Questions for both Men and Women.

[user 135671]

Do you agree that deep down, men really do prefer nice women?

My take: Yes, but I would also argue that men strongly associate nice women as women who are not nearly as fun, exciting and open as bad girls. This is a blanket statement and generalization that is often not true, but perception is everything.

Men are hunters by nature and love the thrill of the chase. Men like bad girls because they represent the ultimate chase. It's most guy's dream to ride in on the white horse to tame or "save" a "bad" girl. But this is a fool's errand.

A bad girl is elusive and can never truly be tamed. That won't stop a man from trying over and over again. He may get burned every time, but the excitement of the journey is just too much of an adrenaline rush.

 

[insecure]

Men are hunters by nature and love the thrill of the chase. Men like bad girls because they represent the ultimate chase. It's most guy's dream to ride in on the white horse to tame or "save" a "bad" girl. But this is a fool's errand.

Shouldn't we make a distinction between *** and the rest of a relationship?
It is not because you want a bad girl between the sheets, who will dominate you, that you want her to be bossy the whole day through.

 

[Claudia1794]

Do you agree that deep down, men really do prefer nice women?

My take: Yes, but I would also argue that men strongly associate nice women as women who are not nearly as fun, exciting and open as bad girls. This is a blanket statement and generalization that is often not true, but perception is everything.

Men are hunters by nature and love the thrill of the chase. Men like bad girls because they represent the ultimate chase. It's most guy's dream to ride in on the white horse to tame or "save" a "bad" girl. But this is a fool's errand.

A bad girl is elusive and can never truly be tamed. That won't stop a man from trying over and over again. He may get burned every time, but the excitement of the journey is just too much of an adrenaline rush.

I think this applies to some women as well.

 

[Claudia1794]

Shouldn't we make a distinction between *** and the rest of a relationship?
It is not because you want a bad girl between the sheets, who will dominate you, that you want her to be bossy the whole day through.

Either way, there needs to be a balance. I like being in control but I prefer someone who can be assertive and take the reigns sometimes. Probably why I've only had failed relationships, balance is hard to maintain.

 

[insecure]

Either way, there needs to be a balance. I like being in control but I prefer someone who can be assertive and take the reigns sometimes. Probably why I've only had failed relationships, balance is hard to maintain.

Yes, it can't be easy to always know when you want him to take the reigns.

 

[Claudia1794]

Yes, it can't be easy to always know when you want him to take the reigns.

Exactly because if I have to tell him it defeats the purpose. If he does so when I didn't want him to then I'm just mad. I recognized all these things many many years ago which is why I have been single for over 10 years. Im a difficult person to deal with and I know this. Im trying a new approach and that's being up front and honest about but all so there are no surprises, he claims he can handle my ways. We shall see.

 

[user 188717]

~ Scroll to bottom for straight to the point advice. ~

Of course things such as being strongly celibate, having your tubes tied, reproductive organs not working are indeed suffice enough, etc. as a valid stance of the OP's question; however a passionate and strong "real" relationship with another human being (despite how headstrong anyone is), it's nigh impossible to 'not' have physical intimacy.

Many things are easier said than done, two human beings in love not being physical..... eh.... Sorry, but being neutral is not being in love. It's no different than you feeling fulfilled for having a career and set for life. Love doesn't do that, co-dependency, un-addressed ex/family wounds or still needing a Mother or Father in adulthood, does 'that'. Having physical insecurities, does 'that'.

Excuse my bluntness. Just being honest and truthful. To much social red tape and brainwashing these days that having any sexual urges should be immediately buried by your mind because you may or may not be deemed something you actually aren't. Men hating they have **** thoughts, women hating getting wet despite how much they try burying lust. Dun dunnn dunnnnnnn~!!

One does not simply have a relationship with one foot in the door and think it's chivalrous to not please the one they love with the other. That's a red flag in itself. Focused love called loyal sure, but not partaking does not equate to you being more 'loving' than the next human being. Ever.

Life requires Moderation. Be it. Don't Mr. and Mrs. Potatohead yourselves.

Hitting on a fellow broken man or woman, distilling hope that you fix each other is not healthy dating. Being what you want back, truly, is! You get what you are in life folks. Two overly celibate people in a relationship is also relationship dry humping. Doomed for failure as God intended between your legs. To love each other with your junk too!

