Questions for the Women

[TheRealCallie]

I have a question for the ladies.
How important are presents to women?
I am not a present person. Never was, even as a kid. Didn't want them given to me and not a fan of giving them either.
I think being good to someone on a regular basis is the best possible present.
But over the years I get the impression that presents seem very important to women -- more so than men.
Even though I have never had a girlfriend, I have had "sugar babies" and they've on occasion given me presents that I really did not want.
Sweaters, jackets, etc.. I had no interest in wearing.
Faked being happy about these presents. I still have them in my closet. Have to donate them to goodwill or something.
I even once got a LV wallet -- I think it was a fake, but still, it was bulky and I HATE bulky wallets, but I still had to use it to not hurt the girl's feelings. I went back top my nice skinny wallet after I stopped seeing her.
Can any of the ladies shed light on why presents seem so important to females?
Or am I off base and is this just an individual thing?

I personally think it's just an individual thing. I don't care for presents either. Okay, yeah, get me something small on special occasions or whatever, but I'm talking like less than $10. Take me somewhere, hell even a gumball ring or something cheesy like that....Even better, would be something you made. Even if it's just a very poorly drawn handwritten card. lol
Also, I hate flowers. Don't give me flowers. They die, what's that say about the **** relationship? "Oh, gee, thanks for the flowers that will die in a few days.....it really shows me you love me" wtf....lol I'm more of a practical girl. Give me something I can USE, not just something that will sit there collecting dust.

BUT, that's just me.

 

[Claudia1794]

I think it depends on the situation and the individual. There are those people that buy presents because they genuinely care for and thought of the recipient and then there’s people who give gifts with strings attached. I don’t like gifts usually because I always feel as if it’s more of a bribe or a bargaining chip. Why? Oh the reasons are many that I won’t go into. However, if you know someone well enough then you know their likes and dislikes and you avoid things that might cause a ripple. I think some people like receiving gifts because it makes them feel special, thought of, appreciated and even if the gift was given with some other intention those people just ignore it and are happy for the gift. Me, not so much. If someone thinks of me I’d rather them just tell me or show me in a physical way. So yeah, I don’t want flowers, a card, a diamond, a car or anything else I can get for myself because if I wanted it I’d get it.

 

[TheRealCallie]

I don’t like gifts usually because I always feel as if it’s more of a bribe or a bargaining chip

Yes, exactly this for me too.

a card

Last year, my grandma told me she didn't have a card for me for my birthday yet. I told her I don't want a card. But really, this is my grandmother, she has a certain way of doing things and won't ever change. lol Anyway, I told her to draw me a pretty picture with a cat and a girl. She prints one off the internet. That's not what I said....the paper card she gave me went right in the trash. I don't want that honeysuckle, it's just a waste.

a diamond,

I actually dislike flashy and I don't wear jewelry, so don't waste your money, I won't wear it.

a car

Well........I mean......depends on the car lol

 

[Claudia1794]

Yes, exactly this for me too.

Last year, my grandma told me she didn't have a card for me for my birthday yet. I told her I don't want a card. But really, this is my grandmother, she has a certain way of doing things and won't ever change. lol Anyway, I told her to draw me a pretty picture with a cat and a girl. She prints one off the internet. That's not what I said....the paper card she gave me went right in the trash. I don't want that honeysuckle, it's just a waste.

I actually dislike flashy and I don't wear jewelry, so don't waste your money, I won't wear it.

Well........I mean......depends on the car lol

The more they spend the more they want in return, in my experience. No more gift cars for me. I learned that lesson.
Obviously, I know not all men are like this and I am speaking from my experiences only.

 

[TheRealCallie]

The more they spend the more they want in return, in my experience. No more gift cars for me. I learned that lesson.

lol, I've never been given a car. Okay, my ex did buy a truck and it was more or less mine, but we both knew it was actually his. And then when he left, I kept the car, but that was different, he has his truck for work and I had two kids, I needed the car and it was in his name, but I was making the payments, so that was different.

Hell, I won't even buy my KID a car. He needs to earn his own money and get one himself. He won't appreciate it otherwise. No silver platter for him, you want something, you work hard and you earn it.

 

[Claudia1794]

lol, I've never been given a car. Okay, my ex did buy a truck and it was more or less mine, but we both knew it was actually his. And then when he left, I kept the car, but that was different, he has his truck for work and I had two kids, I needed the car and it was in his name, but I was making the payments, so that was different.

Hell, I won't even buy my KID a car. He needs to earn his own money and get one himself. He won't appreciate it otherwise. No silver platter for him, you want something, you work hard and you earn it.

Maybe that’s what I should’ve done with my son. When he turned 16 I bought him a car thinking he would get his license. He has yet to get his DL and I drive the car twice a week so it doesn’t just sit.

 

[Abstamyous]

I have a question for the ladies.
How important are presents to women?

My main love language is quality time. That is a great gift. I know it's historically acceptable to shower the person you are trying to win with materials, but I'm all about the "how does love feel when we sit with each other".

I like to give gifts, but over the last few years the thought process has gone from "things that I think they like" to "what are practical things that they could and will use".

 

[CenotaphGirl]

I have a question for the ladies.
How important are presents to women?
I am not a present person. Never was, even as a kid. Didn't want them given to me and not a fan of giving them either.
I think being good to someone on a regular basis is the best possible present.
But over the years I get the impression that presents seem very important to women -- more so than men.
Even though I have never had a girlfriend, I have had "sugar babies" and they've on occasion given me presents that I really did not want.
Sweaters, jackets, etc.. I had no interest in wearing.
Faked being happy about these presents. I still have them in my closet. Have to donate them to goodwill or something.
I even once got a LV wallet -- I think it was a fake, but still, it was bulky and I HATE bulky wallets, but I still had to use it to not hurt the girl's feelings. I went back top my nice skinny wallet after I stopped seeing her.
Can any of the ladies shed light on why presents seem so important to females?
Or am I off base and is this just an individual thing?

