My enemy is myself

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Didn't you just say that you have a problem thinking for other people? I would think it would be HER decision on whether or not you are good enough for her.
Yes I am quite sure that I said that and what you said made perfect sense to anyone besides me because I look for any reason that may or may not be there from the other person that tells me without words that they are not being sincere with me. I have to tell you that this has proven in the past to be helpful to me but it also has hindered my opportunities too. If I was keeping score I would say I was wrong more than I was right.

Aside from that, is she no longer around? Ask her for lunch or something. Talk to her, get to know her. Stop making excuses and thinking your chance is over. DO something about it.
I don’t know if she is still around because she doesn’t work where I work and if she did I wouldn’t know what to tell her. Gee, I didn’t want to meet you because I thought you were going to reject me and laugh at me. I don’t think that would have gone over too well. Listen, I know you are probably shaking your head right now at my reasoning and you can poke holes into any weak argument that I can come up with but that is what I was thinking about when it happened.
 
Yes I am quite sure that I said that and what you said made perfect sense to anyone besides me because I look for any reason that may or may not be there from the other person that tells me without words that they are not being sincere with me. I have to tell you that this has proven in the past to be helpful to me but it also has hindered my opportunities too. If I was keeping score I would say I was wrong more than I was right.


I don’t know if she is still around because she doesn’t work where I work and if she did I wouldn’t know what to tell her. Gee, I didn’t want to meet you because I thought you were going to reject me and laugh at me. I don’t think that would have gone over too well. Listen, I know you are probably shaking your head right now at my reasoning and you can poke holes into any weak argument that I can come up with but that is what I was thinking about when it happened.

Do you look for reasons or excuses? Sounds more like excuses to me. If you don't try, you can't get hurt. If you pass the blame, even if it's only "well, she's too good for me" or "she'd never want someone like me," you'll never fix your issues and never try. And that, like with most people, is most likely the problem here.

If you want something out of life, you are going to have to take risks. There's no way around that.
 
Do you look for reasons or excuses? Sounds more like excuses to me. If you don't try, you can't get hurt. If you pass the blame, even if it's only "well, she's too good for me" or "she'd never want someone like me," you'll never fix your issues and never try. And that, like with most people, is most likely the problem here.

If you want something out of life, you are going to have to take risks. There's no way around that.

I thought about this before I typed my response and I think I do look for reasons and excuses not to do one thing or another. It's true, if I don't make a step I am not going to get hurt and a lot of times when I come up with a reason or excuse not to do something it is almost like me saying 'well it's not me, it's the other person." I know what the next step is I know the requirements for the next step and I am pretty sure about the positive and negative results is going to be but I'm so used to me saying to myself that something is going to go wrong or something about me is not going to measure up.

You will not get a response out of me that anyway appears to be reasonable, just or correct to contradict what you said about taking risks.

I wish that I can come in here one time and surprise you by doing the opposite thing of what I usually do. Hopefully I can do that next year.
 
iu

Let things fall as they may.

Just think, "What would TheRealCallie do in this situation and do that." Then run like hell when the police are called to take you in.
 
iu

Let things fall as they may.

Just think, "What would TheRealCallie do in this situation and do that." Then run like hell when the police are called to take you in.

I have never been chased by the cops or had them called on me. It's like you don't know me at all. I'm smart enough not to get caught!! lol

Frying_Pan_On_Head.gif

...well, except that one time when I was 18 and got a speeding ticket for going 62 in a 55....would have gotten out of it too, but the cop was training someone and he had to write tickets for everyone or some such bullshit :rolleyes:
 
iu

Let things fall as they may.

I've always liked it when people come in here and post in this thread because it is one of the few ways they make me feel part of things around here. On the other hand I also welcome helpful suggestions and comments that I could use after I leave here. I am not a Nike commercial and to "just do it"is not helpful at all especially when I know what I have to do but lack self-confidence to make that step. Maybe this advice works for you and if it does that's great. If you are trying to be helpful then thank you very much but if you were not the line forms at the left for all the sarcastic people that I have met since I have been here.

Just think, "What would TheRealCallie do in this situation and do that." Then run like hell when the police are called to take you in.

I will not try to explain to you how much respect and admiration I have for her but we are two different people. That woman is a self-assured confident woman And I am a self-conscious person with very little confidence. That being said what she would do and what I would do two completely different things.
 
I'd like to say goodbye to everyone here and that I mostly had a very nice time during my two weeks back.

Thank you my good friend TheRealCallie. I learn something from her every time that I come back here and I think most important thing is that while I remain to this day to be someone who is still an enemy to himself I have to say in all honesty it is not as bad as it was when I first joined here.

It remains to be my wish to be accepted here but maybe I better resort to not hoping for the impossible.

Also I would like to say goodbye to Serenia and I am very happy that I was able to talk with her for a bit before I left. Good luck to you to Amy and I hope you are happy when you are cold (????) and that you and your family have a wonderful year.

