Loneliness is a never ending cycle.

[Wanderer145]

I hate having to partake in events that are destined to repeat themselves. Meet someone new talk to them, they're interested in someone else. Try to change your lifestyle and become an interesting person...nobody gives a flying **** about you still. You try and change it but its a disease it just keeps recurring it just doesnt stop years and years of the same ********. It wears you down so much that you dont care about anyone, and gladly wear the title of a Lone Wolf than open yourself to hurt again. Right now I've had the cycle repeat itself and now I'm wondering why I'm hurting that I've bottled up all my emotions and a lot of alcohol just pushes it all to the surface what I've been supressing for months and boom...same old crap...I honestly never see this ending...I just dont know what to do...thank god I'm going away for 2 weeks abroad might clear my head a little.

 

[kamya]

I feel ya. I've been going through this same cycle a lot. I don't really know what keeps me going anymore. I guess I just try to keep a good attitude. I stay positive and upbeat even if I don't have a reason to act happy other than the hope that things will work out for me some day. That attitude is probably the only reason I'm not homeless on the side of a road somewhere or dead. I honestly have no clue where I am even pulling the energy to keep it together from.

 

[lifestream]

I hope you have a great holiday, Wanderer145.

kamya, maybe you're a stronger person than you give yourself credit for.

 

[ladyforsaken]

Well I can understand how you could feel that way, Wanderer. It's kinda hard to look up to something or hope positively for something when nothing like that ever occurs. I hope the time abroad will help you feel better indeed. Maybe feel renewed enough to keep going with a positive mind ahead. I don't know a better solution. :\

kamya, maybe you're a stronger person than you give yourself credit for.

Kamya is stronger than he gives himself credit for.

 

[Bebeskii]

Hello !
I've been there many times and I remember posted something like that a month ago. The cycle has ended for me. I can really feel and understand that cycle. It is very frustrating and makes you feel sad. Come to Mongolia !. People in here love foreigners a lot. Again they're crazy about them (I'm sorry my fellow Mongolians). It is very true. Everyone will stick to you haha. When I was in that never ending cycle, I went to a church to find people and make friends. At there I decided to keep my faith in Lord God just because of my curiousity what would happen. My life has changed forever. I did not know many great changes would come into my life and I would make many well-mannered good friends. Do you like 'Attack on Titan' ? I love that anime SO MUCH !!!

 

[Musicman]

I can empathize with this... everyone told me that college was going to be so different, I was going to meet new people, forge new friendships, find a girl... but I actually managed to become more isolated, especially since I'm a commuter. What's the worst is that all my old friends seem to be having a blast.

The more I try to meet people, the more I fail... hence the cycle. Part of me wants to give up, but I feel like that will only make it worse.

 

[FPL2014]

Loneliness is no disease.

When you first understand this you overcome a burden.

I'd call a disease the desperate need for the attention of others we see every once in a while then...

A person's attention may or may not be worthwhile, but to escape attention from most people is healthy for the brain.

---

Hello !
I've been there many times and I remember posted something like that a month ago. The cycle has ended for me. I can really feel and understand that cycle. It is very frustrating and makes you feel sad. Come to Mongolia !. People in here love foreigners a lot. Again they're crazy about them (I'm sorry my fellow Mongolians). It is very true. Everyone will stick to you haha. When I was in that never ending cycle, I went to a church to find people and make friends. At there I decided to keep my faith in Lord God just because of my curiousity what would happen. My life has changed forever. I did not know many great changes would come into my life and I would make many well-mannered good friends. Do you like 'Attack on Titan' ? I love that anime SO MUCH !!!

I have heard bout the friendliness of Mongolians before but now you've surprised me.

Nice, nice country. If time and money allow me in the future, I'll sure pay a visit to Mongolia

 

[johnny196775]

i am only interested in meeting people on the internet. Not in real life. I hope that is okay.

 

[LonelySutton]

Yes... I am starting to really wonder about if I should just pack it in and end my search for normalcy. It does me no good at all. People just don't like me. People don't like me looking good, looking bad, a productive employee, a non productive employee... or whatever. I should just accept it and have fun.

 

[jjam]

Do you like 'Attack on Titan' ? I love that anime SO MUCH !!!

Love it and dying to see more! I've only seen all of what's available through Netflix. Any news?

 

[ardour]

I can empathize with this... everyone told me that college was going to be so different, I was going to meet new people, forge new friendships, find a girl... but I actually managed to become more isolated, especially since I'm a commuter. What's the worst is that all my old friends seem to be having a blast.

The more I try to meet people, the more I fail... hence the cycle. Part of me wants to give up, but I feel like that will only make it worse.

