I have been thinking about it and I don't think I can be friends with that person. Though since the break we have been cordial in our few interactions, I just can't go without feeling ******* worthless even when I am so much as reminded of her existence.
I am considering deleting the person from facebook and setting it so that she cannot find me in searches. Though I wish her well, I also wish to never see her again. This is bad because most of my friends I know through her and if I hung out with them she would certainly be there.
It does not matter. This is not the first time I have known loneliness and I will try my best to endure the isolation that is surely to come. I am going to have to start over again from nothing and pick up what is left of my self esteem.
God ****, I hate her.
I see now she only really went with me because she was lonely, was rejected by the people she really wanted, and wanted to do what society expected of her. I have nothing against homosexuals, but I very much have something against her for stringing me along for so many years. To hell with her and all that she is.