I do miss a lot of you. When I leave it is my way of dealing with knowing that most of you don't miss me.

Stay safe, wear your masks and hopefully when the next holiday season gets here it will be a lot better for each and everyone of us.
 
I'd like to say goodbye to everyone here and that I mostly had a very nice time during my two weeks back.

Thank you my good friend TheRealCallie. I learn something from her every time that I come back here and I think most important thing is that while I remain to this day to be someone who is still an enemy to himself I have to say in all honesty it is not as bad as it was when I first joined here.

It remains to be my wish to be accepted here but maybe I better resort to not hoping for the impossible.

Also I would like to say goodbye to Serenia and I am very happy that I was able to talk with her for a bit before I left. Good luck to you to Amy and I hope you are happy when you are cold (????) and that you and your family have a wonderful year.

I do miss a lot of you. When I leave it is my way of dealing with knowing that most of you don't miss me.

Stay safe, wear your masks and hopefully when the next holiday season gets here it will be a lot better for each and everyone of us.
Already???
I thought you'd be around a bit longer...

Well it was nice to talk to you a bit while you were here, wish my timing was better for being online. But if you get bored during the year, don't feel like you have to wait to do a quick check in. Or maybe just pop on discord.

If I don't see you, have a wonderful year. 🙂
 
As another year approaches its conclusion that means I am back for another holiday season so I can spend it with the people in here I consider friends and to let them know that while I may not have been here for a long time I still thought of them.

I know I am going to forget people and if I did it is not intentional. First, to the lady I have my undying respect to, TheRealCallie. She does not mince words with me and that is something I need. No excuse making from her, just the plain honest truth, take it or leave it and I listen to her and that is the mark of a true friend.

I also want to say hi to kaetic, itsmylife, Serenia and AmytheTemperamental. I hope all those ladies are doing fine and they are doing well in their lives away from this forum.

People ask me why are you only here for a few weeks out of the year and then POOF, I’m gone. It’s hard to explain fully but it has a lot to do with not being accepted here when I first joined and given the cold shoulder. Add to that that I am someone who never forgets a slight and there you have it. It is hard to believe when March gets here I will be here for eight years, although when March rolls around I will have been gone again for a few months.

I want to thank the people who have been so kind to me and I won’t forget you
 
Two days back now and I m very happy to re-connect with Callie and kaetic. From what I hear Amy is MIA and i am still looking for Bee and Serenia. I am really hoping I can say hi before the hour glass runs out on my again for another year.
 
What you BELIEVE is lacking is your main problem. You can't see yourself in reality because you think there must be all these flaws, most of which aren't really there are are inconsequential or even emphasized in your head.
You can't do anything about being taller, although, there's nothing wrong with being 5'6. Tom Cruise is only 5'7 and he does okay. You can, however, do something about being thinner if you really want it. The smile, you are probably trying to force it, it's not coming out naturally, so of course it won't look natural to you.
Comparing yourself to others, well, that's a never ending journey, because there will likely always be people you perceive as better than you, but there's also people who are not better than you. In the end, we are all the same, in that we are all different. There are qualities that you have that others don't, and the same goes for the other way around.



You can conquer your shyness, but it will take hard work and putting yourself out of your comfort zone. Try something harder than you usually do, say hi to people, that sort of thing, and it will get easier the more you do it.
As for those girls talking about finding a guy to treat them well, saying that you are one of those means nothing, it's an action kind of thing, they have to SEE it.



These people that insult and/or embarrass you, do they KNOW you? If they don't, what they say means nothing. They insult you because they can see it bothers you, because you seem like an easy target to them and it makes them feel superior over the own honeysuckle they have going on in their own likely messed up life.
What people say about you can't harm you unless you allow it to. Instead of focusing on the insults and what see see wrong with yourself, look for the good, focus on that. Go a week or even a day without judging yourself and see what happens.
Prince was 5’2….. women threw themselves at him. Don’t worry about your height . Women are not that concerned about height as men might think . Other short but popular men - James Brown, Kevin Hart. There are many more I just can’t think of them now. So you don’t have to be tall or cute to be liked by girls. I think having confidence will do, but I know , easier said than done .
 
Prince was 5’2….. women threw themselves at him. Don’t worry about your height . Women are not that concerned about height as men might think . Other short but popular men - James Brown, Kevin Hart. There are many more I just can’t think of them now. So you don’t have to be tall or cute to be liked by girls. I think having confidence will do, but I know , easier said than done .

You are not kidding. Confidence is unattainable by me.
 
I use this thread as an update about myself as to what I have been doing this past year even though I do not ever recall anyone in here besides one person asking me that question so what the hell, I won’t force it on anyone. I won’t assume that no one cares but all signs point to that is how it is.

