Thinking that tomorrow's my birthday, and between my dog not doing well, the girl I love going from talking to me all the time to whatever we have completely broken down, and everything else that's happened, I don't much feel like celebrating.
I just want to stop feeling like I'm getting rained on every single day. When the hell is this going to end, seriously. When the hell am I going to stop getting screwed around by life time and time again and start getting somewhere that I actually want. I just wish I could count down the days until things would start working out for me, or I knew what I had to do to get my life to shift to something other than being dumped on day in and day out. I can't take much more of this. I need something better to look forward to, I need to know it's going to get better some day. It's starting to really drive me over the edge.
I feel like I had my chances for happiness, I had ample time to set myself up for a good life, and now that time has passed - my time has passed, and I'm just stuck with what's left. This is as good as it's going to get, it's terrible, and there's nothing I can do about it except watch helplessly.
I'm just so tired of losing.