why do guys always say this stuff to me why compare me to others

[Lonely in BC]

O.K. then Irish-lady, maybe you'd be open to some ideas.

In your last response to me you indicated that you "have no agenda or criteria just random selection like lucky bag or dip"- when I read that it indicates to me that you really haven't thought about what you want in a potential boyfriend. Have you spent any serious time (beyond day-dreaming) of what you really want in a mate?

A friend of mine joined a dating service many years ago. Something he said about the process has always stuck in in my mind- as he was going through the questionnaire that was required to join the site he indicated to me that it truly made him think about what he really wanted in a relationship. He was in his late thirties at the time and he was completely shocked to discover that many of his previous relationships would have never met his hopes, dreams, and desires. Happily for him he found a wonderful girl, they have two adorable daughters, and he feels loved. I mention this because maybe you should consider something like this. I'm not saying you'll find the love of your life this way but it may help you to understand what you really want.

 

[unlucky in life]

i wish i was dead i hate my life i hate my mother i have no friends ,never had boyfriend ,never had job ,i can't get driver licence
stuck in dead end with nothing to do and no where to go . i have cold bitch for mother and father doesn't listen to me .


my distinctly is commit suicide i tried before i think i should try again .all i have every been is un happy and alone .

now my father wants to move middle of no where worse place then i am already in . my mother doesn't care i hate i will always hate her


I REALLY WISH I WAS DEAD I REALLY DO I,D BE BETTER OFF DEAD

 

[Sci-Fi]

Stop focusing on ALL the negative in your life, that is all you ever do. People here have asked you questions about yourself in the past at a chance to get to know YOU, instead of all this negative you always post about yourself and your life. You have ignored them, you have ignored your chance at making friends even if just online.

Suicide is never the answer. Start looking for better things and stop obsessing over all the negative or you'll always be stuck in this rut you put yourself in. It isn't healthy. No matter how bad you think your life is, it isn't that bad to take your own life. Forget about all these guys who insult you, forget about these guys who chase after women, forget about these people you always refer to as "top models". Forget about obsessing over other peoples lives and focus on your own. Just you, no relationships, no wishing you had or could be like the other people you surround yourself with. Just focus on making the best of what you have and enjoying life, your own for a change and not others.

 

[unlucky in life]

Stop focusing on ALL the negative in your life, that is all you ever do. People here have asked you questions about yourself in the past at a chance to get to know YOU, instead of all this negative you always post about yourself and your life. You have ignored them, you have ignored your chance at making friends even if just online.

Suicide is never the answer. Start looking for better things and stop obsessing over all the negative or you'll always be stuck in this rut you put yourself in. It isn't healthy. No matter how bad you think your life is, it isn't that bad to take your own life. Forget about all these guys who insult you, forget about these guys who chase after women, forget about these people you always refer to as "top models". Forget about obsessing over other peoples lives and focus on your own. Just you, no relationships, no wishing you had or could be like the other people you surround yourself with. Just focus on making the best of what you have and enjoying life, your own for a change and not others.

i can't make my life better i jsut you don't know what my lif is life no idea no future none i hate my life i hate

you don't know what its like for me
i have nothing and no future i live in dead end town with nothing to do.
i have no one to talk to no one .i apped for 200 jobs no reply .
i added weird shallow guy on Facebook who have life i wish i had
he never meet me or saw me and you see what he did to me he didn;t want to know me and blocked me for full 1 year and 6 months nealy 2 years
i have so called friends on Facebook who even acknowledged my extence i am going delete them
now i have move in middle of no where in countryside with less then i have
i never had boyfriends and never will or my 1st kiss
i have asthma ,weight problem .short eye sight ,
i have no money either
there are no jobs
i have to travel 40 miles or 64.37km to buy pair of shoes 40 miles i can't even move 40 miles it might as well be another bloody country

my cold bitch of mother doesn't care i hate her i have very life i hate this expression hand you you got well i got bloody raw or there scum out there who are living in luxury while likes have nothing . where are the positives its not for lack trying i am tried of tring making effort its waste ot time soon enough i will no internet

now you tell where positives are i see none only dark hole

 

[Sci-Fi]

No one knows what your life is like, we aren't living it. We can only pull from our experiences. A lot of people here haven't had it easy either, we are trying to use what we've learned and pass that on to you. Yes you can make your life better, just stop focusing on all the negative things. You either enjoy what you can in your life or live one of self pity. Everyone has a future, you just have to find it and head towards it.