-------------------- STRAIGHT TO DA POINTZ ------------------
Unless the person you have a relationship with is visually not into sexual activities, you're being used as they have a real relationship with someone amazing in bed that wants no strings attached and they are using you for the missing parts. Most likely for stability, not love. Don't lie to yourself that you're in a real relationship. Sorry....

 

[user 135671]

Exactly because if I have to tell him it defeats the purpose. If he does so when I didn't want him to then I'm just mad. I recognized all these things many many years ago which is why I have been single for over 10 years. Im a difficult person to deal with and I know this. Im trying a new approach and that's being up front and honest about but all so there are no surprises, he claims he can handle my ways. We shall see.

It's all about priorities and deciding what one truly wants in life. I'm a creature of habit and have a hard time breaking cycles of poor choices that have been plaguing my life for years, some even decades. I need to come to terms with why I'm making poor choices with women and what I truly want in a women instead, then I can take active steps toward making the right decisions for myself.

 

[CenotaphGirl]

Do you agree that deep down, men really do prefer nice women?

My take: Yes, but I would also argue that men strongly associate nice women as women who are not nearly as fun, exciting and open as bad girls. This is a blanket statement and generalization that is often not true, but perception is everything.

Men are hunters by nature and love the thrill of the chase. Men like bad girls because they represent the ultimate chase. It's most guy's dream to ride in on the white horse to tame or "save" a "bad" girl. But this is a fool's errand.

A bad girl is elusive and can never truly be tamed. That won't stop a man from trying over and over again. He may get burned every time, but the excitement of the journey is just too much of an adrenaline rush.

Nice girls are nice to cheat on… sad but true, a man would leave his nice girl for little miss hot and dangerous in 3 seconds… flat. Treat em mean keep em keen is true for men and women however, people highlight it for women as they cry about it whereas most men take it in stride…

Don't believe me? Lets conduct a social experiment.

 

[Claudia1794]

It's all about priorities and deciding what one truly wants in life. I'm a creature of habit and have a hard time breaking cycles of poor choices that have been plaguing my life for years, some even decades. I need to come to terms with why I'm making poor choices with women and what I truly want in a women instead, then I can take active steps toward making the right decisions for myself.

So that was my ultimate goal to figure out what was right for me. Sadly, I honestly believe that I prefer to be single. It could be because I've gotten so accustomed to being without a companion (which not to sound crass but is not good if you enjoy the physical aspects) or if I know that all the things I enjoyed in a partner are long behind me.

 

[insecure]

So that was my ultimate goal to figure out what was right for me. Sadly, I honestly believe that I prefer to be single. It could be because I've gotten so accustomed to being without a companion (which not to sound crass but is not good if you enjoy the physical aspects) or if I know that all the things I enjoyed in a partner are long behind me.

Some people are like that, and are perfectly happy without a partner, at least that is what I hear from them.
Anyway, it also depends on what you mean by 'without a partner'.
For some that means abstinence from sexual relations with a different person as well as relationships as a whole, so just being with friends.
For others, it means having lots of one night stands or 'friends with benefits' and simply not attaching themselves in a serious way.

 

[user 135671]

Nice girls are nice to cheat on… sad but true, a man would leave his nice girl for little miss hot and dangerous in 3 seconds… flat. Treat em mean keep em keen is true for men and women however, people highlight it for women as they cry about it whereas most men take it in stride…

Don't believe me? Lets conduct a social experiment.

Princess, you're an absolute wonder!

Sadly, I honestly believe that I prefer to be single.

I'm starting to feel this way too. My daughter cracked me up with " Dad, why are you even thinking about women at your age? get another cat."

 

[Claudia1794]

Some people are like that, and are perfectly happy without a partner, at least that is what I hear from them.
Anyway, it also depends on what you mean by 'without a partner'.
For some that means abstinence from sexual relations with a different person as well as relationships as a whole, so just being with friends.
For others, it means having lots of one night stands or 'friends with benefits' and simply not attaching themselves in a serious way.

I tried friends with benefits, it ended badly. I tried a one night stand once and we ended up together for 7 years and a baby. So, for me no relationship means no ***.

