First time out to a club soon

Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum

Help Support Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum:

This site may earn a commission from merchant affiliate links, including eBay, Amazon, and others.
You know what the best part about those kind of clubs are? It is the fact that you can just drown yourself in video games. I go to a similar bar, with more games :p, where I live. All I do is sit there and play video games. No socializing, no talking (unless I want a drink), nothing. Just games, go outside to cool off a bit, more games, go home. It is great, :p I learned that $20 goes a long way at places like those.
 
Tealeaf said:
If it is, I'll just play games and chat with my friend and anyone else she brings with all night. I plan to primarily do that, anyway. After reading such bile online every day I'm not really interested in taking any numbers away from the club (or letting them take mine). The engine's just not going to start at this point.

Why don't you just go with an open mind, don't judge people just because they're in the club, I mean you're there right? Be a shame if you met someone nice and dismissed them just because of some of the nonsense you read on here, take the number, then meet them somewhere a bit quieter, get to know them properly. No harm in that! :)
 
The Good Citizen said:
Tealeaf said:
If it is, I'll just play games and chat with my friend and anyone else she brings with all night. I plan to primarily do that, anyway. After reading such bile online every day I'm not really interested in taking any numbers away from the club (or letting them take mine). The engine's just not going to start at this point.

Why don't you just go with an open mind, don't judge people just because they're in the club, I mean you're there right? Be a shame if you met someone nice and dismissed them just because of some of the nonsense you read on here, take the number, then meet them somewhere a bit quieter, get to know them properly. No harm in that! :)

I'm not judging them because they're in the club. I'm automatically keeping everything at a platonic arm's length.

Is it fair? Not really.

Is the fact that online, which should be a sanctuary, I take slander about my reproductive choices and value fair? Is it fair that I have to wonder where such people are in the offline world? Is the fact that my last few attempts to date were with very shy, introverted men that I hoped would be more sensitive but who still saw fit to wrong me fair?

It's fair to look out for my own well-being. Everyone is a gamble, and I'm only willing to bet what's required to make new friends. I'm absolutely okay with dismissing a nice man if it saves me from the wannabe PUAs, the ones who've been arguing about how women only like bad boys and deserve to be used, the ones who have a million justifications for cheating or emotional abuse, etc. They don't wear neon t-shirts declaring that to the world and I'm not willing to make the kind of investment necessary to weed them out.
 
Tealeaf said:
The Good Citizen said:
Tealeaf said:
If it is, I'll just play games and chat with my friend and anyone else she brings with all night. I plan to primarily do that, anyway. After reading such bile online every day I'm not really interested in taking any numbers away from the club (or letting them take mine). The engine's just not going to start at this point.

Why don't you just go with an open mind, don't judge people just because they're in the club, I mean you're there right? Be a shame if you met someone nice and dismissed them just because of some of the nonsense you read on here, take the number, then meet them somewhere a bit quieter, get to know them properly. No harm in that! :)

I'm not judging them because they're in the club. I'm automatically keeping everything at a platonic arm's length.

Is it fair? Not really.

Is the fact that even online, which should be a sanctuary, I take slander about my reproductive choices and value fair? Is the fact that my last few attempts to date were with very shy, introverted men who still saw fit to wrong me fair?

It's fair to look out for my own well-being. Everyone is a gamble, and I'm only willing to bet what's required to make new friends. I'm absolutely okay with dismissing a nice man if it saves me from the wannabe PUAs, the ones who've been arguing about how women only like bad boys and deserve to be used, the ones who have a million justifications for cheating or emotional abuse, etc. They don't wear neon t-shirts declaring that to the world and I'm not willing to make the kind of investment necessary to weed them out.

Ok your choice. I just think an open mind is best, if you want to meet someone somewhere it might as well be a club as anywhere else. We can't all fall in love through chance encounters on park benches. As much as we might want to. :)
 
The Good Citizen said:
Ok your choice. I just think an open mind is best, if you want to meet someone somewhere it might as well be a club as anywhere else. We can't all fall in love through chance encounters on park benches. As much as we might want to. :)

I'm not as concerned about meeting someone as I used to be. I think everyone who fears dying alone just needs a few weeks with one of my dates this year.
 
Tealeaf said:
The Good Citizen said:
Ok your choice. I just think an open mind is best, if you want to meet someone somewhere it might as well be a club as anywhere else. We can't all fall in love through chance encounters on park benches. As much as we might want to. :)

I'm not as concerned about meeting someone as I used to be. I think everyone who fears dying alone just needs a few weeks with one of my dates this year.

You'll meet a good one eventually, don't let those that proved a waste of time let you lose sight of that, or give up hope.x
 
The Good Citizen said:
You'll meet a good one eventually, don't let those that proved a waste of time let you lose sight of that, or give up hope.x

If you say so. I think if I could just have a few more friends like the ones I have I'd be set for life. I'm not into gambling.
 
Tealeaf said:
perfanoff said:
You socialize using the body language. Lol
Talking needs to be done from so close that you can feel each other's breath on your necks. I think the loud music is made exactly so you CAN'T be comfortable just talking to each other and so you can get physical easier with other people.. So you either embrace it or you dance around and kick off people who try to talk to your neck. Your choice.

Getting physical with strangers sounds gross as **** (and has since day one... still waiting to "normalize"). Supposedly there's an area away from the dancing for socializing, though (see: a bunch of old arcade games and stuff).

You could say there is, at some places it's arcades, at others it's a couple of sofas.

Anyway enjoy, I'm sure you will have a nice time :)
 

Latest posts

Back
Top