You're kind of forced into knowing others at school, but that's just not how it is at College/Uni. Everyone's in their pre-existing friend bubble, turning up to lectures but not bothering to get to know anyone new in the courses. The people stuck in their own racial/ethnic cliques were the worst - how is that not racist? There's the expectation you're going to make friends, that people have matured and what a great opportunity this is.. but the actual instances where you could try and start a conversation with people without looking desperate were so rare. Even the clubs had the cliques of people from the right background, and basically **** off if you weren't. At one stage I went for months where the only non-study conversation I had was with a bus driver.

 

[TheSkaFish]

I hear you. I thought I finally had a hand reach out to me, only for it to turn out to be more of the same old ******** I've always gotten. I'm at the edge of my rope. I'm just can't seem to beat this any way I try.

 

[Yamira]

I don´t know if it´s a never ending cycle... For example: When I go out with my sister, usually all the guys are talking to her, and the fat sister (me) is standing next to them getting ignored. I expect this when I go out with her, so I know whats going to happen. But the last time, I was drinking a little bit, forgot about my problems, was (almost) comfortable with myself and met someone... so it is possible, even if it´s temporary... of course, the people you met will not always be soulmates, some will really be idiots but hey - you can have a nice talk with them.

A lot of times I see people in the suburban train/ bus or whatever where I think "Oh it would be nice to talk to him/ her. Just to see, whats that person like...". But of course, would be creepy if you just walk up to someone like that. But who knows - maybe the other person think the same? so you never know... maybe they have the same issues...

 

[Bebeskii]

Do you like 'Attack on Titan' ? I love that anime SO MUCH !!!

Love it and dying to see more! I've only seen all of what's available through Netflix. Any news?

I watched all the episodes. Yes, same here I'm dying to see more. I don't read manga; I only watch the anime

 

[Pike Creek]

I decided to head back to college a few years ago, because I was lonely. Yes, of course, it's great to have an education and the tuition fees here are dirt cheap so I figured why not? I spent two semesters taking four courses per term...I was nice, said hi to folks, tried to initiate conversations...nothing. Nobody is interested in making new friends at that point, I actually got so discouraged that I gave up my dream for a Masters! How pathetic huh? So I tried internet dating, I met a lot of guys only after ***, but it made me feel less lonely chatting with them. When they realized I didn't want ***, that was the end of that. I did meet my current bf, but honestly? I think I'm with him out of desperation. He doesn't really seem to like me most of the time and I'm just realizing it a year and a half later! I just don't know how to meet people whom I can make friends with....it is a never ending cycle it seems because it was the same with me in high school, then in my work life...the only time I felt needed/wanted by people was when they wanted something out of me.

 

[Wanderer145]

I decided to head back to college a few years ago, because I was lonely. Yes, of course, it's great to have an education and the tuition fees here are dirt cheap so I figured why not? I spent two semesters taking four courses per term...I was nice, said hi to folks, tried to initiate conversations...nothing. Nobody is interested in making new friends at that point, I actually got so discouraged that I gave up my dream for a Masters! How pathetic huh? So I tried internet dating, I met a lot of guys only after ***, but it made me feel less lonely chatting with them. When they realized I didn't want ***, that was the end of that. I did meet my current bf, but honestly? I think I'm with him out of desperation. He doesn't really seem to like me most of the time and I'm just realizing it a year and a half later! I just don't know how to meet people whom I can make friends with....it is a never ending cycle it seems because it was the same with me in high school, then in my work life...the only time I felt needed/wanted by people was when they wanted something out of me.

In some circumstances its better to have someone than be with no one for such a long time. There must be something you see in this person? Have you ever been alone for more than one or two years? It does things to people makes them go a little crazy not having intimacy and that you cannot escape from the need of it, because just going outside down the street you are guaranteed to see it everywhere.

I have tried internet dating and its got me sweet nowhere women just dont want to talk about anything in particular lose interest or never reply. So im planning to give up on that because its become a time sink.

View your experiences as positive and that they're shaping you to find the right kind of people and men to be around. You'll meet better friends as life goes on you'll encounter people you want to be around as they've experienced life enough to know what they are looking for.

 

[Pike Creek]

In some circumstances its better to have someone than be with no one for such a long time. There must be something you see in this person? Have you ever been alone for more than one or two years? It does things to people makes them go a little crazy not having intimacy and that you cannot escape from the need of it, because just going outside down the street you are guaranteed to see it everywhere.

I have tried internet dating and its got me sweet nowhere women just dont want to talk about anything in particular lose interest or never reply. So im planning to give up on that because its become a time sink.