 

[unlucky in life]

No one knows what your life is like, we aren't living it. We can only pull from our experiences. A lot of people here haven't had it easy either, we are trying to use what we've learned and pass that on to you. Yes you can make your life better, just stop focusing on all the negative things. You either enjoy what you can in your life or live one of self pity. Everyone has a future, you just have to find it and head towards it.

i was suppose to have died as child i wish i had if i knew what to face now dead is better i can not enjoy my self and my brother are both miserable
both have nothing none have freinds ,we have social life either .
we hate where we live and always will.

how enjoy nothing in life how . nothing to look forward i put my photo on facbook for 2 weeks no person added not one . now do you see i can't you see i could not make Dublin city born guy see no body sees no body

 

[Dark_Poet]

Dear Unlucky:

Please take some deep breaths. I can sense how much you hurt, but at the same time, you really are hurting yourself right now.
It's okay to be upset. Its okay to hurt. But like others have said, you honestly make your life that much harder by only living in the past.

If you only focus on what happened, how can you ever move forward? This place is for lonely people such as yourself. I've had really bad experiences with females. I even had one that traumatized me when I was younger. Now it is difficult to even make eye contact with girls sometimes.

However, I don't blame women in general because of a couple of jerks. We will always run into people who will make us sad at some point. It's inevitable. One of the great things about human beings is our strength to grow. I hope none of this sounds arrogant or ugly, because its just not my intention.

I want you to think about this. You have the power to overcome all the hurdles in your life and become more than anyone that has ever hurt you. You can use this pain that has been inflicted upon you and use it as a inspiration to help others not feel that way.
Think of the gift that you can give to someone who feels just like you by simply relating to how someone else feels.

Sometimes, it can mean the world just to have someone to listen too. Its going to be okay Unlucky. Just remember that you're capable of being wanted and loved. It just may take some time for that to happen. You just have to be patient.

Thanks for listening

 

[unlucky in life]

Dear Unlucky:

Please take some deep breaths. I can sense how much you hurt, but at the same time, you really are hurting yourself right now.
It's okay to be upset. Its okay to hurt. But like others have said, you honestly make your life that much harder by only living in the past.

If you only focus on what happened, how can you ever move forward? This place is for lonely people such as yourself. I've had really bad experiences with females. I even had one that traumatized me when I was younger. Now it is difficult to even make eye contact with girls sometimes.

However, I don't blame women in general because of a couple of jerks. We will always run into people who will make us sad at some point. It's inevitable. One of the great things about human beings is our strength to grow. I hope none of this sounds arrogant or ugly, because its just not my intention.

I want you to think about this. You have the power to overcome all the hurdles in your life and become more than anyone that has ever hurt you. You can use this pain that has been inflicted upon you and use it as a inspiration to help others not feel that way.
Think of the gift that you can give to someone who feels just like you by simply relating to how someone else feels.

Sometimes, it can mean the world just to have someone to listen too. Its going to be okay Unlucky. Just remember that you're capable of being wanted and loved. It just may take some time for that to happen. You just have to be patient.

Thanks for listening

emotional and physical locked in box with no escape . guys just hate me the reason is unknown to me for years .i just i have no luck with them
i pick guys who don't like me i mean don't like me .i don't know what to do i really don't

 

[Dark_Poet]

I understand that.

Listen. I hope this doesn't sound harsh, but you honestly are not in a position to date right now.
I really feel like that even if you meet the man of your dreams, you'll only be waiting for him to hurt you simply to validate your beliefs that no man could ever like you.

The problem with that mentality, is the more negative you become, the more likely you set yourself up to failure.
I'm not saying you're not capable of being in a loving relationship, but, are you really capable of handling the sorrow that comes with a relationship?

So, I really want you to think about some of the ideas I've set with you. Don't think about men right now. Think about what you can do to make you happy. Once you find out about yourself and form a more loving relationship with who you are, then perhaps start thinking about men once more.

Just remember that men are just as prone to being mean as women. We come in all shapes, sizes, and colors. You have to wade through the jerks to find someone who truly understands you and wants to be with you eternally. There is hope for you. Just try and use some of the tools I and others have given you and learn to love who you are first.

Thanks for listening

 

[Lonely in BC]

Here's an idea for you Irish-filly,

Leave.

When I say that I mean leave the life that is currently making you so dreadfully unhappy and find one that does. Living with your family doesn't seem to be doing you or them a dam bit of good. If the move you indicated your father wants to make happens it further isolates you from any kind of rewarding life.

