Questions for the Men

[Unsigned]

I agree with your post. But Ceno specifically stated that her honest belief is that men are superior. Implying women should be subservient. That I strongly oppose.

Men are superior at some things, and women superior at others.
I see no issue with that at all.
As far as subservience goes, here is an example.
A married couple disagrees about buying a new house.
Both sides make their point and listen to each other, but neither can agree.
Now remember -- they both discussed this rationally and listened to each other.
I this particular case, I believe the wife should defer to the husband (unless she is a "sugar-momma" who married some chippendales ***** -- but in that case I am sure he would not argue). There can only be one captain on the ship. I believe that should be the husband, as men almost always less emotional.

Again though, just IMO.
I don't tell other people how to live.
And for me this is all theoretical. Lifelong single guy here...

 

[Cherubino]

just a few males are needed to perpetuate the species but a lot of females .. this is the source of gentlemanhood ... actually men are just mutant women scientists say ... my clit is average size

 

[TheSkaFish]

I always thought as a woman, if I didn't work then... I'd have to leave, like, if I cant do it then, what use am I? I guess men have so much other uses they dont feel that way. Interesting

Romantic/emotional companionship, for one thing. One thing I've noticed is that the dynamic is different with women than with men, and it's different in a romantic relationship versus a friendship. That's one reason why as a guy if you don't have a romantic relationship, but have male friends, it's nice and all in its own way but something is still missing.

to some people parenthood feels like the only reason we are on this planet. I sometimes think, if its not about reproducing what on earth is it abouttt

It's about whatever you want it to be about.

I'm not being facetious or anything, and if you think having kids is your meaning, that's fine.
I'm just saying, I feel like as sentient beings, we're free to make our own rules and meanings, decide them for ourselves.

That's why I disagree with the whole Darwinian competition, marketplace approach to dating and attraction, and life itself for that matter - I think it's about companionship, living a normal life - not some struggle for survival and dominance. I think modern science and technology, and more civilized, understanding, compassionate attitudes, allow for life to be more than that now, and for that to be the modern standard of living - I thought we evolved past it already, that's why I'm so disappointed to see so many people want to push things back that way, it seems. We know better and we know that life can be kinder, warmer, gentler than it used to be, when we didn't.

 

[user 139760]

Men are superior at some things, and women superior at others.
I see no issue with that at all.
As far as subservience goes, here is an example.
A married couple disagrees about buying a new house.
Both sides make their point and listen to each other, but neither can agree.
Now remember -- they both discussed this rationally and listened to each other.
I this particular case, I believe the wife should defer to the husband (unless she is a "sugar-momma" who married some chippendales ***** -- but in that case I am sure he would not argue). There can only be one captain on the ship. I believe that should be the husband, as men almost always less emotional.

Again though, just IMO.
I don't tell other people how to live.
And for me this is all theoretical. Lifelong single guy here...

Well, let's agree to disagree lol. I'm not about to write a detailed novel, and this could certainly turn into a ten page dissertation, texting on a phone lol. While I see your, even Ceno's line of thinking which isn't the same as yours, I have no wish to text for an hour and go into it.

So you guys just do whatever, I'm finding a Valkyrie and she'll kick both your butts

 

[CenotaphGirl]

Well, let's agree to disagree lol. I'm not about to write a detailed novel, and this could certainly turn into a ten page dissertation, texting on a phone lol. While I see your, even Ceno's line of thinking which isn't the same as yours, I have no wish to text for an hour and go into it.

So you guys just do whatever, I'm finding a Valkyrie and she'll kick both your butts

i love it when you submit to me

Ceno 1 canada 0

 

[Galen]

Ebay comment, was... chef's kiss lol but interesting, to some people parenthood feels like the only reason we are on this planet. I sometimes think, if its not about reproducing what on earth is it abouttt

Thought just occured to me, perhaps set up an online business called, e-baby....

Your observation regarding what's it all about if it's not about reproducing. Well, technically you're pretty much right as it's practically wired into every living organism be it animal or plant to pass on their DNA for fear of extinction of their "blood line." For example, I used to grow chilli plants. One way to get those lazy f##kers to flower was not to water them on a regular basis. By doing so you kind of tricked them into thicking they were going to die to their reaction? - "Quick boys, time to flower up and spread that seed."

