What are you thinking right now?

[TheSkaFish]

You're so jaded (Urban dictionary definition). And you let society dictate what your life is and isn't, and you continue to let society decide what it should be. You know what you want, but do you know who you are? There are no "rules" to life. Whoever told you that laughed at you for days.

Well, there's the law. There's also decency. They broke both, routinely. Maybe you would have had to have been there to see just what kind of people I'm talking about. I'm telling you, they aren't good guys. They aren't good people, period. But they sure do get, anything they ask for.

What should I have done then? Should I have been a bully myself? What should I do now? Just accept a honeysuckle sandwich from life with a smile on my face? This is what frustrates me about this place. I thought we were all misfits here, I thought we had that in common. Outsiders trying to make it in an insider's world. This guy was an insider. He was one of the bad guys. Yet even here everyone just loves to take their side. I don't believe it.

I know who I am, sure. And I know I'm going to keep going for what I want.

All I'm saying about ALL OF THIS, is that here I am trying to find my way in the world, and I saw that a guy who I'd known to be a scumbag and a bad guy was coasting. Am I really that wrong for being mad about that, even just a little? Is that not even a little frustrating? Has that never happened to any of you before?

 

[TheRealCallie]

You're so jaded (Urban dictionary definition). And you let society dictate what your life is and isn't, and you continue to let society decide what it should be. You know what you want, but do you know who you are? There are no "rules" to life. Whoever told you that laughed at you for days.

Well, there's the law. There's also decency. They broke both, routinely. Maybe you would have had to have been there to see just what kind of people I'm talking about. I'm telling you, they aren't good guys. They aren't good people, period. But they sure do get, anything they ask for.

I know who I am, sure. And I know I'm going to keep going for what I want.

All I'm saying about ALL OF THIS, is that here I am trying to find my way in the world, and I saw that a guy who I'd known to be a scumbag and a bad guy was coasting. Am I really that wrong for being mad about that, even just a little? Has that never happened to any of you before?

PAST TENSE. Just because you KNEW him before doesn't mean you do now. People grow up, people change. People aren't always what you once knew them to be.

 

[VanillaCreme]

I think some ice cream would help this sore throat, yeah? Even if it doesn't... Ice cream!

You're so jaded (Urban dictionary definition). And you let society dictate what your life is and isn't, and you continue to let society decide what it should be. You know what you want, but do you know who you are? There are no "rules" to life. Whoever told you that laughed at you for days.

Well, there's the law. There's also decency. They broke both, routinely. Maybe you would have had to have been there to see just what kind of people I'm talking about. I'm telling you, they aren't good guys. They aren't good people, period. But they sure do get, anything they ask for.

I know who I am, sure. And I know I'm going to keep going for what I want.

All I'm saying about ALL OF THIS, is that here I am trying to find my way in the world, and I saw that a guy who I'd known to be a scumbag and a bad guy was coasting. Am I really that wrong for being mad about that, even just a little? Is that not even a little frustrating? Has that never happened to any of you before?

No. I don't know the people you're talking about, I'll admit that much. And that's exactly why I'd never assume I do know them. And I certainly wouldn't take someone's word without seeing for myself. I don't pass judgment on people, nor do I sit and wish them horrendous lives because goodness forbid they drink liquor or smoke. Robbing and hurting people, okay, sure, they need to be smacked a few times. But just because you don't do the things they do doesn't make you any better than any of them. You just refuse to realize how much you put people down because they do things you don't agree with. They're humans, not copies of you.

Why do you even care if they get what they want anyway? Concentrate on your own situation. Maybe you wouldn't be in it if you did.

 

[TheSkaFish]

No. I don't know the people you're talking about, I'll admit that much. And that's exactly why I'd never assume I do know them. And I certainly wouldn't take someone's word without seeing for myself. I don't pass judgment on people, nor do I sit and wish them horrendous lives because goodness forbid they drink liquor or smoke. Robbing and hurting people, okay, sure, they need to be smacked a few times. But just because you don't do the things they do doesn't make you any better than any of them. You just refuse to realize how much you put people down because they do things you don't agree with. They're humans, not copies of you.

Think frat-boy types. I'm sorry but I've never thought those types were good people. I also don't think people who do coke are good people. And I never thought I'd see people rushing to their defense here, of all places. They wouldn't have too nice of things to say about you, or me, or just about anyone on this site. They're the kind of person who thinks they don't have to respect you because of their social status. This is the real type of person who thinks they are "better" than you.

