Are shy guys really appreciated by women?

[SeiToSai]

Shy would be considered "cute" by girls, but not "cute" as in "I'll have sex with you" type of cute.

Not true. I recently met a very shy and incredibly inexperienced guy with asperger's I thought he was adorable and I wanted to be his girlfriend. But he only wanted sex.

No offense, but there is something incredibly soul crushing about that. No?

I love cuteness. I love hotness too, but a cute guy can be hot to me if I care about him.

 

[Astral_Punisher]

@OP - LeanIntoTheMuse

I know a few girls that are really, really into 'shy' guys, and they are quite attractive, and would love to make these shy men very, very happy (yes, in that, and other, ways).
In this way shy people are a desired demographic. They are appreciated - in one of the girl's cases, actively lusted after!

(Personal problem is, they are good 'non-sexual' friends of mine - and not ones *I* want to endanger friend-wise through trying to dating. )

...
This is unhelpful, Vanilla.

I would be thankful for any assistance, LeaningIntoTheMuse; Vanilla is honestly trying to help you, as we all are.

Shy people are quite simply BAD people...

Wow, that seems like a very up-front and serious declaration of the unsuitability of shy people in the modern social world.
Also, you paint an interesting, 'Darwinian' picture for shy people to be discarded from the dating minds of people everywhere.

"Brutal, but very true to life."
(1000 Points if you get the quote!)

Seriously though, shyness is developed, as you say, and in the same way, outgoing strength can also be 'developed'.
You may feel that you have a 'disease' that will crush you for the rest of your life, but that is not true; not if you have the balls to work towards something better.
Just look at cancer and other fatal illness patients.
They fight their life threatening illnesses for years, sometimes decades, carving out a better life for themselves through shear effort and force of will.
You can, and will do the same.

... Keep in mind, however, that being shy is a disadvantage equivalent to having a missing limb or being a registered sex offender in today's world...

I wouldn't put being shy on the same level as a missing limb, but I would agree that it can be very debilitating to the inflicted.
And as far as I know, liquor is one of the only treatments(half-kidding).

The only way that you could ever be swimming in pussy is if you visited a cat sanctuary after a Tsunami...

*shock*

Shy would be considered "cute" by girls, but not "cute" as in "I'll have sex with you" type of cute.

Not true. I recently met a very shy and incredibly inexperienced guy with asperger's I thought he was adorable and I wanted to be his girlfriend. But he only wanted sex...

I'm sorry that the gentleman in question was only interested in sex.
At least you can be assured that you are lusted after .
Also, you have proved that women do appreciate and want to be girlfriends to shy guys!
Thank you, and OP, please take note!

PUNCH SHYNESS IN THE FACE
You don't have to public speak in-front of the whole world, just one, single, little, tiny person.
That's it.

A) Approach that guy and comment on his cool shirt.
B) Walk up to that girl, and tell her how nice her hair looks.

Strike out?
Don't strike out?
Do it again, with someone else, sometime else.

After a few times, it'll get old-hat.
Congrats!
You have beaten back the shyness 'disease' a bit!
You have talked to cute people!
YOU ARE THE 1%!!!!!

 

[MadMonkè]

girls after shy guys seem kinky.

bonus!

 

[Astral_Punisher]

girls after shy guys seem kinky.

bonus!

MMM-HMMMM!

 

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

That's it. I need a kinky girl!

 

[1oftheid]

Personally I really like shy guys because I find them really cute, but it doesn't really matter what I think.. they probably wouldn't give me the time of day.

 

[Tealeaf]

Shy would be considered "cute" by girls, but not "cute" as in "I'll have sex with you" type of cute.

Not true. I recently met a very shy and incredibly inexperienced guy with asperger's I thought he was adorable and I wanted to be his girlfriend. But he only wanted sex.

No offense, but there is something incredibly soul crushing about that. No?

I love cuteness. I love hotness too, but a cute guy can be hot to me if I care about him.

I had the same experience...

I think shy is endearing, but sometimes it makes me nervous, too, especially if they've had few friends and girlfriends on top of that. I can't tell at first if it's because they're nervous about getting close to people or because nobody wants to put up with their crap and I'll get burned if I let my guard down. I've met some really nasty, inconsiderate, and drama-loving people who were quiet, shy, and/or inexperienced.

