Questions for the Men

[Galen]

Oooh time for the ultimate test! If you found out you was uhm… serving blank delights, and your partner really wanted to have a baby (just for this scenario imagine you wanted a family with her too you red pillers) would you break up with her? So like she can find someone else..?

If the main foundations of the relationship was just to produce a baby, then that's not what I would call a particularly sound relationship. Need I say it that ideally, each partner should be comfortably happy in sharing their lives in long term with each other. Though yes, bringing a baby together in this world could cement the strength of the relationship. However, not being able to do so due to reasons pertaining to one or both partners can admittedly in some cases lead tension to build up between them. If that's the case, then yeah maybe bailing maybe an option. However, perhaps at least consider other options such as adoption, fostering, artificial insemination, surrogacy, or hell man even see what's available on ebay.

 

[Cherubino]

you mean to break up with her by my own initiative so that not trigger her feelings of guilt? ... I think this is more of an ultimate test for her more than me ... it's her decision and it's a tough one, to be the broken part has its advantages too

 

[NoxApex(N/A)]

Oooh time for the ultimate test! If you found out you was uhm… serving blank delights, and your partner really wanted to have a baby (just for this scenario imagine you wanted a family with her too you red pillers) would you break up with her? So like she can find someone else..?

This is one of the instances in which I'd opt for a poly relationship, since I wouldn't want kids but she does.

My only staples to it being:
1.) Don't hang me with his kid.
2.) Separate places for happy fun time, because I don't wanna come home to that after work.

Otherwise, I don't really care.
I can downshift a relationship as easily as I can double down on a relationship. It's all a matter of finding the functional, happy middle ground.



I can't imagine wanting a family, really.
But I can imagine an accommodating poly relationship in which I'm equally committed however less emotionally invested.

 

[user 139760]

Oooh time for the ultimate test! If you found out you was uhm… serving blank delights, and your partner really wanted to have a baby (just for this scenario imagine you wanted a family with her too you red pillers) would you break up with her? So like she can find someone else..?

Well, I'd like to think we'd explore other solutions instead of just breaking up. There's always adoption and honestly, lots more children uncared for than having to necessarily bring a new one into the world.
Though in my case, that's probably long done. I always wanted a son, but I don't think I'm young enough, or patient enough, to have small children running around anymore. Children in general in recent years tend to leave a bittersweet taste in my mouth.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

Well, if we'd been happy up to the point where starting a family became our main issue I think that instead of immediately choosing to part ways with her, I'd suggest that we discuss alternate options available to us.

Maybe adoption would be one or artificial insemination another. There's no guarantee that we'll stay together, with or without children. Couples and families break apart every day, sadly. But if my being unable to impregnate her was unacceptable for our relationship to continue from HER point of view alone, then I'd say yes, break up as we weren't very well matched.

But having children shouldn't be the only basis for the survival of a relationship, in my personal opinion. Too many people, myself included, were screwed into existence rather than being lovingly welcomed upon their arrival. And having a child is a lifelong ordeal, both theirs and yours. They're young for a good many years but they remain your children forever. Think about what you want now as compared to what you may want, somewhere down the line. Every child deserves love.

Wow you men are so interesting, I always thought as a woman, if I didn't work then... I'd have to leave, like, if I cant do it then, what use am I? I guess men have so much other uses they dont feel that way. Interesting

If the main foundations of the relationship was just to produce a baby, then that's not what I would call a particularly sound relationship. Need I say it that ideally, each partner should be comfortably happy in sharing their lives in long term with each other. Though yes, bringing a baby together in this world could cement the strength of the relationship. However, not being able to do so due to reasons pertaining to one or both partners can admittedly in some cases lead tension to build up between them. If that's the case, then yeah maybe bailing maybe an option. However, perhaps at least consider other options such as adoption, fostering, artificial insemination, surrogacy, or hell man even see what's available on ebay.

Ebay comment, was... chef's kiss lol but interesting, to some people parenthood feels like the only reason we are on this planet. I sometimes think, if its not about reproducing what on earth is it abouttt

you mean to break up with her by my own initiative so that not trigger her feelings of guilt? ... I think this is more of an ultimate test for her more than me ... it's her decision and it's a tough one, to be the broken part has its advantages too

I like how you make it her decision, it's strange as I would consider it my decision if it was the other way, and I would tell him to go fourth and multiply!

This is one of the instances in which I'd opt for a poly relationship, since I wouldn't want kids but she does.

My only staples to it being:
1.) Don't hang me with his kid.
2.) Separate places for happy fun time, because I don't wanna come home to that after work.

Otherwise, I don't really care.
I can downshift a relationship as easily as I can double down on a relationship. It's all a matter of finding the functional, happy middle ground.