However yes, for some parenthood seems to be the be all and end all and some of the **** I've seen regarding the lengths some will go to... well anyway lets not go there. For me however, parenthood is not part of the equation. So in that case, what am I doing on this planet? F##k knows mate. Perhaps it's just a waiting room before I eventually break up into constituent atoms and return to the stars from where I originated from.

 

[user 139760]

i love it when you submit to me

Ceno 1 canada 0

I dodn't submit. I just don't feel like putting in the effort. Besides...it's not a contest of who's right or wrong, kiddo. Matters of opinion rarely are. But I don't feel like exposing my own. I don't care about it enough to put in the effort.
You can feel validated if you want to.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

I dodn't submit. I just don't feel like putting in the effort. Besides...it's not a contest of who's right or wrong, kiddo. Matters of opinion rarely are. But I don't feel like exposing my own. I don't care about it enough to put in the effort.
You can feel validated if you want to.

It was a joke mr Canada I promise I dont actually have a score card your thoughts and feelings are valid sweetie

 

[Finished]

Oooh time for the ultimate test! If you found out you was uhm… serving blank delights, and your partner really wanted to have a baby (just for this scenario imagine you wanted a family with her too you red pillers) would you break up with her? So like she can find someone else..?

I've been fixed for close to 30 years now. I'm still glad I did it. I always told the other person BEFORE we got involved. But, I wouldn't break up with her because of that. If she wanted a different situation then she would need to break up with me. Well, unless she made my life a living hell, which is what one woman did because she NEVER broke up with guys ever and was proud about that. So, she forced me to do it. Ha! ha!

 

[CenotaphGirl]

Hey fellas... now I knowwww this question is going to sound hypercritical coming from me but hear me out!

How should a woman in 2023 go about stopping casual flirtation in the work place from a man that is making her feel uncomfortable? Like if she don't want him fired or anything dramatic but to just respect her as a fellow professional and stop offering her drinks and chocolates and sexy outfits... to list a few? lolz

 

[Ignis]

Hey fellas... now I knowwww this question is going to sound hypercritical coming from me but hear me out!

How should a woman in 2023 go about stopping casual flirtation in the work place from a man that is making her feel uncomfortable? Like if she don't want him fired or anything dramatic but to just respect her as a fellow professional and stop offering her drinks and chocolates and sexy outfits... to list a few? lolz

You need to be forward with them, in the same way they're being forward with you.

Boys are dumb, we can't pick up signals easily when you're not interested

But, when the WORKPLACE gets involved, you REALLY need to be forward about it, especially because things can get pretty messy. Now there's a good way to go about it and a bad way to go about it.
I would probably say something along the lines of "I'm flattered that you think this way, but I would prefer not to date a co-worker and to keep my relationships at work professional."
Saying something like the above works if you are GENERALLY pretty professional at work, but something along that line would work out quite well.

Only issue is that if you DO decide to say that, you kinda lock yourself out of potential dates in the workplace.

You COULD also hit them with the "I'm not interested and would prefer to keep our relationship professional" as well, but workplace stuff can be pretty sensitive and if they take it the wrong way things could end up kinda rough.

First option is how I would approach things with women at work (I personally don't have an issue with dating in the workplace, but a lot of people do so saying something along these lines makes a lot of sense, plus a lot of businesses have a no fraternisation policy) and is how I would recommend women do the same to men in the work place.

It's supposed to be a place for work, not for dating so you're absolutely not going to be in any sort of wrong for telling another co-worker that you want to keep things professional, you just need to stick to it.

 

[NoxApex(N/A)]

Hey fellas... now I knowwww this question is going to sound hypercritical coming from me but hear me out!

How should a woman in 2023 go about stopping casual flirtation in the work place from a man that is making her feel uncomfortable? Like if she don't want him fired or anything dramatic but to just respect her as a fellow professional and stop offering her drinks and chocolates and sexy outfits... to list a few? lolz

Good morning Ceno.
I was just thinking about you. I appreciate my A.M. questions, was kinda hoping you'd have some.