Why do you even care if they get what they want anyway? Concentrate on your own situation. Maybe you wouldn't be in it if you did.

Yea pretty much. I don't really care. This particular person never did anything to me personally, I just didn't like his character or his type and seeing him coast in the world in spite of the drugs, it was something I saw that gave me a brief moment of frustration. Honestly I got madder at people's responses here than I am at the actual issue. Whatever. Doesn't matter anyway.

 

[Alma lost her spoon]

I'm awake!!

 

[Littlesecret]

Carrying The Green Eyed Monster, envying others their accomplishments, pining for women who've got someone else, and sitting on the sidelines watching life go by sounds like fun....hmmmm, maybe not so much.

Accomplishments my ass....like I said, this guy had an alcohol and drug problem. But I guess he's the smart one. Stupid me, I should have been like him and others of his type, drinking my face off every week and stealing money from my parents to buy drugs. Obviously those are the people who get ahead.

As far as the women, the only women I find desirable are indeed gone for now. Anyone left would only ever be second best to me and I wouldn't be able to date them with any real enthusiasm. What am I supposed to do, just smile and pretend I'm happy with someone who doesn't fulfill me? Just give up and accept second-best as the best I can get? Besides, maybe they'll ditch those scumbags someday. Maybe if I change enough, they'll notice it, ditch the deadbeats, and come around. It could happen and every other time I've given up on something, it was the wrong choice and things could have worked out for me if I worked on me and waited a bad situation out instead of giving up.

I can't understand why you think you have only three options in life. Working in a grocery store, army or the 'Corporate world', so bizarre!

Name another real, helpful option then.

Also, what makes you think you are too good for these jobs?

I never said I was too good for them. Though the grocery store stuff, maybe but "too good" is the wrong phrase. It's not that I'm too good. It's that I've been there and done that when I was at the appropriate age and now I'm ready for something else. I know I'm capable of more. I'm not in MENSA or whatever but I know there's just got to be something more I can do.

Why do you think you're better than others that choose a career in those fields?

I don't think I'm better than others who are in those fields. Once again I never said that. Stop putting words in my mouth.

I can understand not wanting a job because you are not interested in it or you don't think you would be good at it but you act like they're beneath you, it's just so rude!
Anyways, once again your ideology of life and other human-beings is offensive!

I never said I was "too good" for the corporate world. I said it was boring.

I never said I was "too good" for the army. I said I didn't want to sign a contract saying that basically for the next however many years, I would be doing nothing else with my life except being in the army. You can't have hobbies, passions, or any kind of a life in there outside of your role. You don't get any time to yourself, not enough to really do anything except rest and wait to go back on duty. I'm tired of putting my life on hold.

And grocery stores, I've already explained. I did it once, when I was younger. I've since grown up and am more capable now. It wouldn't help me in any way. Let me put it another way - would it help you to read books at a first-grade level? Or would it help you more to read something more geared for a more mature person?

---

Ya know what, fresia it. The takeaway here is that I should have been a thieving, lying, rule-breaking, booze-and-drug-swilling tough guy. Then I wouldn't be posting my problems on a message board, because I wouldn't have any problems! That's who gets the jobs, the money, the choice of who to date. That's who life never says "no" to. But I was dumb and chose to be nice, chose to follow the rules. Or, according to some people here, I should just shrug and accept my lot in life, "life's a *****, then you die" while others get to ride a non-stop party bus cause they're the good old boys and I'm not. I guess that's what it comes down to in the end.

---

You don't need to see the words 'too good' to not see that it was implied!
I mean who on earth would write 'grocery store or something similar causes me to tremble with rage at the thought of being a hopeless victim and destroys my self-confidence replacing it with despair', 'really have no place else to go than business, even though I find it, and most people in it, as bone-dry as it gets.' And You don't mind taking a soul-sucking corporate job, because you have very little soul to lose.

You seem very bitter and from what I've read on your other posts, you have absolutely no reason to be, so what the girl didn't like you?! Get over it and stop acting like an entitled brat, that has never wanted for anything and now you are "grown up" and realise you have to work for happiness and success, you feel like that's unfair but that's bloody life, so pull your socks up and start living instead of dwelling on people that don't give a honeysuckle about you!