I can't imagine wanting a family, really.
But I can imagine an accommodating poly relationship in which I'm equally committed however less emotionally invested.

Apex... wanna be in a poly? See now if I said this, mr Canada would beat me up lolz (joking joking)

Well, I'd like to think we'd explore other solutions instead of just breaking up. There's always adoption and honestly, lots more children uncared for than having to necessarily bring a new one into the world.
Though in my case, that's probably long done. I always wanted a son, but I don't think I'm young enough, or patient enough, to have small children running around anymore. Children in general in recent years tend to leave a bittersweet taste in my mouth.

Wow, we have something in common! I've always wanted a son, I know I will have a son, and only a son one day, I just see it in my future, and I want him to be a boxer

 

[NoxApex(N/A)]

Apex... wanna be in a poly? See now if I said this, mr Canada would beat me up lolz (joking joking)

Cen, I'm 34, I have no money, my life is a wreck, and I'm on the other side of the planet.
First I gotta figure out how to be poly-dimensional, so I can be over there.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

Cen, I'm 34, I have no money, my life is a wreck, and I'm on the other side of the planet.
First I gotta figure out how to be poly-dimensional, so I can be over there.

Dont you feel like being 34 is a mans golden years? Like... when they are the happiest or is that YouTube frying my brain again?

 

[NoxApex(N/A)]

Dont you feel like being 34 is a mans golden years? Like... when they are the happiest or is that YouTube frying my brain again?

It depends on how they live their lives between 20 and 30.
This is what makes life so interesting, is this specific time period:
Because no two people can ever live exactly the same way in this time period.
Algorithms can make people similar enough to bump into each other, but everyone is unique in this growth period.

What I spent my time on was a great deal of studying as a hobby, running my own research and development, and putting things to the test for myself that I could to draw conclusions for myself where I could and when I could. The trouble is that there's not really a way I can turn that into a source of income without requiring a college degree that I don't have. So...

I pursued turning my hobby into a career and found out that it's not what I wanted for my future.
I've had 3 or 4 different cars, 3 or 4 different apartments, been through 35/50 states, over to Morocco, Algeria, France, and back to Florida.

I did most of what I wanted to do with my life already within practical reason.
When you grow up poor like I did, if you want to get the best out of life, you learn to appreciate practicality more than hopes and dreams.

What I did, was create memories for myself while I had the energy and resources to do it when I was younger. Which I now mostly live in or with, inside my head.

 

[Cherubino]

"I like how you make it her decision, it's strange as I would consider it my decision if it was the other way, and I would tell him to go fourth and multiply!"

according to my structure it would be a far more easier decision for her to tell me "it's your natural right to fulfill your need, go find someone else" than for me to tell her "we have to break up cause my need to have a child is rightful and stronger than anything" ... and you can think of a tougher situation, what if it occurs that one of the partners can't perform (penetrative) sex for the rest of their life

 

[CenotaphGirl]

It depends on how they live their lives between 20 and 30.
This is what makes life so interesting, is this specific time period:
Because no two people can ever live exactly the same way in this time period.
Algorithms can make people similar enough to bump into each other, but everyone is unique in this growth period.

What I spent my time on was a great deal of studying as a hobby, running my own research and development, and putting things to the test for myself that I could to draw conclusions for myself where I could and when I could. The trouble is that there's not really a way I can turn that into a source of income without requiring a college degree that I don't have. So...

I pursued turning my hobby into a career and found out that it's not what I wanted for my future.
I've had 3 or 4 different cars, 3 or 4 different apartments, been through 35/50 states, over to Morocco, Algeria, France, and back to Florida.

I did most of what I wanted to do with my life already within practical reason.
When you grow up poor like I did, if you want to get the best out of life, you learn to appreciate practicality more than hopes and dreams.

What I did, was create memories for myself while I had the energy and resources to do it when I was younger. Which I now mostly live in or with, inside my head.

Jheez I hated Morocco, really needed a man lol It's like no man no safety over there... in my opinion... But it sounds like you worked hard and enjoyed yourself! Do you feel old now? Like... slower and just want to relax more?

"I like how you make it her decision, it's strange as I would consider it my decision if it was the other way, and I would tell him to go fourth and multiply!"

according to my structure it would be a far more easier decision for her to tell me "it's your natural right to fulfill your need, go find someone else" than for me to tell her "we have to break up cause my need to have a child is rightful and stronger than anything" ... and you can think of a tougher situation, what if it occurs that one of the partners can't perform (penetrative) sex for the rest of their life

See to me thats not tough... kids are way tougher because thats like legacy, I cant imagine even feeling half fulfilled on my deathbed without producing someone... something... to live on... sex... well... things happen, you discuss a plan with your partner and you move forward together.

