from a psychologist or doctor for example.

Ofcourse everything I say is just to try and help... I know all to well what it is like to feel incredibly negative and have no hope. The fact is you need to actually create the change of opinion and hope by doing things that point you in a positive direction and embrace them.

I agree completely. I was in a situation of despair and the lazy/easy way out would have been to keep allowing the despair to take over and eventually let it end my life. The most challenging thing in the world is to make change and to force yourself out of your comfort zone. That's frightening and difficult, especially for someone who suffers depression. If you keep thinking of your life as hopeless, then you're probably in a comfortable rut. I'm sure it doesn't feel comfortable, but that's where you feel safe because you won't or can't take that first step to get out of it. I'm just speaking from my own experience.

 

[AFrozenSoul]

Good for you.

Your negative attitude seems like a great way to attract people.

Like I have said a positive one got me less.

That is not the lazy way out at all and I still stand by what I said. What is totally the lazy way out is saying "The truth of the matter is I am just trash and no one wants anything to do with me". Like I said you did not really deal with the problem and you basically relapsed otherwise you would be happier for it. Unfortunatly I can not give specific ways to help with a negative attitude when I do not know any reasons for it. You have not even given any reasons or asked for any help from the posts I have seen, you are just projecting your negativity.

You need to "want" to deal with it yourself (try and change your own attitude, atleast figure out the way to make yourself change the attitude) and if need be, get help from a psychologist or doctor for example.

Ofcourse everything I say is just to try and help... I know all to well what it is like to feel incredibly negative and have no hope. The fact is you need to actually create the change of opinion and hope by doing things that point you in a positive direction and embrace them.

True, what I am saying is the easy way out for me. However, the other phrases I quoted are the way for OTHERS to just ignore me and feel better about how much they hate me.

I have posted plenty of threads asking for advice and help. However, they are too long and no one seems to care so I am done posting.

 

[ShybutHi]

Ah there are people out there that care, man. I care. I honestly hope that you find who you are and what brings out your happy side... I wish that for everyone.
The side that says "I want to continue enjoying what I enjoy, try and get involved if possible and follow it throughout my life because I enjoy it".

It could be anime, it could be science, it could be computer games, movies, it could be picking your nose (no wait not that one). Whatever it is you should try and embrace it because your interests are part of what makes you, you.

If you can project that you are someone who has his own interests and wish to share what you enjoy with others then there is a hell of a bigger chance that you will attract others and seem more approachable.

 

[AFrozenSoul]

Ah there are people out there that care, man. I care. I honestly hope that you find who you are and what brings out your happy side... I wish that for everyone.
The side that says "I want to continue enjoying what I enjoy, try and get involved if possible and follow it throughout my life because I enjoy it".

It could be anime, it could be science, it could be computer games, movies, it could be picking your nose (no wait not that one). Whatever it is you should try and embrace it because your interests are part of what makes you, you.

If you can project that you are someone who has his own interests and wish to share what you enjoy with others then there is a hell of a bigger chance that you will attract others and seem more approachable.

If you say so, I do embrace my interests and still no one wants anything to do with me.

 

[kamya]

Do you get joy or something out of derailing positive threads with this kind of depressing talk?

 

[AFrozenSoul]

Maybe a little, but it is you guys who talk to me and reply and all that crap. If you let me post my two cents and then pretended like I didn't the thread would not be derailed at all.

 

[IgnoredOne]

Maybe a little, but it is you guys who talk to me and reply and all that crap. If you let me post my two cents and then pretended like I didn't the thread would not be derailed at all.

Its because we actually care for your opinions. This is one of the frustrating parts of communicating with you; you are essentially extremely passive aggressive, claiming in one thread that you don't want any replies or attention, and then stating how no one ever answers you. At least figure out what you want; honesty to others is a blessing, but honesty to oneself is an absolute necessity.

 

[putter65]

That is not the lazy way out at all and I still stand by what I said. What is totally the lazy way out is saying "The truth of the matter is I am just trash and no one wants anything to do with me". Like I said you did not really deal with the problem and you basically relapsed otherwise you would be happier for it. Unfortunatly I can not give specific ways to help with a negative attitude when I do not know any reasons for it. You have not even given any reasons or asked for any help from the posts I have seen, you are just projecting your negativity.

You need to "want" to deal with it yourself (try and change your own attitude, atleast figure out the way to make yourself change the attitude) and if need be, get help from a psychologist or doctor for example.

Ofcourse everything I say is just to try and help... I know all to well what it is like to feel incredibly negative and have no hope. The fact is you need to actually create the change of opinion and hope by doing things that point you in a positive direction and embrace them.

I agree completely. I was in a situation of despair and the lazy/easy way out would have been to keep allowing the despair to take over and eventually let it end my life. The most challenging thing in the world is to make change and to force yourself out of your comfort zone. That's frightening and difficult, especially for someone who suffers depression. If you keep thinking of your life as hopeless, then you're probably in a comfortable rut. I'm sure it doesn't feel comfortable, but that's where you feel safe because you won't or can't take that first step to get out of it. I'm just speaking from my own experience.

alot of women flirt with me. I don't really take it seriously because it never is. It's just usual the customer / worker banter you get in shops.