So I’ll say what I did over 2022 and that will be that. I basically did what everyone else did as I worked a lot, enjoyed my time off by going to movies at the movie theater near me, treated myself to a nice dinner in July when my birthday rolled around and was basically alone for the entire year. I don’t expect people to care about that because I know how things are around here even if the names change. Around here everything is a popularity contest.

I would rather like to stay here year-round like I used to because it was more fun for me that way and I felt more connected to the people here that I like and am fond of. I have to re-establish relationships every time I return in December. At the same time I can not stay for the full year with people that seem to get so much joy out of excluding an individual.

Changing course for a bit I want to talk about how far I see the forum having suffered over the years. I joined here in 2015 and there were so many people posting each day it was hard to keep up with them all. Try to imagine that. Now we only seem to have two people who dominate the posting and frankly it seems that they have nothing interesting to say except to add another post to their total.

When I first got here they had something called a Christmas card exchange where members of the forum would sign up and send Christmas cards to each other. If you think that was a good idea it sure was. It really put smiles on people’s faces in here and it was a fixture when I was a twelve month member and later on when I would pop in like I do in December. I did not see it last year and the last time it seems to have taken place was in 2020. Even though I did not participate for reasons I do not want to go in here I thought this was one of the nicest things I have seen in a public forum. It saddens me that it is no longer here. And no, I can not resurrect it because I only return in late December as I explained.

I have the weekend off and I hope all of you who are in the way of this upcoming storm do not travel if you don’t have to.

Let’s see...I have already had the honor of talking to Callie, who is always a pleasure to see, Kaetic and even Serenia! Serenia always seem to miss each other. I am still looking for Bee. What a nice friend.

Enjoy your holiday wherever you are.
 
Welcome back for the festive season!

(This is AmytheTemperamental)

What did you have for dinner on your birthday?

It hit -52C yesterday here. I imagine your aloha weather is much more inviting 😉
 
Thank you Amy. It is so nice to see you and I hope you are doing well.

My God that is cold. I see in the Celsius to Fahrenheit converter that is -61.6 degrees. How do you handle that?

The weather here is nice and on the news it was reported that Australia is getting warm weather too so if you have forum friends there they will have a green Christmas.

Please please watch out for yourself and I hope you and your family have a wonderful holiday.
 
I know how things are around here even if the names change.
Nope, you assume. You don't know because you aren't here other than for two weeks. That's hardly enough time to determine how things are. And even if you were here year round, why would people want to talk to you when all you do is essentially tell them that they are selfish ******** who don't care about anyone? No, you didn't use those words, but that's what you are implying.
I think I tell you that every year. You will never find anyone else to talk to if you don't give people a chance. So stop assuming what other people are when quite honestly, there are like MAYBE four people still here from when you joined.
 
Oh, I forgot to tell you what I had on my birthday. A seafood dinner. Lobster and mussels.
Awesome! I have both on my "have to try" list for next year. Just hard finding a good seafood place in the middle of the prairies
 
Awesome! I have both on my "have to try" list for next year. Just hard finding a good seafood place in the middle of the prairies

Well, with living in the frozen tundra like you do you may have to wait until the summer. By the way how do you manage living in that cold? Really, it's admirable and scary at the same time.

Nope, you assume. You don't know because you aren't here other than for two weeks. That's hardly enough time to determine how things are. And even if you were here year round, why would people want to talk to you when all you do is essentially tell them that they are selfish ******** who don't care about anyone? No, you didn't use those words, but that's what you are implying.
I think I tell you that every year. You will never find anyone else to talk to if you don't give people a chance. So stop assuming what other people are when quite honestly, there are like MAYBE four people still here from when you joined.


Ok now you may have or rather I should say you make solid points here. But let me tell you what I do when I return here. I first write to you to say hello and then before I start posting I read some threads that I have missed when I was gone. Not all of them of course but some of them to get a feel of what things are like here, kind of like getting the lay of the land so to speak.

I think even you would agree that we see things differently around here. You can handle people a lot better than I can and it was true when I joined and it is true now. Myself on the other hand will draw a line in the sand and I will never forget a slight from someone in here and I am sure you will add even if it is real or imaginative.

So anyway I am reading these threads and some were interesting and some I got out of right away and the first thing I noticed in almost every one of them there were two people who just flooded the forum with posts whether they had anything to do with the thread or not. Now you may say that is not my concern and we agree on this.

I believe I did not ask you this but I will now. If you returned every December for two weeks how would you go about finding anyone to talk to? I come back in here and let people know I am back and you can hear the crickets chirp from everyone, you and some others excluded of course. So how would you handle it or what would be your approach?

I don’t think these people here today are selfish aholes but I understand the meaning of what you said.

Oh, and I must agree that there are only a few people left from when I first got here. What an amazing turnaround. Naturally I do miss a lot of them and there are a lot I wish I never see again.
 

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