I lightheartedly flirt with my staff. I never text them over the weekend though, or if I do it's about work specifically. Schedule changes, if they have an item or two on hold for themselves, that kind of a thing. I always assume that if they get uncomfortable they'll just tell me to **** off and in the words of comedian Bill Connelly "off he will ****."

I would like to think that most guys would be able to handle a direct rejection without it being an issue the way that I can but I guess with incels apparently not?

Just point blank directly tell him that you're not interested in seeing him that way.
If it persists, talk to your manager privately about it and request a shift change so you don't have to work together on the same shift.
That's happened a couple times with me and other men in the past. I've switched out to work with the girl because the guy couldn't handle a No.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

You need to be forward with them, in the same way they're being forward with you.

Boys are dumb, we can't pick up signals easily when you're not interested

But, when the WORKPLACE gets involved, you REALLY need to be forward about it, especially because things can get pretty messy. Now there's a good way to go about it and a bad way to go about it.
I would probably say something along the lines of "I'm flattered that you think this way, but I would prefer not to date a co-worker and to keep my relationships at work professional."
Saying something like the above works if you are GENERALLY pretty professional at work, but something along that line would work out quite well.

Only issue is that if you DO decide to say that, you kinda lock yourself out of potential dates in the workplace.

You COULD also hit them with the "I'm not interested and would prefer to keep our relationship professional" as well, but workplace stuff can be pretty sensitive and if they take it the wrong way things could end up kinda rough.

First option is how I would approach things with women at work (I personally don't have an issue with dating in the workplace, but a lot of people do so saying something along these lines makes a lot of sense, plus a lot of businesses have a no fraternisation policy) and is how I would recommend women do the same to men in the work place.

It's supposed to be a place for work, not for dating so you're absolutely not going to be in any sort of wrong for telling another co-worker that you want to keep things professional, you just need to stick to it.

Like the thing with me is I am a flirtatious person, I do it on accident mostly, some guys are like "wow didnt know you saw me like that" after a convo and I think... Ugh Cenny stop flirting Jesus Christ lol I also have the added thing that almost anything I say is taken as flirting maybe it's my voice? Idk... but I do know my sense of humour leans on the teasing/flirtaious side. I genuinely think its a default setting, no idea why. I realise that I am always going to find myself in this position because my personality, until I figure out how to change that behaviour which is why I wouldn't want anyone to get fired.

But here's my issue, men that I dont playfully tease, overhear me playfully teasing and these are the men that just... take everything a bit too far and just wanna aggressively come on to me, (happens to me everywhere, even on here, where people haven't seen me breathing lol)

context? I have been out of work for over a month, slowly getting reintroduced to just help with registers as I recover from many issues. So I work in counselling but I am mostly doing a bit of admin instead of helping clients. What has happened is, many people sent me chocolates and sweets and get well cards and flowers whilst I was in hospital. Most people have let me try to settle back in, but one guy.... his pursuit of me is intense and he knows im just out of hospital and I think thats making it worse if I am honest. I thought being virtual would help, and I said okay I will record the meeting... that stopped nothing, now I could send the recording to higher ups but is that right? He could get fired, is that too harsh?

 

[CenotaphGirl]

Good morning Ceno.
I was just thinking about you. I appreciate my A.M. questions, was kinda hoping you'd have some.

I lightheartedly flirt with my staff. I never text them over the weekend though, or if I do it's about work specifically. Schedule changes, if they have an item or two on hold for themselves, that kind of a thing. I always assume that if they get uncomfortable they'll just tell me to **** off and in the words of comedian Bill Connelly "off he will ****."

I would like to think that most guys would be able to handle a direct rejection without it being an issue the way that I can but I guess with incels apparently not?

Just point blank directly tell him that you're not interested in seeing him that way.
If it persists, talk to your manager privately about it and request a shift change so you don't have to work together on the same shift.
That's happened a couple times with me and other men in the past. I've switched out to work with the girl because the guy couldn't handle a No.

Fancy seeing a man like you in a place like this!

