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It was a blatant lie, but to hell with it...I don't feel like going out and even less like explaining my isolationism.
 
Preparing to lug my wares into the big city on Friday for the huge convention this weekend. Hope I will make a nice chunk of change selling to buyers.
 
I hate that I am feeling like this again. All I can figure out is I am the common denomantor. Just not good enough.
 
If you knew, if you experienced even a portion of the blood, sweat, tears, depression, sleepless nights, the fear and the anxiety, the overwhelming weight of responsibility, you would not find it so easy to toss around that title. It is earned, it is an honour, and a privilege. Don't mock them for their tears when they heard the news; as smart a girl as she is, she has done nothing so far to deserve it and yet she has been rewarded for what she has not achieved. Perhaps it is out of ignorance or worse, a refusal to understand, that you malign anyone who points this out, even though she herself understands this perspective.
Hers was already a life of privilege, while theirs was quite to the contrary. This is a trivial issue in the long term scheme of things, but to the others whose lives would have been made vastly different if things had gone another way, it is important.
 
I am not sure what has changed, maybe it is the nice weather, but feel a better handle each day.
 
I'm feeling slightly amused and a little irritated. They need to know better than to play matchmaker. I am a little suprised it took them this long though. I've been in the country a couple of months already. I hope this will be the last time.
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I wish I could go there, but the anxiety today is overwhelming.
 
I woke feeling down again this morning. Why? I have no idea. At least it is no where near as bad as before. Just ploughing ahead.
 
TheSkaFish said:
whatever, not like venting about this will change anything.

Won't change anything but might just help lighten things up a bit for you.

Vent away, my friend.
 
ladyforsaken said:
TheSkaFish said:
whatever, not like venting about this will change anything.

Won't change anything but might just help lighten things up a bit for you.

Vent away, my friend.

It's okay, my need to vent, and the mood I was in have passed. But thank you anyway for telling me it's okay to speak my mind. Makes me happy to see that.
 
So so so pissed off that this ******* weather messed up my weekend plans... I've been looking forward to it for weeks... guess it's gonna be another long weekend wasted alone :mad:
 

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