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When you notice 100% are impossible to achieve, you might wanna try 95%. But then you notice 95% is not enough and 100% is still unachievable. Why not try 80%? That's a little less hassle for you and after all, the consequence is the same: Not enough.

It doesn't matter how much you lack as long as you do lack. Why not aim even lower? 70%, 50%, 1%...it won't matter. The beauty of unreal expectations.
 
Can't believe I'm back in work tomorrow. Sadness.


Eddie Jordan is such an idiot.
 
What do you mean I have pneumonia, and need blinking antibiotics.. What I need is to get better and do some yoga.
 
"Social justice warrior" is the new way of saying "n****r lover", if you've ever read To Kill a Mockingbird. Racists, homophobes, misogynists, and sadistic bullies who prey on the weak ******* love throwing around this term. We need more than just social justice warriors, we need social justice rebels, crusaders and assassins. An SJW is a good thing to be. Sure beats being a Hitler-worshipper.
 
Aisha said:
I understand that so well- the fear that stops you even trying because you come to the realization that no matter how hard you try you will at best be less than average. Or mediocre as you say. It's certainly a self-fulfilling prophecy- the curse of ineptitude through lack of self-confidence. But I guess it's like everyone says, if you don't try you will never know. It's just that life lessons like that aren't the easiest to learn until you experience them yourself. Especially when they involve confronting fear and anxiety. That can be more crippling than almost anything else. Conquering something of that nature has to be a process. I don't think it can happen overnight, but I'm glad for us both that we have started dealing with it even to a degree.
I'm slowly learning to face my fears now. It's two steps forward and one step back for me as of yet but at least that still leaves me one step ahead of where I was, so I'm staying positive. Having guidance and support is always a good thing. I will hopefully try out art next year as well. I hope you can take it up again and maybe you could share your art when you do. :)

Yeah. I have to say, I'm quite amazed at how well you articulated the problem I've been having:

"...the fear that stops you even trying because you come to the realization that no matter how hard you try you will at best be less than average. Or mediocre as you say. It's certainly a self-fulfilling prophecy- the curse of ineptitude through lack of self-confidence."

It's been this fear (as well as stress from other things in life) that's been keeping me from playing guitar or working on my story. It's not that I've stopped wanting to do those things. It's this fear I have, the fear of finding out I'm too mediocre to ever be good at it. Because I've never felt talented or special, I've been afraid that I just wasn't good enough. Because I'm afraid, I don't try. Because I haven't tried, I haven't accumulated any skill. And when I do try, with only the small amount of skill I have, I attribute it to "not being good enough".

I guess I need to remember that it is a false assumption, and that it isn't that I am "bad" at whatever it is I'm trying to do - but rather, inexperienced. It reminded me of this picture I saw on the Internet once telling people not to give up when learning something. It said we are hard on ourselves because our taste is already good, but our experience level needs to catch up.

Anyway. I'm glad you're staying positive about it. I need to get into the habit of that, myself. I find I'm better able to be positive when I'm not stressing, when my mind is clear. I'm sure I'll post my pictures up here sometime and hopefully you will too :)
 
Triple Bogey said:
red guy said:
Another 10 hours left in the day with no plans. And tomorrow back to work.

Next week make some plans on your day off.
Even if it's only going for a walk.

Well sometimes I go to the movies and stuff like that. Other times I'm just sick and tired to go alone. So might as well stay home.
 
I need to find more interesting things to do and to talk about. I need to actually do some of these things on my to-do list, I need to actually live by some of these quotes I look up. I can't just sit on the Internet all day, I won't get a life that way. I made that mistake before where I spent too much time online, and as a result, I didn't really advance any of my goals or interests and had little to talk about or show for myself. But the thing is, usually I find ideas for new things to think or talk about, or what to do with my life from browsing the Internet.

This is the paradox that takes up so much of my thoughts. I guess the answer is balance, but it feels so confusing sometimes.
 
TheSkaFish said:
I need to find more interesting things to do and to talk about. I need to actually do some of these things on my to-do list, I need to actually live by some of these quotes I look up. I can't just sit on the Internet all day, I won't get a life that way.

You're not wrong.

I have this permalink saved and I've been going back to it quite a bit over these last few weeks.
The phenomenom of poor time management does not exist.

A few quotes from there.

The phenomena of poor time management does not exist. Rather, it is your inability to understand and focus on what you truly want at this very moment in life. The reason why we struggle with this is because in our heads we have a huge list of **** we want to work on and this gets overwhelming. You want to do all of them, and you want to get started on all of them as soon as possible, but you don't. Why? It's not because you don't have TIME, or can't manage your TIME, but because you cant manage THIS HUGE BALL OF **** stuck in your head. It's too overwhelming, it's too messy, it's unorganized, full of crap, full of genius, and has no boundaries.

Your problem is not that you can't manage your time, it's that you are not passionate enough about one thing (or multiple things) to sit down and work on it without even thinking about it (it should be a reflex).

Remember the time when you were a child, between the ages of 9 and 13. You didn't give a flying **** about time management. You took every risk, jumped at every opportunity, weren't afraid to learn and try new things every single day. Older people doubted you but you didn't give a ****, you did it anyway, you had the time of your life doing it, and you succeeded. Time was never an issue. You just did what you loved/wanted to do, and everything just seemed to fall into place.

Go back to that time. That mindset. And everything will fall into place.

The rest is basically an outline of a method to help overcome the problem and start doing the things that you want to do.
 
kamya said:
You're not wrong.

I have this permalink saved and I've been going back to it quite a bit over these last few weeks.
The phenomenom of poor time management does not exist.

Thanks, I'll check it out. Overwhelming, messy, and unorganized is exactly how I feel most days. My mind feels as though it is tangled up in knots. I wonder if it is a contributing factor to these annoying thoughts I have, which have bothered me off and on these past several years.

It's a mix of feeling overwhelmed and intimidated by things I HAVE to do, as well as things I WANT to do. It's kinda like I was explaining in my post earlier in this thread about having anxiety about being good enough.
 
TheSkaFish said:
Thanks, I'll check it out. Overwhelming, messy, and unorganized is exactly how I feel most days. My mind feels as though it is tangled up in knots. I wonder if it is a contributing factor to these annoying thoughts I have, which have bothered me off and on these past several years.

It's a mix of feeling overwhelmed and intimidated by things I HAVE to do, as well as things I WANT to do. It's kinda like I was explaining in my post earlier in this thread about having anxiety about being good enough.

Yeah you definitely aren't alone when it comes to these issues. I can really relate. It's tough to figure it all out and decide what you priorities are. Then actually execute it all somehow.
 
I'm tired of being constantly tired because of this chronic anemia and those other issues.. you'd think I'd know to be a compliant patient. I just want to lie down and not get up, but there's so much to do, especially in the next four weeks. If I get through the second week of december without a panic attack, it'll be a miracle.
 
so now I just have to a) find a temporary flat b) buy a (cheap) car c) find a permanent flat
and then I am all set
 
I am so relieved to hear from a cyber friend that i've been talking to every day for 2 years and then .................nothing, although I knew she had been sick and having biopsies etc. I thought she was a gonner.
She had been rushed into hospital, very ill and obviously out of it, but now she's feeling a bit better and able to communicate again.
I'm thinking i'm so happy that she's ok and wondering why we cry when we're happy. Another of life's little mysteries!
 

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