IgnoredOne said:
That /is/ the golden rule for me. I don't expect anyone else to 'respect my right' so neither do I respect anyone else's. As will be done to me, I do unto others. And I consider it perfectly natural.
hmm, to assume that everyone will not respect you, therefore you will not respect everyone is a bit of an arrogant statement. Are you that confident in your own perception to take it as something on the level of fact? Basically, you are inverting the concept of the golden rule starting from YOUR OWN way of grasping. But did it ever occur to you that it's because of you not respecting everyone that everyone does not respect you? Assuming is such a risky thing to do. Your post sounds logical, but if someone will take a little time to think of it then they would find out the loop holes and how it twists ideas to your own liking and comfort.
As far as I know, logic is never synthesized in that way.
But I do respect your opinion and I do admire that you have your own and stick to it. The only thing that keeps me replying to your posts is that I find that they can easily mislead others. Controversial ideas appeal to people. But someone should at least remind us of the fundamental ideas that are universally considered as just. That includes - stealing, in any form is wrong.
I hate to be the uptight, self-righteous, judging side here, but right now I care less for that as I have also swayed before that lead me to rethink of the real principles everyone tries to adhere.
What keeps us from other animals, aside from having large brains, is that we humans are able to feel or even understand the word ''guilt'' It's the feeling we feel when we hurt someone we love/loved, someone we had history and memories with. Although to the third party, that's a feeling he/she can't relate that much, but to the person cheating with his/her partner, it will pierce like sword. The only sad thing the third person can cause the cheater (his/her supposedly love interest) is that he/she subjected him/her to that feeling of self-loath and guilt in exchange for ''happiness'' when he/she could have just let him/her contemplate and figure out what he/she truly feels before persuading. But then you wouldn't be a good competitor, would you?
You mentioned being the third party, but have you ever cheated with your partner?
IgnoredOne said:
As far as having a committed relationship, it is not /contractual/; it is committed as long as strong feelings were involved. The fact that it fell apart is in itself evidence that those had perhaps dissipated. Once formal vows or innocent victims are involved, then that is a different case.
Feelings and commitment are entirely two very different things, though commitment is brought by feelings. But to rely a relationship on feelings alone is also risky and to a point, silly. There will be times when you feel you don't love your partner anymore and then it would come back the next week. In a long term relationship, it's a process of falling in and out of love over and over with the same person through the years. Imagine if couples would sleep around during their every rough phase.
IgnoredOne said:
As for friends, I've had similar situations where they had women leave them. I've never had one of them feel like it was not his responsibility, regardless of situation; its almost a young male perogative to believe he controls the world anyways(and is invincible), I'm pretty sure, and as such, such a local thing must wholly be his fault.
I don't think all men thinks that. Anyway, to a girl, it would matter more if a guy cares for her more than being the king of the world.
