Is Your Appearance Holding You Back From Meeting People?

[VeganAtheist]

Some people are just simply unattractive to the majority of other humans. I happen to be among those people.
It isn't something I can easily change, though, so I make very little attempt to do so.

I have somewhat of an understanding of how I am perceived based on various comments. I can't really fault anyone for their perceptions as I see them too. *shrugs*

 

[LonelyClothar]

i was born beautiful but tragically gotten uglier day, by day, by day.
The 1st thing those things see is the face.

 

[meekthoughts]

Definitely. People often say that it's the inside that counts which is very much true, but even then the first impression people get is from a person's appearance.

I'm rather unattractive myself and my build is also somewhat larger than the average female. No matter what I do, I'm always conscious of this fact, and I go further into my corner.

Then there are those people who most would objectively consider unattractive, but they put that behind them (at least upfront) and suddenly their appearance matters little. They let their personality become a second first impression. How does one go about getting this sort of confidence? I think finding an answer to this question for each individual is a good way to reduce the appearance factor when meeting people.

I hope I made sense....

 

[VeganAtheist]

Then there are those people who most would objectively consider unattractive, but they put that behind them (at least upfront) and suddenly their appearance matters little. They let their personality become a second first impression. How does one go about getting this sort of confidence? I think finding an answer to this question for each individual is a good way to reduce the appearance factor when meeting people.

I wonder how much of that is due to the person simply not giving a ****. Not necessarily very confident but... they just stopped giving a ****. Maybe that is the solution. I should try and report back.

 

[meekthoughts]

I wonder how much of that is due to the person simply not giving a ****. Not necessarily very confident but... they just stopped giving a ****. Maybe that is the solution. I should try and report back.

True, that's another way of thinking about it. I wonder which one is easier to achieve.

 

[VeganAtheist]

True, that's another way of thinking about it. I wonder which one is easier to achieve.

I shall attempt and share my findings.
Tomorrow, not a single **** will be given.

 

[shernia]

I don't think appearance can hold me Back From Meeting People. I am not disfigured, why I am debasing myself.

 

[LonelyClothar]

I don't think appearance can hold me Back From Meeting People. I am not disfigured, why I am debasing myself.

then post a picture of your self?stop trolling, son

 

[jjam]

My problem is attitude. I have a negative attitude about a living situation I should feel greatly positive about, and this attitude inhibits me from attempting to invite people over for company. On some days, I let my attitude about aging warp my perception of my good looks.

 

[lonelyfairy]

Yes, often. Even that I am not overweight anymore, just petite, I feel so awful about myself. Of course I feel much better now, because I have lost so much weight, but... I dont' know... Just feel so ugly. Even that many people have said that I am beautiful, why I don't believe them? People don't say things if they don't mean what they say.

 

[Ak5]

Yes, often. Even that I am not overweight anymore, just petite, I feel so awful about myself. Of course I feel much better now, because I have lost so much weight, but... I dont' know... Just feel so ugly. Even that many people have said that I am beautiful, why I don't believe them? People don't say things if they don't mean what they say.

I sort of have the same thing. I'm not satisfied yet, I still feel like a fat ass at times; even though I'm normal weight!!

 

[Fvantom]

the only way for your appearance to hold you back is if you have a lack of confidence due to not liking the way you look, Ive seen people who would be considered "ugly" (they really arent most of the time) have NO problem talking to people and meeting people, yet theres always those people who look great but hate the way they look and never talk to anyone

 

[VanillaCreme]

Nope. If someone doesn't like what I look like, I just keep on keepin' on. Doesn't bother me if someone doesn't like how I am. I don't expect anyone to change, so why would I ever do it for someone...

 

[VeganAtheist]

I have a feeling that my skin color is holding me back. Some of it is due to my own prejudices to my own 'race'. I don't generally like or identify with people of my own race and I tend to project that onto everyone else -- that they also would not like to identify with me because of how my race is perceived. Of course, I tend to believe, right or wrong, that I very different from most people in my 'race' -- so much so that I should not be considered with them. I try to stay grounded enough as to not extrapolate that 'difference' into some kind of superiority but I don't think I am succeeding in that manner. I have similar thoughts about my gender.

 

[beans]

Nice post, Jason.

However, I find it really tiring that appearance seems to be everything for men. Men are visual and looks are always the first thing they are attracted to. First impression counts, remember? I feel like I've to compete with most of the girls in every social event that I go to because they have better looks than me (and I'm not talking about weight). Usually all the guys will flock to them and seem more interested in them. I'm a little more on the introvert side but I still think I have great humor and I'm really warm and genuine. So why doesn't anyone like me? The only reason I can think of is that I'm not hot. I see all the other hot girls who have not so nice attitudes and still have so many admirers.


I am so tired of always being the girl that nobody pays attention to although I consider myself to be nice and interesting in my own ways. It has come to the point where every function I go, I'd be thinking "Okay where are the pretty girls now?" Because I'm always the least attractive one.