 

[IgnoredOne]

I think that shyness is more of a mark against men than it is against women, but that's about the only generalization that can be made about it.

 

[WallflowerGirl83]

To be honest I love shy guys. Shy guys are the best in my opinion. The type of guys I stay away from are guys that are way to forward. It creeps me out and makes me uncomfortable. Last guy I dated always talked about sex and looked at every woman in sight. And when guys stare at me it's like yeah... okay... please move along. But every woman is different. The min a guy talks dirty to me all the time I run for the hills and never look back, lol.

 

[ShybutHi]

Hehe I know a woman who tried to befriend me a few times... She was a bit shy herself but not as shy as me. She is definatly the type who prefer's the shy type of person in general whether for a partner or friends as she said so. I could not meet up with her even though she asked me a few times and to visit her whenever I was in town and she was working...
She was and is going out with an old friend of mine who I see every now and then but she was just too attractive to me (lol I am such an idiot) I just could not put myself in the situation of being friends with someone who was so nice that I would just be there wishing she was mine... She made me so nervous.

lol :club:

 

[perfanoff]

Both introvert and extrovert are necessary in this world.

We wouldn't even be typing in this computer if it wasn't for introverts

Why would computers even exist if it wasn't for the introverts ?!

 

[AFrozenSoul]

Why would computers even exist if it wasn't for the introverts ?!

Computers existed as tools long before the internet friend. Tools that were used to do things much faster than humans could. It is the same reason why humans still build/use super computers.

 

[Thomas]]

The most annoying thing that I find is that (as far as I can tell anyway...) is that almost every girl considers other guys guilty until proven innocent.

It's understandable I guess, but I really dislike others having this assumption that I must be this "typical guy".

To be honest I love shy guys. Shy guys are the best in my opinion. The type of guys I stay away from are guys that are way to forward.

I pretty much know of no girls who share this opinion! :<

 

[WallflowerGirl83]

Hehe I know a woman who tried to befriend me a few times... She was a bit shy herself but not as shy as me. She is definatly the type who prefer's the shy type of person in general whether for a partner or friends as she said so. I could not meet up with her even though she asked me a few times and to visit her whenever I was in town and she was working...
She was and is going out with an old friend of mine who I see every now and then but she was just too attractive to me (lol I am such an idiot) I just could not put myself in the situation of being friends with someone who was so nice that I would just be there wishing she was mine... She made me so nervous.

lol :club:

Aww it's okay. I think I make shy guys nervous as well cause I'm very sweet and caring. But I'm laid back and understanding, especially when guys are shy. I just tell them to be themselves. And I do things to get them to laugh by talking like Cartman or Stewie. That usuallly makes them crack up.

 

[Trent]

cure for shyness:

get outside of your own head and get into the world around you

become disconnected from the "outcome" of your interactions with other people. don't focus on that. you can't control that. you can not make a girl like you. she either will or she won't. but she will never have a chance to if you can't be yourself.

become more focused on being yourself. your best self.

this is a mental shift:

from - wanting people to think that you are awesome

to - being awesome

 

[Stars]

Copy and paste my another post I did...applies to shyness...

Of course...just don't be so non-alpha that you run away from a girl if she looks at your direction or not flirt with her or not show you're interested. I went on a date with this guy one time...I felt he didn't like me cause he kept ignoring me the whole time...turns out I found out that he did actually like me (he texted me later that night after the date) but was too shy (kept ignoring me throughout the whole date and looking at his phone and everywhere else but me...did not talk at all)...either way, it made me feel bad about myself but he's in another city anyhow...

SO IN A NUTSHELL...it's ok to be shy but if you are sooooo shy to the point that you totally ignore a girl's presence...then obviously, the girls aren't likely going to appreciate it or be interested back. Why should a girl be interested in a guy that never looks into her eyes, ignores her and refuses to talk and runs away?? I mean, everyone is patient to some extent...but it's very easy to misinterpret it as the other person not liking you and uncomfortable for everyone involved...

 

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

I hate to bump this, but I hadn't read these last two responses, and they are very helpful. Thanks.

Shame these two users deactivated their accounts.

I definitely feel that shy guys can be appreciated by women. It takes a certain type, though. Some women find shyness cute. But the issue is that you have to work towards being social, despite the shyness, and that is where I have failed. I need to work harder at coming out of my shell.

I have made strides towards that lately, though, and I definitely feel that I am becoming more social.