Was just browsing really really old threads here under my older account and then I realised that if I were to count the number of years I've known ALL... it'd be something around 13 years or so. When I first landed here, I had a huge void in my life after losing my father. It was fairly recent and I remember feeling really lonely at night stumbling across this forum and not knowing how much it would have helped me through the years and how many friends I would have made and not to mention how many good people I would've come across in my ALL journey.
It's so.. full of memories when I think back and I sincerely hope that each and every one of you who have crossed paths with me on here and are no longer in touch are doing okay, or at peace. I've changed so much over these 13 years, some areas for the better and some I feel are not too favourable due to the major events that have happened in my life. I'm content though, and I'm grateful.
There was a time when I wasn't sure I would make it back, and I was really sick, but I had good friends who kept the bridge between me and this forum and the amazing people here alive for me and it was a form of motivation, little did I know. I still look back at that particular thread you guys made for me (I feel so embarrassed about it now) but I remember everything from that period of my life so vividly even though it has been over 4 years ago.
I also want to say to some, that my lack of keeping in touch the recent months/years isn't personal and that it doesn't mean I don't care about you. I really just need to deal with my demons a lot more and it sucks up so much energy. It doesn't mean I don't appreciate you or the interaction or the friendship we have. I always will.
Ah, so many people and so many memories running through my mind right now.
Also having you in my thoughts, Deb. <3