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if that is from your own artistic writing you sir have a great talent :)

if it's from a song I have never heard it
Hello Bam, since I posted that song for you I've been listening to some of the other stuff we recorded. I've kinda realised the reason I didn't listen to it for so long was because the way it ended was so painful.

This is something I should have said, to someone very special a long time ago because now she's gone and it's too late.

I just felt the need to say it somewhere.
 
Hello Bam, since I posted that song for you I've been listening to some of the other stuff we recorded. I've kinda realised the reason I didn't listen to it for so long was because the way it ended was so painful.

This is something I should have said, to someone very special a long time ago because now she's gone and it's too late.

I just felt the need to say it somewhere.
Why couldn’t you tell her now?
 
Hello Bam, since I posted that song for you I've been listening to some of the other stuff we recorded. I've kinda realised the reason I didn't listen to it for so long was because the way it ended was so painful.

This is something I should have said, to someone very special a long time ago because now she's gone and it's too late.

I just felt the need to say it somewhere.
I feel bad was those some of the lyrics that were in a song you posted in my thread sorry I have been listening to a lot of music today I will go back and relisten to the song so that way I can remember.

I'm sorry that you feel this way, I know the feeling of regret to tell someone I cared for that I didn't want to let them go. But she was apart from me and dying from loneliness I loved her so much; I wanted her to be happy she has a child now and a husband. Sometimes I feel it hurts but we are best friends and still talk to this day, she is a great person, and I am truly happy for her, though sometimes I feel a bit selfish for wanting her, I don't want to ask your situation not my business, but I hope that you will be happy and that this feeling will pass for you, my friend. have a wonderful day I won't Hijack the thread sorry lol
 
oops sorry. I guess I did it again. I wasn’t trying to hijack or get in your business. It just reminded me of a situation with myself. I tend to say the wrong things a good bit.
 
Why couldn’t you tell her now?
She passed away last year, she was an awesome human being and a fantastic singer. She settled for a life she didn't want because of her experiences with me ... I think.

Anyways back to business as usual, nothing to see here. :)
 
The night you ran off in the rain I caught you up, I tried to explain.
I will admit it I was four sheets to the wind but to break your heart was never my intention.
I forgiveee youuu 🥹 How I wish a certain someone wrote this to me… but noooo too prouddd *cough* Ardour *cough* I joke I jokeee
 
I’m thinking about my mammogram in the morning, what I call “the **** squish” and a song stuck in my head from a TV show I watched the other day. The song is Far From Any Road by the Handsome Family.
 
She passed away last year, she was an awesome human being and a fantastic singer. She settled for a life she didn't want because of her experiences with me ... I think.

Anyways back to business as usual, nothing to see here. :)
Wow. And this is further proof I’m a ********. I apologize
 
I’m thinking about my mammogram in the morning, what I call “the **** squish” and a song stuck in my head from a TV show I watched the other day. The song is Far From Any Road by the Handsome Family.
Last one I had they didn’t have to do all that squishing. It wasn’t that bad actually.
 
I am thinking about something I often think about, though it does tend to result in circular thinking. Is part of being lonely a result of mixed messages or does it stem from our duality? From what I understand, man is a social creature, and that is part of our DNA. But also, since there is so much hostility afloat these days in various situations, can one blame anyone who withdraws? I guess it might be a question of balance (not to appropriate an album title from the Moody Blues), but finding that balance has been a lifelong struggle for me. I was a total outcast in school and though I am close to 60, that also still factors in. It has given me a sense of caution, which I guess some people might take as standoffishness. But the converse of that is I have to live inside my own mind and heart, and I will not do so without some sense of protection. And that whole idea too, I wonder if it is a contribution to loneliness...basically, even if you are holding someone in your arms, in your head, it is just you... Oy!
 
I am thinking about something I often think about, though it does tend to result in circular thinking. Is part of being lonely a result of mixed messages or does it stem from our duality? From what I understand, man is a social creature, and that is part of our DNA. But also, since there is so much hostility afloat these days in various situations, can one blame anyone who withdraws? I guess it might be a question of balance (not to appropriate an album title from the Moody Blues), but finding that balance has been a lifelong struggle for me. I was a total outcast in school and though I am close to 60, that also still factors in. It has given me a sense of caution, which I guess some people might take as standoffishness. But the converse of that is I have to live inside my own mind and heart, and I will not do so without some sense of protection. And that whole idea too, I wonder if it is a contribution to loneliness...basically, even if you are holding someone in your arms, in your head, it is just you... Oy!
You know I was a total outcast in school days too and I think that has a lot to do with my personality till this day... I laugh at myself a lot as it was bully myself or be bullied by everyone else, like I always did my best to pretend I was laughing with them and they weren't laughing at me but we all knew the truth. I even do it on here sometimes... I catch myself back as the girl in school sad that others just don't wanna play with me, poor CenotaphGirl! So anyway... Yes I think that can deffo develop a sense of standoffishness and also with me, a point to prove, an "I don't need anyone because I never had anyone" point... not sure if you've ever felt that way?
 
I’m thinking I’m 43 and I was under the impression that I could become something I’m not and I don’t see the point in trying anymore. It’s so stupid because I’ve never had a problem with forming relationships. Yeah, I’ve been single for 10 years but that was mostly because I didnt want another disappointing man in my sons life. I guess that’s it.
 
I’m thinking I’m 43 and I was under the impression that I could become something I’m not and I don’t see the point in trying anymore. It’s so stupid because I’ve never had a problem with forming relationships. Yeah, I’ve been single for 10 years but that was mostly because I didnt want another disappointing man in my sons life. I guess that’s it.
That’s not sad. Not for me at least. It’s just a fact. I actually love the way I’ve always been. It was everyone else picking out parts of my personality they don’t like. I never cared before and since I’ve been trying to care I end up doubting everything. Not cool. I have always been a pretty confident person but lately I question myself and doubt myself. I prefer the natural me
 
You know I was a total outcast in school days too and I think that has a lot to do with my personality till this day... I laugh at myself a lot as it was bully myself or be bullied by everyone else, like I always did my best to pretend I was laughing with them and they weren't laughing at me but we all knew the truth. I even do it on here sometimes... I catch myself back as the girl in school sad that others just don't wanna play with me, poor CenotaphGirl! So anyway... Yes I think that can deffo develop a sense of standoffishness and also with me, a point to prove, an "I don't need anyone because I never had anyone" point... not sure if you've ever felt that way?
I have absolutely felt that way and I thank you very much for posting! The problem with trying to retreat from the world is I can only make it last so long. And forgive me because I do quote a lot, but I am reminded of an expression that more or less says that when you cut yourself off from other people to avoid pain, you also wind up avoiding happiness. So much fun being human, isn't it? 🙄
 

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