'The takeaway here is that I should have been a thieving, lying, rule-breaking, booze-and-drug-swilling tough guy.' You hit the nail on the head, that's exactly what we want you to be :/! What planet are you on? This wasn't even slightly implied yet you take up umbrage with me paraphrasing you when it's clearly what you mean!

My post the other day completely implies to you too ' Your holier than thou approach to life is disturbing, you are coasting through life but have the pompousness to tell others how to live their own. People should stop sugar coating the pill for people with no taste buds!

I love the words 'implies', 'implied' couldn't get enough of it in this post!

 

[barky]

Ska, I've found the only control we have in life is what we ourselves do. It's a much easier way to live if you focus on righting your own actions, and accepting that everything else will be.

Soldier on with the job search. I know how frustrating and lengthy it can be, but you'll get what you want if you continue the efforts.

 

[ladyforsaken]

Ska, you know I care about you. But I do have to say some things here.. just like what the others have said - only because we care, not because we want to fight you. So take a deep breath, calm down - we just want to try and help.

Accomplishments my ass....like I said, this guy had an alcohol and drug problem. But I guess he's the smart one. Stupid me, I should have been like him and others of his type, drinking my face off every week and stealing money from my parents to buy drugs. Obviously those are the people who get ahead.

Honestly, you should see that it's not about whether they are bad "frat-boys" type of people or not. Achieving success and the things you want are NOT based on whether you're a good guy or a bad guy! Cos I have seen both types of people either making it big or not making it at all. So basing your achievements and success in life on whether you're a good person or not just doesn't make sense to me.

I'd like to think this is all just the luck that you have in life. I'm not going to dwell and obsess about why people are making it big and I'm not - cos I'd just be wasting my time away. What I would or should focus on is how do I get what I want? Or the next best thing?

Sometimes you really just can't get what you want - because of other factors in life. Responsibilities, finances, you just have no choice - you have to live so you have to do something or anything just to get by, or you'd be putting your life on hold forever. Why waste more time in life like that when life can be unpredictably short?

I never said I was "too good" for the corporate world. I said it was boring.

I never said I was "too good" for the army. I said I didn't want to sign a contract saying that basically for the next however many years, I would be doing nothing else with my life except being in the army. You can't have hobbies, passions, or any kind of a life in there outside of your role. You don't get any time to yourself, not enough to really do anything except rest and wait to go back on duty. I'm tired of putting my life on hold.

See, some part of what you wrote here is a bit contradicting in some sense to me. Once again, I'm saying this not to pick on you, but to make you see certain things from another perspective perhaps, it might help you open your eyes, heart and mind to other possibilities besides your own set of thoughts.

You turn away those opportunities, or perhaps any other opportunity that isn't what you want - but yet you are tired of putting your life on hold. Aren't you then putting your life on hold at your own accord, by turning away all other opportunities?

You know, I'd like to think we're kinda in the same boat here, with the job search and honeysuckle. I don't want anything, but a particular career - but I need to go through a lot just to get there and I thought maybe there are shortcuts. I have realised there is no shortcut in life - unless you're lucky, lucky to know the right people, lucky to have the money, lucky to have the contacts.

And I don't have the luck. I don't think I need to be a bad person, or someone reckless and outgoing just to get what I want - heck, I'd never get there being such a person!

Or, according to some people here, I should just shrug and accept my lot in life, "life's a *****, then you die" while others get to ride a non-stop party bus cause they're the good old boys and I'm not. I guess that's what it comes down to in the end.

No no, this isn't what we're saying. Taking up opportunities that come up in life even when you don't want them, doesn't mean you're accepting your life is a failure or whatever it is that you think. It means, you're taking a step forward. When you take up an opportunity in life, you can never predict or know what other doors will open for you ahead. You'd start getting to know people at work, they might have leads or directions or help for you to go somewhere, where more doors will open.

But, if you are going to keep closing these doors before you even take a peek at what's beyond the door step, you'd never get anywhere - UNLESS, you're **** well lucky like some people are in life. Yes, I live by believing that it's mainly luck because if I start to think that it might be due to anything else - I'd probably drive myself crazy here with endlessly wondering why, why and why. *shrug* I just can't add more stress/worry to my life if I can help it.

All I'm saying about ALL OF THIS, is that here I am trying to find my way in the world, and I saw that a guy who I'd known to be a scumbag and a bad guy was coasting. Am I really that wrong for being mad about that, even just a little? Is that not even a little frustrating? Has that never happened to any of you before?