 

[MrLonely86]

Do you agree that deep down, men really do prefer nice women?

Judging by my friends dating patterns , they like toxic bit**es.

 

[NoxApex(N/A)]

Not really a question but this happened to me today:

This guy I work with who often complains to the otherwise-mostly-female staff that he hates being a single guy made the statement that women collectively simply have more attractive bodies on average than men do.



Him and the lady he was talking to disagreed so he then began to ask the entire on-site staff since about half of us were in the same room at the time.

I think it's dumb, but since he put me on the spot about it, I took the opportunity to remind him that both the most attractive men and the most attractive women will still equally **** themselves shortly after they die.

Apparently that was today's dark comedy because everyone laughed.

 

[Claudia1794]

What is something you've always thought or done and just figured that everyone else did it as well?
Me, Ive always looked at men's crotches. Over the years I've been surprised at how many women "claim" they don't look. I check women out too but I've yet to meet a man that would deny he was checking someone out.

 

[user 135067]

What is something you've always thought or done and just figured that everyone else did it as well?
Me, Ive always looked at men's crotches. Over the years I've been surprised at how many women "claim" they don't look. I check women out too but I've yet to meet a man that would deny he was checking someone out.

I think something of an opposite. I think there is a lot of assuming that everyone does the same thing and for that everyone assumes how we should act. Not that you are wrong. I watch people. I size them up. Women as potential partners. Men as potential competition. Isn't that natural? Heh... I should look at myself first and see if I measure up.

Crotch watch habits I'll assume has some baring on ***. *** is our second most innate characteristic. Survival is first. Then, you didn't mention if you look upon them with desire, with curiosity, or with repulsion. Probably some of each.

Myself I find breasts interesting. Cleavage. I don't know why. I prefer a partner with small breasts. It has more to do with feel than appearance. But ample cleavage is more fascinating to see. The nearly revealed is more satisfying than the fully revealed. Explain that.

Is a crotch in jeans more interesting than a crotch in a tight swimming suit? Is a business suit crotch as alluring as the shimmering costume of a performer? Was Elvis's popularity due to his crotchiness?

It's odd how shapes appeal to us. Some faces are to die for, and some are eh. Why? They all have eyes nose and mouth. How is it that the same few elements can be so different?

I have a bit of face blindness. That I can recognize some faces and not others has been a self-study for some time. I'll know you when I see you in the bar where I always see you, but to run into you at the grocery store, you are a stranger.

I had a friend that had a 1940 Ford with that sweeping roof line. He had to put a sign on it "please do not touch" because guys would swish their hand down it. He eventually concluded it was sexual. That sweeping shape is the same as a woman lying on her side.

Who and what appeals to us has to do with how we process the shapes. It's weird how we can be triggered by shapes.

I drew a picture of a character for one of my projects. A friend saw it, it being a half page line drawing, and he went nuts over it expressing out loud that he could love her. Why? It was just ink. It didn't have a gender other than the shapes of the lines that spoke to him as female. How do pencil lines inspire love?

Anyway... our attraction to shapes is a weird puzzle. Face shapes. **** shapes. Crotch shapes. Is it always about sexual attraction? I like a Victorian house. It's not sexual. It doesn't have the same appeal as even a tomato that resembles a pair of breasts.

Shapes. What are your favorite shapes? Ever wonder why?

 

[Finished]

I think something of an opposite. I think there is a lot of assuming that everyone does the same thing and for that everyone assumes how we should act. Not that you are wrong. I watch people. I size them up. Women as potential partners. Men as potential competition. Isn't that natural? Heh... I should look at myself first and see if I measure up.

Crotch watch habits I'll assume has some baring on ***. *** is our second most innate characteristic. Survival is first. Then, you didn't mention if you look upon them with desire, with curiosity, or with repulsion. Probably some of each.

Myself I find breasts interesting. Cleavage. I don't know why. I prefer a partner with small breasts. It has more to do with feel than appearance. But ample cleavage is more fascinating to see. The nearly revealed is more satisfying than the fully revealed. Explain that.

Is a crotch in jeans more interesting than a crotch in a tight swimming suit? Is a business suit crotch as alluring as the shimmering costume of a performer? Was Elvis's popularity due to his crotchiness?

