Please believe my intention in saying this was not to hurt you. My deepest apologizes if I ever have.
If I can just say something that I've observed reading your posts - I'd probably know a bit more about you if we actually talked - but that is: You're so dead-set on perfection and having perfection that I believe it really clouds your reality. Not only trying to attain perfection within yourself - with the weight and the car and the job and everything else that you believe would make you better - but with females in general.
I've read more than one post you've made here, relaying your views about the "perfect" ideal. If she doesn't do this, you can't like her. If she isn't this way, you don't like her. If she isn't this way, you couldn't possibly look her way. Well... Why not?
There's a deeper reason why you just can't accept someone as they are. Get to know them on a more personal level. Even if you never see yourself being with them, there's no harm in getting to know someone. Honestly, you never know what could happen. When you limit yourself because someone's not the ideal to you, you're just cutting yourself short on what you could have with someone, be it a romantic relationship, or just the close friendship that you never thought you needed.
You are in many ways, way too harsh on yourself. You don't need to change yourself for anyone to like you. If you want to better yourself by losing weight, or improving your education, or getting a job, that's perfectly fine. I think it's great when people improve themselves.
But the thing is... you have to do it for you. Don't do things because you think it will make someone like you, or because you believe that's what people like more than what or who you are now. You need to do you for you.