 

[NoxApex(N/A)]

Jheez I hated Morocco, really needed a man lol It's like no man no safety over there... in my opinion... But it sounds like you worked hard and enjoyed yourself! Do you feel old now? Like... slower and just want to relax more?

My out of country trips were a gift.
I had a childhood friend at the time, he has wealthy family over in Algeria from his father's side of the family, who have friends in Morocco.
In my teens I became noticeably more mentally unstable than my peers and was hospitalized.
After I got out, a few years later, in an effort to try to help bring life back into me, his father wanted to give me the chance to see the world of possibilities. So he took me on that trip for about 3 months, nearly all of Summer break.

 

[Cherubino]

See to me thats not tough... kids are way tougher because thats like legacy, I cant imagine even feeling half fulfilled on my deathbed without producing someone... something... to live on... sex... well... things happen, you discuss a plan with your partner and you move forward together.

it's your natural right for sure, it's all about the hierarchy of values everyone has inside ... for me having a (natural) child is not a duty but loyalty is ... I'm not religious but even the Bible's command "Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it" is addressed to the human kind as a specie while the moral commands are addressed to every individual (soul) ... and child adoption can be an alternative too (as with the sex plan)

 

[user 139760]

Wow you men are so interesting, I always thought as a woman, if I didn't work then... I'd have to leave, like, if I cant do it then, what use am I? I guess men have so much other uses they dont feel that way. Interesting


Ebay comment, was... chef's kiss lol but interesting, to some people parenthood feels like the only reason we are on this planet. I sometimes think, if its not about reproducing what on earth is it abouttt


I like how you make it her decision, it's strange as I would consider it my decision if it was the other way, and I would tell him to go fourth and multiply!



Apex... wanna be in a poly? See now if I said this, mr Canada would beat me up lolz (joking joking)



Wow, we have something in common! I've always wanted a son, I know I will have a son, and only a son one day, I just see it in my future, and I want him to be a boxer

I don't beat women up.
Not enough challenge. Especially not you, it'd be harder to beat up a coat on a hanger

 

[Unsigned]

that's almost a 50's mindset.

And I, for one, think that's a damn good mindset...

 

[CenotaphGirl]

And I, for one, think that's a damn good mindset...

Its just no one else thinks that anymore but the new way is not working everyone is alone and depressed and suicidal.

If not then they are bitter or in rare occasions happy alone …

 

[user 139760]

And I, for one, think that's a damn good mindset...

I don't. But to each his own. I certainly wouldn't want my two daughters developing this kind of submissive and baseless mindset that "a man is better than they are". It's factually incorrect on so many levels, I'm not even going into it in detail.
Suffice it to say, society might not be perfect, but I doubt it would be served well by negating 70 years of women's lib. Maybe 10. But not 70.

 

[Unsigned]

no one else thinks that anymore

Some people do.
I think things were much better when males & females worked together using each others strengths rather than competing.
Like the pioneer husband pulling the plow while the wife holds it steady.

My favorite female movie character of all time is Co Bao (played by Julia Nixon) in Rambo First Blood Part 2.
She never argued with Rambo or tried to demean him.
Rather she recognized his experience & leadership, and when he told he to jump off the boat, even though she wanted to stay & fight, she did it. Then when it looked hopeless and the Russians were torturing Rambo, she came back using her special feminine skills to save him. Was a very sad scene when she died.

 

[Unsigned]

I don't. But to each his own. I certainly wouldn't want my two daughters developing this kind of submissive and baseless mindset that "a man is better than they are". It's factually incorrect on so many levels, I'm not even going into it in detail.
Suffice it to say, society might not be perfect, but I doubt it would be served well by negating 70 years of women's lib. Maybe 10. But not 70.

IMO, it has nothing to do with better.
Just different.
See my above post.

 

[user 139760]

IMO, it has nothing to do with better.
Just different.
See my above post.

I agree with your post. But Ceno specifically stated that her honest belief is that men are superior. Implying women should be subservient. That I strongly oppose.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

I agree with your post. But Ceno specifically stated that her honest belief is that men are superior. Implying women should be subservient. That I strongly oppose.

I said thattt… must have been thinking out loud Men are “superior” than we are, theres nothing baseless about it… we can choose to be submissive, but that “choice” is afforded to us by men. Its simple, logical, not opinion based nonsense. But if you say thank you, show them respect for choosing to be decent humans, you are a bad woman, they should just protect us, but honestly, why should they? No one protects them…

We should appreciate their humanity… honestly. Their lives laid on the line in countless wars to keep women and children safe, the men who gave up their lifes on the titanic (for example) to keep women and children safe.

They dont owe it to us, they owe us nothing. But we look to them for help and even if its their job, its still men… its still a man, I don't even usually like most men but I respect what they do for me, and I am “woman enough” to admit… I cant do it too and wouldnt trust any other woman could do it.