Ska, you totally need to get out there. Get out there, and see, that not only "scumbags" make it. There are a lot of good and nice people who do as well, who climb up the ladder and make it successfully out of genuine hard work and effort. And why don't you see them? Because usually these people don't need to flaunt it, or show off. They don't need to create attention on themselves. So how do you see them? Get out there, and do something to move your life forward.

An additional note:
I am unemployed, I had no direction in life, I was a bit lost to what I want to do after I quit my job few months ago. But, recently, I realised what I want to do.

But I am running out of savings. I wanted to look for a job elsewhere, so I can get away from my family and relatives and the stress and drama of it all. I've been doing just that, but now, I have no choice but to go back because they need help with the finances. How can I say no to my mother who's taken care of me well enough (to her capabilities)? I can say no to my siblings, but not to her. So again, my life is gonna be on hold, cos I can't do what I want, not yet at least, because I have other responsibilities to tend to.

You might say it's still a choice that I'm making to help my family out. Probably. But to me, when it comes to someone I truly love and care dearly about - they are never a choice to me, they are a responsibility.

I got bitter about this for a bit, having to put aside my wants, once again, for the millionth time, but it doesn't mean I'm accepting my life is honeysuckle or a failure - in fact, I'm starting to look out for other ways I can achieve what I want, in the near future. If I can't have it now, I will have it soon - but for now, I'll make do with whatever job I can find back home, even if it's something totally unrelated to what I like. Meh.

 

[Peaco]

So bored.

 

[Ymir]

Talking about work, I have an internship in a shitty workplace and I'm hating the place even more as the days go by. Each one of my friends left because of the same issue but it seems that I will be stuck with it unless I find another lab with the equipment I want.

So I'm thinking that I want to explode and never walk inside that lab again.

 

[TheRealCallie]

I'm behind for work. I wanted to finish today, but that won't happen. Doesn't help that I don't want to work, so I'm procrastinating actually doing the work. I should finish tomorrow, unless I don't get ANYTHING done today. Hopefully, we don't get an email.

 

[Cavey]

This was a huge error of judgement on my part. I should really have thought this through. Anyone who loathes family gatherings should pity me right now.

 

[VanillaCreme]

Yeah, it's open. Why? Because I'm tired of you putting him in here, even after you saying that I might not want him in here. You still put him in here. Just do it - don't comment on it like you're rubbing it in my face that you know I don't want him in here. There's multiple reasons why I don't, most of which are beyond your understanding.

 

[Arachne]

bah pining for he who is meant for me.. I need a kick up the arse..

 

[VanillaCreme]

You know how some parents want to say something like, "Oh, he's not bad. He's just misunderstood." ... Well, he's just bad. It's not that he's incapable of listening... It's just that he doesn't.

 

[Triple Bogey]

Had a great conversation with the lady customer who likes photography.
I have been waiting 2 weeks for her to come in.
I surprize myself sometimes because I can chat up a woman when I put my mind to it.
Great chat, loads of laughter and smiling. Loads of talk about photography. I told her to bring some photo's in so I can look at them.
Everything was great apart from she's got a husband. She mentioned him.
But it was a nice chat and she seems a lovely woman.

 

[TheSkaFish]

I'd like to think this is all just the luck that you have in life. I'm not going to dwell and obsess about why people are making it big and I'm not - cos I'd just be wasting my time away. What I would or should focus on is how do I get what I want? Or the next best thing?

You know, I'd like to think we're kinda in the same boat here, with the job search and honeysuckle. I don't want anything, but a particular career - but I need to go through a lot just to get there and I thought maybe there are shortcuts. I have realised there is no shortcut in life - unless you're lucky, lucky to know the right people, lucky to have the money, lucky to have the contacts.

And I don't have the luck. I don't think I need to be a bad person, or someone reckless and outgoing just to get what I want - heck, I'd never get there being such a person!

It's just, it's always been deeply important to me to know that I can become someone who is able to get what they want, someone strong, someone who isn't just in this life to get kicked around. Someone I can carry with pride and genuinely like, instead of just "getting through" life the way most people do. I agree I should focus on what I want more. But I don't want the next best thing. If that's what I get, it's a sign that I was too weak and ineffectual to get what I want and therefore I'm a victim, a loser. I need to know that's not me.