Here's a plan. Get up. Shut off your computer. Pack your possessions and put the really meaningful stuff into storage, then sell, donate, or give away the things that own you. Pack a comfortable bag (such as a backpack) with a few clothes, your toothbrush and other essentials, a camera, put on a warm jacket, and leave. It doesn't matter if you walk, catch a bus, or hitchhike- just go out and start an adventure. You can stay in hostels pretty cheaply (surely Ireland has them), head to a city where there are opportunites and make a life there. Maybe you'll want to keep moving.

Many of us have done just that sort of thing in one way or another to leave an unbearable life and start a new one. You're wasting your life letting the current taking you in whatever direction it wishes.

Nothing is going to happen for you unless you make it happen.

 

[Tiina63]

I agree with Lonely in BC. Leaving your present situation is probably the best solution. Though I think that you will need to make some sort of plans first, though. Could you go online and search for a course or for a job that will get you away from home?

 

[unlucky in life]

yes that is only problem of many but what i need to now how will stop meeting guys who hate me and no respect for me
they better looking girls all because they attractive i am not i don't why this happens me please help i don't understand the male Brain


please help me please with open thread question please

 

[Lonely in BC]

yes that is only problem of many but what i need to now how will stop meeting guys who hate me and no respect for me
they better looking girls all because they attractive i am not i don't why this happens me please help i don't understand the male Brain


please help me please with open thread question please

I can't figure out the male brain either and I've been dealing with one for 45 years. My spouse urges me not to use it too much as I might wear it out or hurt it

 

[unlucky in life]

yes that is only problem of many but what i need to now how will stop meeting guys who hate me and no respect for me
they better looking girls all because they attractive i am not i don't why this happens me please help i don't understand the male Brain


please help me please with open thread question please

I can't figure out the male brain either and I've been dealing with one for 45 years. My spouse urges me not to use it too much as I might wear it out or hurt it

ha ha very funny . i really need help

who said men are simple have meet the pricks i have meet i have dealt with have ruined my life as female who has no appeal nothing to offer its seem in comparison to girls i am waste of time and energy what wrong with me really what wrong i have through a lot pain that's all i get in pain and rejection guys who are super shallow and heartless towards me
ONLY ME ALWAYS ME

 

[Dark_Poet]

yes that is only problem of many but what i need to now how will stop meeting guys who hate me and no respect for me
they better looking girls all because they attractive i am not i don't why this happens me please help i don't understand the male Brain


please help me please with open thread question please

The best way for you to stop meeting guys who will hurt you right now is to stop looking for men to date altogether. You need to love yourself first Unlucky. It is truly the key here. Its not impossible that you won't find someone who loves you, but you won't be as willing to accept it if you did find someone who wanted you right now. You may even be so reserved thinking that he will hurt you that you won't give him the love and affection you'd like to express.

All in all, its important for you to understand that you need to love yourself right now. We may never have all the answers to all the questions we'd truly like to know.

Please take some of this to heart Unlucky.

Someone will love you one day, but you have to be ready for it. You have to be ready to love yourself first. Spend time getting to know what makes you tick. Learn what you love to do. Volunteer somewhere and make a better life for yourself. Make Unlucky lucky by more than just luck. Make her lucky because she fought hard and deserved every magnificent comment that comes her way. In a way, you are truly blessed.

This is how I look at the my life. Those of us that have had to struggle for something we truly want, will appreciate it more than those who haven't.
It will happen one day Unlucky. Just remember that it all starts with the person in the mirror. You can do this, just take one step at a time. Make a list of goals that you'd like to achieve in your lifetime. Then, arrange them in a list with the most likely to achieve first.

Think about what steps it will take to reach those goals. Reaching your goals will not only help you further yourself in life, but it will help you to feel better about yourself in the long run. Its going to be ok Unlucky. (hug)

Thanks for listening.

 

[unlucky in life]

yes that is only problem of many but what i need to now how will stop meeting guys who hate me and no respect for me
they better looking girls all because they attractive i am not i don't why this happens me please help i don't understand the male Brain


please help me please with open thread question please

The best way for you to stop meeting guys who will hurt you right now is to stop looking for men to date altogether. You need to love yourself first Unlucky. It is truly the key here. Its not impossible that you won't find someone who loves you, but you won't be as willing to accept it if you did find someone who wanted you right now. You may even be so reserved thinking that he will hurt you that you won't give him the love and affection you'd like to express.

