Why Do You Think That So Many Marriages Fail These Days?

[EveWasFramed]

Sorry, Eve. I was in a pissy mood, and jumped all over you. It wasn't you, it's completely me.

To answer your question...

Im wondering if there is a correlation between experience versus non-experience, as to how people see the issue.

Probably yes, and probably no.

People that have been in good marriages and relationships are more likely to defend marriage. People that are jaded from bad relationships and marriages, or those who are jaded for other reasons, are more likely to be disparaging towards marriage in general.

It's basically opinions, not facts. What you're getting here are people's opinions, and they can vary from "marriage is good" (for those who have been in good situations), to "marriage is bad" (for those who are, again, biased.)

Actually, my last comment wasn't aimed at you at all, Muse.
But anyway...Im not really asking why people either do or do not support the idea of marriage...just wondering about people's opinions on what makes one fail or succeed, relative to their experience in the matter.

 

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

You're asking something that nobody has the answer to.

If people knew why their marriages fail, they would work harder to make sure that it doesn't happen. Sometimes it's not that clear.

I have a friend. He got married at the age of 23. At first, him and his wife were very happy; they were both extroverted, happy people who were career driven and wanted a family.

Within the course of three years, his wife suddenly changed. She became reclusive, she didn't want him to have female friends, and she was constantly jealous. She also gave up on the idea of kids, because she wanted puppies and cats. She also started showing signs of bipolar disorder, where she was having mood disorders and fragmented, completely bizarre thoughts.

They are no longer together, because she changed because of a supposed mental illness. Now, does this mean that she could have gotten help, and everything would have gone back to the way it was before? Yes, that is entirely possible. But very unlikely, because she didn't want to change, and he had to move on.

 

[EveWasFramed]

Well...in that case, it seems a very logical reason caused their split - not the usual things you might hear.... fell out of love, etc.

 

[LeaningIntoTheMuse]

Logical except for him. He was a mess for a while, because she just went mental.

I just think relationship problems are usually something that we can observe, but can't comment on. I've been given enough feedback on here to determine why I'm single, yet I know it's not all that, because all of the feedback I've gotten has not been true at one time or another...and I've still been rejected.

Sometimes people just aren't compatible. Some might fall out of love, but what IS love? I'd argue that it is a chemical reaction in our brain, and nothing more.

 

[Garbageman]

I think its a mix of many different reasons. I remember years ago someone explained their theory as to the cause, I found it interesting enough to remember all these years, although I am not sure how much it actually plays a role.

He blamed it on perfume and cologne, and all scented products dulling our sense of smell. He said humans like animals release pheromones which are detectable through scent, and we rely on those scents to help find a compatible mate. When you disguise those smells and replace them with fake scents you fool the brains of your perspective mates.

He also said that because of our diet of processed foods that we produce foul odors which is a major factor in peoples usage of deodorant and perfumes.

Somehow I don't think it a huge factor, but I suppose its possible.

 

[CatGirl]

Marriages fail because of so many different reasons.

Lack of communication makes it very difficult to keep a relationship together. Relationships need constant communication and interaction.

It's important to "fall in love" over and over again. You could go on dates, have more dinners together, watch movies together or go on a vacation. You have to keep the romance alive, the same romance that caused the two of you to start a relationship.

Marriage is a commitment. When you marry someone, you promise to love them no matter what, and 50% of marriages seem to forget this step.

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