It's odd how shapes appeal to us. Some faces are to die for, and some are eh. Why? They all have eyes nose and mouth. How is it that the same few elements can be so different?

I have a bit of face blindness. That I can recognize some faces and not others has been a self-study for some time. I'll know you when I see you in the bar where I always see you, but to run into you at the grocery store, you are a stranger.

I had a friend that had a 1940 Ford with that sweeping roof line. He had to put a sign on it "please do not touch" because guys would swish their hand down it. He eventually concluded it was sexual. That sweeping shape is the same as a woman lying on her side.

Who and what appeals to us has to do with how we process the shapes. It's weird how we can be triggered by shapes.

I drew a picture of a character for one of my projects. A friend saw it, it being a half page line drawing, and he went nuts over it expressing out loud that he could love her. Why? It was just ink. It didn't have a gender other than the shapes of the lines that spoke to him as female. How do pencil lines inspire love?

Anyway... our attraction to shapes is a weird puzzle. Face shapes. **** shapes. Crotch shapes. Is it always about sexual attraction? I like a Victorian house. It's not sexual. It doesn't have the same appeal as even a tomato that resembles a pair of breasts.

Shapes. What are you favorite shapes? Ever wonder why?

I agree we are all drawn to shapes. I like rectangles and circles (even half circles) I don't know why: Ha! ha!

 

[Claudia1794]

***** shapes are my favorite shapes. Im like a prepubescent boy always saying "hey, that looks like a *****." When I was younger I thought perhaps I was supposed to have been a boy because I always wanted to do what the boys were doing, I acted like the boys, I always preferred to be around the boys. I was a tomboy but I had crushes on the boys so I knew I liked boys. It was just like part of my brain was actually a boy. Its funny because this one boy use to say I was a hermaphrodite. We tried explaining to him that he wasnt using the word the right way. He couldn't be convinced but he was 12.
Was this because of some **** that happened to me and I thought that "hey if I'm a boy that will never happen again"? That was actually a dumbed downed version of the bucket of **** a quack tried to serve me. I don't eat **** though. I got into some trouble before I turned 10 asking the boys to see their penises. It was curiosity. The curiosity has not faded but I don't ask to see anymore. I demand it. Im joking, not really at least not all men.
The curiosity did spill over onto the female private parts the first time I saw one that wasn't mine I was 14 and my friend didn't know how to use a tampon and I had to show her. I was amazed at how different we looked. I mean the internet was not like it is now. Even though I still look at crotches and wonder about lots of people and would probably never turn down the chance at someone just wanting to show me I keep it to myself now. You offend a few people or get some crazy looks when commenting, you learn to keep **** to yourself.
While I know I am obsessed with ***** shapes I agree that sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.

 

[NoxApex(N/A)]

***** shapes are my favorite shapes. Im like a prepubescent boy always saying "hey, that looks like a *****." When I was younger I thought perhaps I was supposed to have been a boy because I always wanted to do what the boys were doing, I acted like the boys, I always preferred to be around the boys. I was a tomboy but I had crushes on the boys so I knew I liked boys. It was just like part of my brain was actually a boy. Its funny because this one boy use to say I was a hermaphrodite. We tried explaining to him that he wasnt using the word the right way. He couldn't be convinced but he was 12.
Was this because of some **** that happened to me and I thought that "hey if I'm a boy that will never happen again"? That was actually a dumbed downed version of the bucket of **** a quack tried to serve me. I don't eat **** though. I got into some trouble before I turned 10 asking the boys to see their penises. It was curiosity. The curiosity has not faded but I don't ask to see anymore. I demand it. Im joking, not really at least not all men.
The curiosity did spill over onto the female private parts the first time I saw one that wasn't mine I was 14 and my friend didn't know how to use a tampon and I had to show her. I was amazed at how different we looked. I mean the internet was not like it is now. Even though I still look at crotches and wonder about lots of people and would probably never turn down the chance at someone just wanting to show me I keep it to myself now. You offend a few people or get some crazy looks when commenting, you learn to keep **** to yourself.
While I know I am obsessed with ***** shapes I agree that sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.

Yes, he was using the term wrong. Likely due to the fact that he was a kid.
And in short: Yes, phallic and yonic symbols in things rather intended to or not can be funny.