All in all, its important for you to understand that you need to love yourself right now. We may never have all the answers to all the questions we'd truly like to know.

Please take some of this to heart Unlucky.

Someone will love you one day, but you have to be ready for it. You have to be ready to love yourself first. Spend time getting to know what makes you tick. Learn what you love to do. Volunteer somewhere and make a better life for yourself. Make Unlucky lucky by more than just luck. Make her lucky because she fought hard and deserved every magnificent comment that comes her way. In a way, you are truly blessed.

This is how I look at the my life. Those of us that have had to struggle for something we truly want, will appreciate it more than those who haven't.
It will happen one day Unlucky. Just remember that it all starts with the person in the mirror. You can do this, just take one step at a time. Make a list of goals that you'd like to achieve in your lifetime. Then, arrange them in a list with the most likely to achieve first.

Think about what steps it will take to reach those goals. Reaching your goals will not only help you further yourself in life, but it will help you to feel better about yourself in the long run. Its going to be ok Unlucky. (hug)

Thanks for listening.

very very hard to forget the hurt and pain they caused me they get away it which makes my pain and hurt far worse .i end up alone with nothing they end up chasing others girls while i am in hurt and pain its as real yesterday they said it .they was no need to do what they did to me no need at all very viscous i keep be lonely and suffer while end up happy depsite what they say .


i can't love my self the pain is too much .while they get to know other girls they like i end alone getting to no one no one wants

they always clicking other girls photos they given other girls compliments i have got one my life all i have ever got is verbal abuse and threats thats all i have evr gotten .its doesn't seem fair the like of me who has done nothing wrong keep suffer they get away with it like they did nothing wrong they is just no fairness none its just not not not fair

 

[Dark_Poet]

We all have scars, we all have pain. I know its not easy. I'm not asking you to forget, I'm asking you to slowly forgive.
Don't forgive them for them, do it for you.

Don't let them own you your whole life. Misfortune happens in all areas of our life. The trick is to learn from it and build on it so that you grow as a person. What about if you wrote poetry about your experiences in life Unlucky? Turn mean and hurtful things that have happened into beautiful words of sorrow. Maybe you could write songs. You could turn something that is very clearly painful into something you can use to benefit both yourself and possibly others.

It might be something you find out you really enjoy and maybe even knack for. I would like for you to think about how many people have offered you suggestions on this forum alone. We don't know you more than what you've shared with us, and while I haven't seen every post ever made, I've seen people who have cared and offered thoughtful advice.

That has to count for something right?

Take this to heart Unlucky. Its okay to be upset sometimes, just remember that you can do this. You just have to keep fighting.

 

[unlucky in life]

We all have scars, we all have pain. I know its not easy. I'm not asking you to forget, I'm asking you to slowly forgive.
Don't forgive them for them, do it for you.

Don't let them own you your whole life. Misfortune happens in all areas of our life. The trick is to learn from it and build on it so that you grow as a person. What about if you wrote poetry about your experiences in life Unlucky? Turn mean and hurtful things that have happened into beautiful words of sorrow. Maybe you could write songs. You could turn something that is very clearly painful into something you can use to benefit both yourself and possibly others.

It might be something you find out you really enjoy and maybe even knack for. I would like for you to think about how many people have offered you suggestions on this forum alone. We don't know you more than what you've shared with us, and while I haven't seen every post ever made, I've seen people who have cared and offered thoughtful advice.

That has to count for something right?

Take this to heart Unlucky. Its okay to be upset sometimes, just remember that you can do this. You just have to keep fighting.

guys that i interact with or interact with all macho guy with no respect for women and think women are sex objects for there pleasures they call me names because they don't like what i say .i was online again another guy called me bitch he didn't know me either .all because i ask to show some respect to me what they say to me .they expect accepted there hurtful verbal abuse and be good girl i take it . i understand these guys don't have mother or some thing complete ****** bags i then attract complete scum bags is all i can all them . all because i asked for some rerect and show some manners is all

 

[Drama]

Hi unlucky

 

[VanillaCreme]

WHY MALES ALWAYS TELL ME I AM WORTHLESS AND COMPARE TO ANY WOMAN IN WORLD AS LONGS AS ITS NOT ME THEY WANT

Because you see yourself as worthless. If you read back to all your previous posts and threads, you'd see how much you put yourself down. If you do that to yourself, don't be shocked if others do it to you. I'm never going to be a model, and I'm never going to be pretty, but I don't put myself down.