Questions for the Men

[TheRealCallie]

So, since the men want questions, I have one.

Would you date someone if you knew they had a jealous ex? What if you found out after you started dating her that they have a jealous ex, would you stay in the relationship?

Yes, I would. As long as she's over him. Why should his issues effect our happiness?

Well, the problem lies in that we have kids together, so he is a big part of my life, even if I am over him and there is no chance in hell of us ever getting back together. There most likely would be drama.

 

[TheRealCallie]

Since I mentioned it, how do you guys feel about kids or "ready made families"?

 

[Xpendable]

Because you didn't actually answer the question....

Subtext?

 

[VanillaCreme]

Since I mentioned it, how do you guys feel about kids or "ready made families"?

I was actually curious about this too for some guys.

 

[Zook]

Well, the problem lies in that we have kids together, so he is a big part of my life, even if I am over him and there is no chance in hell of us ever getting back together. There most likely would be drama.

Hmm, that's a tricky one, but you can't let him destroy any future happiness you might have. That would be unfair to you.

Since I mentioned it, how do you guys feel about kids or "ready made families"?

I can't say personally because I've never been in that situation. If I really liked the girl I don't see it being a problem.

Someone I used to know didn't have a problem with it and used to jump into relationships with women who had kids a lot.

It really does depend on how much you click.

 

[Triple Bogey]

Since I mentioned it, how do you guys feel about kids or "ready made families"?

It wouldn't be a problem if I really liked the lady.

 

[Triple Bogey]

So, since the men want questions, I have one.

Would you date someone if you knew they had a jealous ex? What if you found out after you started dating her that they have a jealous ex, would you stay in the relationship?

All depends if the jealous ex caused problems for me (or the lady).
Any kind of physical confrontation, I would probably call it a day !

 

[kamya]

Since I mentioned it, how do you guys feel about kids or "ready made families"?

I was actually curious about this too for some guys.

It really depends on the guy and where he is at and what he is looking for. I'm going to admit that it does take a special kind of guy to make that work out well.

For me I know I would have to think long and hard before going into something like that. It for sure complicated everything. The most scary part would be potentially getting attached to kids that aren't really yours. And then if things go wrong, you never get to see them again.

As for the jealous ex. Again it would really have to depend on the situation and different guys are going to deal with it differently. Personally, I don't really know what I would do. Probably see if its possible to get to know him and become friends somehow. Show him I'm not his enemy. Then when the breakup happens we can go out and be hole brothers and get drunk and talk honeysuckle.

 

[Paraiyar]

Since I mentioned it, how do you guys feel about kids or "ready made families"?

I don't want the responsibility of raising children I didn't bring into the world.

 

[TheRealCallie]

Since I mentioned it, how do you guys feel about kids or "ready made families"?

I don't want the responsibility of raising children I didn't bring into the world.

What if you fell in love with her before you knew she had kids? Would you run even then?

 

[BadGuy]

Since I mentioned it, how do you guys feel about kids or "ready made families"?

I don't want the responsibility of raising children I didn't bring into the world.

What if you fell in love with her before you knew she had kids? Would you run even then?

if you have fallen in love you should probably have spent enough time with her to know she has children...know a lot about her

 

[Paraiyar]

Since I mentioned it, how do you guys feel about kids or "ready made families"?

I don't want the responsibility of raising children I didn't bring into the world.

What if you fell in love with her before you knew she had kids? Would you run even then?

To be honest I think if I didn't know something that crucial about them then what I would be experiencing would be infatuation and not love. But assuming that this does happen then that would be tough for me to decide.

 

[Paraiyar]

Since I mentioned it, how do you guys feel about kids or "ready made families"?

I don't want the responsibility of raising children I didn't bring into the world.

What if you fell in love with her before you knew she had kids? Would you run even then?

if you have fallen in love you should probably have spent enough time with her to know she has children...know a lot about her

Yeah, my thoughts exactly.

 

[TheRealCallie]

Since I mentioned it, how do you guys feel about kids or "ready made families"?

I don't want the responsibility of raising children I didn't bring into the world.

What if you fell in love with her before you knew she had kids? Would you run even then?

if you have fallen in love you should probably have spent enough time with her to know she has children...know a lot about her

Yeah, my thoughts exactly.

Lol, I didn't say it was logical that it would happen, I just wanted to know how you would feel if you fell in love with someone who had kids.

That actually happened to a friend of mine. He was adamant about not dating anyone with kids. He's now engaged to someone with kids.

 

[ladyforsaken]

Not sure if this question has been asked before, but I'll just go ahead and ask:

In the scenario that you have a woman in your life, you start planning for a family and start having kids. Do you guys prefer your woman to continue working after her maternity leave ends or do you prefer for her to stop working and take care of your child(ren)? This is not considering how she would feel about this. What would you prefer for yourself?

 

[user 115627]

Rationally speaking, if the financial situation is stable enough (read: I earn enough) to allow her to stay at home, why not? It depends on what kind of job she worked before. Low-wage wouldn't make that much a difference, but if it's one in good position, maybe they would even pay the day care fees (that's an actual thing in my current company). Maybe there are also options of working part-time or home office. I certainly wouldn't want her to sacrifice her career completely for the kids unless she really wants to raise them herself. Because we would be kinda screwed if I got booted out of my job all of sudden.

...what a completely fictional scenario for me. *cough*

 

[ladyforsaken]

^Fictional but interesting nonetheless!

 

[Paraiyar]

Not sure if this question has been asked before, but I'll just go ahead and ask:

In the scenario that you have a woman in your life, you start planning for a family and start having kids. Do you guys prefer your woman to continue working after her maternity leave ends or do you prefer for her to stop working and take care of your child(ren)? This is not considering how she would feel about this. What would you prefer for yourself?

If the financial situation is stable then I would prefer for her to stop working.

 

[MentatsGhoul]

Not sure if this question has been asked before, but I'll just go ahead and ask:

In the scenario that you have a woman in your life, you start planning for a family and start having kids. Do you guys prefer your woman to continue working after her maternity leave ends or do you prefer for her to stop working and take care of your child(ren)? This is not considering how she would feel about this. What would you prefer for yourself?

If possible, I would think it's ideal for one parent to remain with the child at least for the first 4 or so years. It doesn't necessarily have to be the woman, I think the decision should be based on who has the better paid, more stable and enjoyable career.

 

[ThatZealousOne]

So, since the men want questions, I have one.

Would you date someone if you knew they had a jealous ex? What if you found out after you started dating her that they have a jealous ex, would you stay in the relationship?

I have noted that this thread seems to get less questions than the questions for women thread. Heh.

Still, let's ignore the fact that I probably would anyway because she's probably picking at the bottom of the barrel dating me anyway. However, a more reasoned approach would be to ask if there was still something there. If there wasn't, then sure, whatever. Depends how brave/stupid I was feeling I guess. Some of us guys aren't really good with conflict, and I wouldn't exactly want to put myself on the line for little reason.