Men I need better advice than be direct! Every time I have been direct with a guy, we've... ended up on a date together because they literally almost scared me into it they became that enraged. Help princess Ceno... being direct never works for me, I am going to start posting texts here so you guys can see what I am dealing withhh

 

[Ignis]

Like the thing with me is I am a flirtatious person, I do it on accident mostly, some guys are like "wow didnt know you saw me like that" after a convo and I think... Ugh Cenny stop flirting Jesus Christ lol I also have the added thing that almost anything I say is taken as flirting maybe it's my voice? Idk... but I do know my sense of humour leans on the teasing/flirtaious side. I genuinely think its a default setting, no idea why. I realise that I am always going to find myself in this position because my personality, until I figure out how to change that behaviour which is why I wouldn't want anyone to get fired.

But here's my issue, men that I dont playfully tease, overhear me playfully teasing and these are the men that just... take everything a bit too far and just wanna aggressively come on to me, (happens to me everywhere, even on here, where people haven't seen me breathing lol)

context? I have been out of work for over a month, slowly getting reintroduced to just help with registers as I recover from many issues. So I work in counselling but I am mostly doing a bit of admin instead of helping clients. What has happened is, many people sent me chocolates and sweets and get well cards and flowers whilst I was in hospital. Most people have let me try to settle back in, but one guy.... his pursuit of me is intense and he knows im just out of hospital and I think thats making it worse if I am honest. I thought being virtual would help, and I said okay I will record the meeting... that stopped nothing, now I could send the recording to higher ups but is that right? He could get fired, is that too harsh?

Flirtatious person... That's... Unfortunate in this situation.

Still, my advice stands, you should absolutely be very forward with him and say that you're not interested in pursuing anything with him in a workplace, unfortunately you can't just go full scorched earth, since you work together (Well, I guess you CAN go full scorched earth and not be tactful if you want, but there may be repurcussions for it. Even if you're very forward and put your foot down saying that it's just a professional relationship, he may still go down the route of vengefulness, but by that point you can escalate it to higher ups and they'll likely be reprimanded for it.)

Now I will say, if you're concerned about approaching them directly, then the next course of action is to probably go to your boss.
There is a third option where if the two of you have a mutual work friend you could ask them to do you a solid, but that's not necessarily going to work.

Bear in mind that if you DO decide to go to your boss (Which if things are getting very intense, could be approaching workplace harrassment or sexual harrassment then you would absolutely be correct in doing so) is very likely going to tank your relationship with this guy. Because if your boss does the right thing (And if he doesn't, you go to someone who will, by the by) it's going to be a very stern conversation.

If he gets fired for doing what he was doing, then he REALLY probably shouldn't have been doing it. Flirting with someone in the workplace is probably not grounds to get you fired, it's enough for someone to have a conversation with you. If you're getting TERMINATED? God damn, what the hell were you doing? Trying to steal her kidney or something?

 

[NoxApex(N/A)]

Fancy seeing a man like you in a place like this!

Men I need better advice than be direct! Every time I have been direct with a guy, we've... ended up on a date together because they literally almost scared me into it they became that enraged. Help princess Ceno... being direct never works for me, I am going to start posting texts here so you guys can see what I am dealing withhh

Yeah see that's part of how I get away with it: I don't really text my staff outside of work or work-related reasons.
So it really is just me being playful and fun. I know these women don't want me, I don't push like they do.
I can admit that I've had a crush on pretty much all of them at one point or another in the years I've worked there, bbbuuuttttt for me: Work is work and my personal life is my personal life.
It'd be one thing if I wasn't in Management, but I'm fully aware of how that can look, seem, and go. So, I don't push it.

Why it's so hard to just take an L for some dudes, IDK.
I eat L's for breakfast. That **** don't bother me none.

But yeah, just switch your schedule up if need be with your manager.

I'm curious, what is your day job, anyhow? Like what field are you in professionally?

 

[CenotaphGirl]

Flirtatious person... That's... Unfortunate in this situation.

Still, my advice stands, you should absolutely be very forward with him and say that you're not interested in pursuing anything with him in a workplace, unfortunately you can't just go full scorched earth, since you work together (Well, I guess you CAN go full scorched earth and not be tactful if you want, but there may be repurcussions for it. Even if you're very forward and put your foot down saying that it's just a professional relationship, he may still go down the route of vengefulness, but by that point you can escalate it to higher ups and they'll likely be reprimanded for it.)

