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harper said:
I had all kinds of pity observations and advice here, but edited it to this: I wish you luck in changing your fortunes for the better. It can CERTAINLY be done, and you seem intelligent enough to be clear and confident when you do decide to make a move.

edit:  To be clear, this was supposed to read "PITHY" rather than "pity". 
It's an important distinction, and an unfortunate typo!

Haha looks like I learned a new word today. But thanks for the vote of confidence. I always dreamed of a day when I didn't have to resign myself to circumstances like we've almost always done, but I have a hard time trusting myself and what intelligence I have. Growing up I was considered "smart", but the least of the "smart people", so I've kinda been caught in this in-between zone where I feel like I should be able to make it, but don't really feel smart enough to at the same time. I've tried a bunch of fields and definitely ran across a few that went way over my head.

I guess...I really wish I knew what I could be good at, where I can make the most money and get furthest ahead and really get as in control of my life as possible. And I'd also like to know what I actually like, cause the idea of spending most of my life doing something I didnt like, makes me feel like I would still be losing.
All I know for sure is, not being in control is no fun, and doing whatever doesn't work. I have to get specific.

Then I'd have to find out how to be an interesting person....I have a lot of stuff to do.

ladyforsaken said:
Be careful, Ska. Hope the knee heals quickly.

Thanks. It's a little better now, and I hope I can get back into it this weekend.


ahsatan said:
Hope u feel better soon skafish!  Walruses are cute! :p

iu

Aww I loved this, they are so cute.  It made me smile with joy :)
 
i'm remembering my seven friends we are gangs i'm the leader, we were on our middle school, we plays, visit each other, when we sick, when we eats, we gone to our fave book store in town, we talked about our future until my narcs came bring their dark clouds then they're gone.


ahsatan said:

oh i know this all too well, i always have a headache like five times in a week,  :club:
 
Happy to hopefully see my girlfriend tomorrow. The first time in a week. That's if she wants to see me tomorrow. She needed space. I still have the flowers and chocolates.

Hopefully she says yes and I'll be happy :)
 
I’m gonna snooze a little while the washing machine does it’s job. 
Feel like curling up under the cover and staying there today. 
Think I’ll read. 🌸
 
Finally get what i didn't get that time. I was sort of right after all. I took the easy blatant way, but the issue was more refined. 
Now i don't know what it means for me. It's really tempting to take the same way, but nothing suggests that that will be a good idea in any measurable form.
I vaguely feel like i can amass some will to do something though. That's been a while. I don't entirely like that. I still feel like i've had enough. I guess this is in spite of. Just thinking about it obliterates any will to try. Why would i. 
But now it seems like this is why, there's an ever so slight i can get it back, that i can have my cake and eat it too.
And so, maybe.
 
ardour said:
Just an old man. Nothing matters now.

Yeah I feel this way sometimes and i'm 51 :D

But not this morning stuck in a traffic jam into London early.I can't wait to get my electric van and stop polluting with my old diesel , got to help the kids in the future , but it doesn't help when they close a main road into London as well as Hammersmith bridge traffic is gridlocked now :club:
 
Doubt.
I'm doubting my past, future, and present. I'm doubting others but most of all myself. I'm doubting my thoughts. I'm doubting this reply. I doubt.
 
To each their own. :p

Not a fan of hot and humid weather here lol.

Wind, rain, and snow are my preferences. <3
 

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