I was alone for over ten years. When I was in my early twenties, I dated quite a bit, but late twenties found me career-oriented and I just didn't take the time nor did I have the desire for intimacy. Now in my 40's I started to feel the need for a boyfriend. And yes, of course I do see lots in him, I fell in love with him, we are going through quite a rough patch and we're both trying to make an effort to make things work.

As for internet dating, I met over 40 men, all ages, in the time frame of about 10 months before stumbling on my current bf. I didn't date all 40, like I mentioned, most were just after casual ***, but I did chat with many and dated a dozen. I found that a lot of the time, people on the internet dating sites are simply there out of boredom, not all of them are seriously looking. You have to go through a lot to find one who is really looking to date and have a relationship, then you have to hope that you click. It was a rough time for me, lots of disappointments and heart break, but overall I would do it again if I was back in the dating pool.

 

[Wanderer145]

In some circumstances its better to have someone than be with no one for such a long time. There must be something you see in this person? Have you ever been alone for more than one or two years? It does things to people makes them go a little crazy not having intimacy and that you cannot escape from the need of it, because just going outside down the street you are guaranteed to see it everywhere.

I have tried internet dating and its got me sweet nowhere women just dont want to talk about anything in particular lose interest or never reply. So im planning to give up on that because its become a time sink.

I was alone for over ten years. When I was in my early twenties, I dated quite a bit, but late twenties found me career-oriented and I just didn't take the time nor did I have the desire for intimacy. Now in my 40's I started to feel the need for a boyfriend. And yes, of course I do see lots in him, I fell in love with him, we are going through quite a rough patch and we're both trying to make an effort to make things work.

As for internet dating, I met over 40 men, all ages, in the time frame of about 10 months before stumbling on my current bf. I didn't date all 40, like I mentioned, most were just after casual ***, but I did chat with many and dated a dozen. I found that a lot of the time, people on the internet dating sites are simply there out of boredom, not all of them are seriously looking. You have to go through a lot to find one who is really looking to date and have a relationship, then you have to hope that you click. It was a rough time for me, lots of disappointments and heart break, but overall I would do it again if I was back in the dating pool.

I'm in my mid 20s and I have had so little success on the dating front...3rd year of singledom...I feel like I should stop chasing it so hard because internet dating has got me nothing, anyone I meet in person through other activities is just plain not interested what so ever...I just cannot believe how hard this is when its so effortless for most others...and the worst thing is I just cannot change it whatever I do. You've had opportunities to meet potential partners at least and found someone. I'm at my wits end with this crap but its like something you want so much you just cannot have its just too much.

There's no clicking there's no interest its like you seriously look at yourself and think what is it thats just not working? I suppose I shouldn't compare everyone man or woman has different experiences with dating...

 

[Pike Creek]

I'm in my mid 20s and I have had so little success on the dating front...3rd year of singledom...I feel like I should stop chasing it so hard because internet dating has got me nothing, anyone I meet in person through other activities is just plain not interested what so ever...I just cannot believe how hard this is when its so effortless for most others...and the worst thing is I just cannot change it whatever I do. You've had opportunities to meet potential partners at least and found someone. I'm at my wits end with this crap but its like something you want so much you just cannot have its just too much.

There's no clicking there's no interest its like you seriously look at yourself and think what is it thats just not working? I suppose I shouldn't compare everyone man or woman has different experiences with dating...

I have heard from many men that they don't find internet dating easy, and I agree that women have an easier time, why? I don't know. I tried 4 different dating sites over that 10 month period and only one was successful for me. I lived close to a major city too, there were lots of people dating and looking; so I had numbers on my side already, and yes, I feel fortunate that I did find someone for sure. Being alone nearly 20 years wasn't fun all the time for me and I'm glad I didn't make it another 20 years alone.

 

[Wanderer145]

I have heard from many men that they don't find internet dating easy, and I agree that women have an easier time, why? I don't know. I tried 4 different dating sites over that 10 month period and only one was successful for me. I lived close to a major city too, there were lots of people dating and looking; so I had numbers on my side already, and yes, I feel fortunate that I did find someone for sure. Being alone nearly 20 years wasn't fun all the time for me and I'm glad I didn't make it another 20 years alone.

You're lucky..as the years roll by its just crushing seeing all your efforts fail..how you did that much time alone...it must have been difficult and I can't imagine that much time alone. I just seem to let the years pass now without being able to change it...weeks, months just fly by...its not so bad being in my mid 20s...im just afraid of the damage it will do when I'm older. I dont want to be alone for another year its just too much, but at the same time I want more people around, I want someone again not anybody....just like almost everyone else has their basic need for a partner fulfilled that I know, I feel like i'm left behind in this regard...and its just annoying to think about.