I'm not the kind of guy who gets shortcuts. But the jerks do, and by the time I get to the destination, I've found that they've gotten there first and all the good anything is already taken. That's the problem I have. If I tried acting like them, I'd be the one that gets caught. I just don't have their knack for getting away with being bad. This is especially true in the realms of money and dating. Sometimes I think, how can someone like me hope to compete against that? Is there anything I can do except watch helplessly as everything good in the world goes to the bad guys? I can't stand the thought of it but I frustrated when I don't see another way.

Ska, you totally need to get out there. Get out there, and see, that not only "scumbags" make it. There are a lot of good and nice people who do as well, who climb up the ladder and make it successfully out of genuine hard work and effort. And why don't you see them? Because usually these people don't need to flaunt it, or show off. They don't need to create attention on themselves. So how do you see them? Get out there, and do something to move your life forward.

I do wish I could see more examples of good and nice people succeeding in the world. I want to know that you can still be a nice and decent person and still triumph over the "bad boys" in the end no matter how much luck or shortcuts they get. That would encourage me that I too can make something of myself that I respect and can even like, that they aren't just going to ruin or steal whatever I manage to make out of my life so there is a point to trying yet. I guess my biggest problem is believing that it's all possible. I wish I could see a little more light at the end of the tunnel, I guess. That would help.

This is a subject which really gets to me sometimes. Thanks for listening LadyF, and that's noble of you to go home after you waited all this time. I have to say you're probably made of sterner stuff than me, I'd be tempted to stay. Best of luck to you as well.

 

[Disaffected]

Knee is finally healed enough to workout, feels goodman.

 

[VanillaCreme]

If that solo played on loop whenever I walked around, I wouldn't mind at all. That solo is the very definition of feeling music.

 

[ladyforsaken]

I'd like to think this is all just the luck that you have in life. I'm not going to dwell and obsess about why people are making it big and I'm not - cos I'd just be wasting my time away. What I would or should focus on is how do I get what I want? Or the next best thing?

You know, I'd like to think we're kinda in the same boat here, with the job search and honeysuckle. I don't want anything, but a particular career - but I need to go through a lot just to get there and I thought maybe there are shortcuts. I have realised there is no shortcut in life - unless you're lucky, lucky to know the right people, lucky to have the money, lucky to have the contacts.

And I don't have the luck. I don't think I need to be a bad person, or someone reckless and outgoing just to get what I want - heck, I'd never get there being such a person!

It's just, it's always been deeply important to me to know that I can become someone who is able to get what they want, someone strong, someone who isn't just in this life to get kicked around. Someone I can carry with pride and genuinely like, instead of just "getting through" life the way most people do. I agree I should focus on what I want more. But I don't want the next best thing. If that's what I get, it's a sign that I was too weak and ineffectual to get what I want and therefore I'm a victim, a loser. I need to know that's not me.

I'm not the kind of guy who gets shortcuts. But the jerks do, and by the time I get to the destination, I've found that they've gotten there first and all the good anything is already taken. That's the problem I have. If I tried acting like them, I'd be the one that gets caught. I just don't have their knack for getting away with being bad. This is especially true in the realms of money and dating. Sometimes I think, how can someone like me hope to compete against that? Is there anything I can do except watch helplessly as everything good in the world goes to the bad guys? I can't stand the thought of it but I frustrated when I don't see another way.

Ska, you totally need to get out there. Get out there, and see, that not only "scumbags" make it. There are a lot of good and nice people who do as well, who climb up the ladder and make it successfully out of genuine hard work and effort. And why don't you see them? Because usually these people don't need to flaunt it, or show off. They don't need to create attention on themselves. So how do you see them? Get out there, and do something to move your life forward.

I do wish I could see more examples of good and nice people succeeding in the world. I want to know that you can still be a nice and decent person and still triumph over the "bad boys" in the end no matter how much luck or shortcuts they get. That would encourage me that I too can make something of myself that I respect and can even like, that they aren't just going to ruin or steal whatever I manage to make out of my life so there is a point to trying yet. I guess my biggest problem is believing that it's all possible. I wish I could see a little more light at the end of the tunnel, I guess. That would help.

This is a subject which really gets to me sometimes. Thanks for listening LadyF, and that's noble of you to go home after you waited all this time. I have to say you're probably made of sterner stuff than me, I'd be tempted to stay. Best of luck to you as well.

Thanks. Good luck to you too. And I certainly hope you can have some faith in being good and doing good and hope you can look forward and plan your life ahead and not be too bothered about others. Just can't compare yourself to other people.