Now I will say, if you're concerned about approaching them directly, then the next course of action is to probably go to your boss.
There is a third option where if the two of you have a mutual work friend you could ask them to do you a solid, but that's not necessarily going to work.

Bear in mind that if you DO decide to go to your boss (Which if things are getting very intense, could be approaching workplace harrassment or sexual harrassment then you would absolutely be correct in doing so) is very likely going to tank your relationship with this guy. Because if your boss does the right thing (And if he doesn't, you go to someone who will, by the by) it's going to be a very stern conversation.

If he gets fired for doing what he was doing, then he REALLY probably shouldn't have been doing it. Flirting with someone in the workplace is probably not grounds to get you fired, it's enough for someone to have a conversation with you. If you're getting TERMINATED? God damn, what the hell were you doing? Trying to steal her kidney or something?

Not sure where you are from but the UK has a deffo overcorrection problem when it comes to this, so many men have been fired and almost blacklisted for simple flirting, but how can you get them to just stop!!

Some examples of what he said on this recording was

Me: Okay, can you see I am sharing my screen?
Him: No I can only see you, not that I mind seeing you, what a view actually...

Like honestly men, what am I supposed to say to that?

Me: Okay, the RECORDING is on, and the screens are shared, everything is ready for us to commence with the case list.

Him: Oh no, work time, yes I can see your screen and my beautiful view is gone.

Then every time I offered to do something for him (aka my job at current) he was like

I need to take you out, I need to treat you, you are so good, you are so good to me, wow, what a superstar you are, have fun with the boyfriend over the weekend?

Yeah see that's part of how I get away with it: I don't really text my staff outside of work or work-related reasons.
So it really is just me being playful and fun. I know these women don't want me, I don't push like they do.
I can admit that I've had a crush on pretty much all of them at one point or another in the years I've worked there, bbbuuuttttt for me: Work is work and my personal life is my personal life.
It'd be one thing if I wasn't in Management, but I'm fully aware of how that can look, seem, and go. So, I don't push it.

Why it's so hard to just take an L for some dudes, IDK.
I eat L's for breakfast. That **** don't bother me none.

But yeah, just switch your schedule up if need be with your manager.

I'm curious, what is your day job, anyhow? Like what field are you in professionally?

I work in grief counselling, but at the moment I am not allowed to work directly with clients so I fix up the case lists and attend meetings, draft safety plans blah blah blah. So it involves having to talk to this guy very often.

 

[NoxApex(N/A)]

I work in grief counselling, but at the moment I am not allowed to work directly with clients so I fix up the case lists and attend meetings, draft safety plans blah blah blah. So it involves having to talk to this guy very often.

Ooohh no, Ceno.
I'm sorry. That must be terribly complicated.
What a sad environment. Why a guy would think to try to pick up chick in that environment I-- Oh.
Ooohh.
God, that's ****** up.
Yeah, stay away from that dude.
You got mace or anything?

 

[Ignis]

Not sure where you are from but the UK has a deffo overcorrection problem when it comes to this, so many men have been fired and almost blacklisted for simple flirting, but how can you get them to just stop!!

Some examples of what he said on this recording was

Me: Okay, can you see I am sharing my screen?
Him: No I can only see you, not that I mind seeing you, what a view actually...

Like honestly men, what am I supposed to say to that?

Me: Okay, the RECORDING is on, and the screens are shared, everything is ready for us to commence with the case list.

Him: Oh no, work time, yes I can see your screen and my beautiful view is gone.

Then every time I offered to do something for him (aka my job at current) he was like

I need to take you out, I need to treat you, you are so good, you are so good to me, wow, what a superstar you are, have fun with the boyfriend over the weekend?

Go to your boss. This is way worse than what I was thinking, this is almost textbook sexual harassment. Doubly so if you've even hinted at telling him to back off and he hasn't done so.

It's not going to end well between you and him going to the boss and he's probably gonna say something along the lines of 'Well why didn't you just come and tell me, I probably would have backed off?' when he may very well not have and that's the problem and reason you had to do it.

If he gets terminated for it, I wouldn't feel too bad. Even when I've DATED someone in the workplace I wouldn't be this direct with them in person

 

[Cherubino]

it's because you wear provocative outfits ... for the avatar