I love presents but I prefer time and talkinggg omg I know men hate women that talk a lot but I genuinely cant shut up I actually used to play a game with my ex buy him random fave candy from the shop and he had to guess what I picked and cute stuff like that… if he guessed right too quickly I’d say nooooooo nahh lol and he’d guess for hours

My ex never gave me gifts as such just money, his gift was always “go shopping” no real thought behind it… but I love shopping so that worked

 

[Unsigned]

I know men hate women that talk a lot

I actually like that.
I'm a good listener.
I don't talk much about myself with girls I see, though.
I'd say it's about 80 to 90% them talking about themselves and what's going on in their lives and me listening.
A lot of that is them complaining about issues, but still, I don't mind it.

 

[user 164061]

Twitter is toxic AF. I was on it for about a week to get something for free, but that was about all I could stand.

It is like a radioactive waste dump. I stopped using it before it got mega toxic, but I probably should delete my account there now because its so bad

 

[TheSkaFish]

Twitter is toxic AF. I was on it for about a week to get something for free, but that was about all I could stand.

I never had one, and I definitely won't now that it's owned by fake futurist, fake scientist, and all around fake smart guy Elon is running it.

The more he opens his mouth, and just the more he does in general, the less intelligent he seems to really be.

He's certainly not some genius playing 10-dimensional chess and 100 moves ahead of us all. And he's not going to take us into the future either. He doesn't really care about that, even if he was capable of it which seems more and more iffy at best. He's just a garden-variety egotist, nothing new to see here.

When is he going to Mars? I'll help him pack.

 

[user 135671]

When is he going to Mars? I'll help him pack.

 

[4No1]

I have a question for the ladies.
How important are presents to women?
I am not a present person. Never was, even as a kid. Didn't want them given to me and not a fan of giving them either.
I think being good to someone on a regular basis is the best possible present.
But over the years I get the impression that presents seem very important to women -- more so than men.
Even though I have never had a girlfriend, I have had "sugar babies" and they've on occasion given me presents that I really did not want.
Sweaters, jackets, etc.. I had no interest in wearing.
Faked being happy about these presents. I still have them in my closet. Have to donate them to goodwill or something.
I even once got a LV wallet -- I think it was a fake, but still, it was bulky and I HATE bulky wallets, but I still had to use it to not hurt the girl's feelings. I went back top my nice skinny wallet after I stopped seeing her.
Can any of the ladies shed light on why presents seem so important to females?
Or am I off base and is this just an individual thing?

I think it's an individual.
I like presents, but something small and nice. A pen, a nice cookie, a pencil(I like this kinf of staff), The best present I've ever had is a happiness: printed 3D-model of C8H11N02 (dopamine).
But if someone doesn't like to get/give them, I accept it, no problem. For me the answer is: nice, but not important.

 

[Claudia1794]

I’m really starting to think I’m a bitter *****
Yep silly me...I already knew that

 

[Unsigned]

I think it's an individual.
I like presents, but something small and nice. A pen, a nice cookie, a pencil(I like this kinf of staff), The best present I've ever had is a happiness: printed 3D-model of C8H11N02 (dopamine).
But if someone doesn't like to get/give them, I accept it, no problem. For me the answer is: nice, but not important.

Yeah small gifts are fine.
I gave my last girl a small carton of Cadbury eggs at Easter. She laughed..but she liked it and ate them all.

I like pies. Or a bottle of wine or booze.

 

[TheRealCallie]

Ladies! Lets get shallow…

What colour lipstick do you wear?

 

[ardour]

How much of a problem is "ulterior motives," say, when a man is "nice" (enquires, offers to help, etc.) but you know he's romantically interested?

 

[Murakami_1]

How much of a problem is "ulterior motives," say, when a man is "nice" (enquires, offers to help, etc.) but you know he's romantically interested?

Well it depends on what the ulterior motives are... If you are nice because you like someone and want to ask them out it isn't that bad in my opinion. I do this too, its natural to be nice to people you like. If you are nice because you only want to have sex with someone it's just douchy. Just dont be mean in general i suposse, it does sound bad if you are only nice because you want something.

My verdict is just dont be an arse

 

[TheSkaFish]

Sure I get angry and annoyed at times but I like to think I'm nice and agreeable because it's just what I default to.

A lot of the time - believe it or not - I'm not opinionated enough about something to have strong enough feelings about it to be disagreeable.

And I'm not interested in social competition and dominance games at all - not just because I think I'm not strong enough to play, but because I think they are unnecessary, unevolved, and just boring. It just creates another problem to worry about in a life where I already have enough on my plate just dealing with what I deal with day to day. I'd rather follow my curiosity and interest about something else.

I feel like for me to be a disagreeable man, I'd have to go out of my way to disagree about things that I really don't.

It's like how I seem shy and reserved. A lot of the time I just don't have any input on the thing at hand. I don't say anything because I don't have anything to say.

 

[Unsigned]

Hypothetical question for the ladies.

If you were relatively happily married and about to have a child, would you be offended if your husband delayed signing the birth certificate until the infant was DNA tested for paternity?

Also, what about a pre-nuptial agreement prior to marriage? Would you be offended if asked to sign one?

From a male POV, this seems prudent to me, given the divorce rates & very pro-female alimony/child support laws in the US (and I assume Western Europe as well). But I can also see where some females might find this offensive. Just curious how offensive. Thanks.