Those studies probably didn't take into consideration the people who struggle with religious OCD / scrupulosity, which makes life hell. I know cause I've had it for several years and I've been in several online groups for people with this disorder. Not only does it cause constant doubt and anxiety, but it makes existence virtually impossible because you start questioning everything about God and your actions. Oh, the stories I've read in those groups on Facebook and Reddit...
So, God wants a relationship with humanity that resembles Stockholm Syndrome? He forces us into existing against our will, tells us that life will be rough (despite the fact that He is omnipotent and could spare us the hardships), let's us wallow in suffering for decades, and expects us to learn to love Him during our suffering. And all this happens under the threat of eternal torment in hell if we fail to love Him. If this isn't some messed up Hunger Games type of dictatorship, I don't know what it is.
Your anger towards God is apparent Constantine and a common reaction from some people who have struggled with hard lives. And yet, there are hundreds of millions of poor, starving, imprisoned, disabled, or otherwise hurting individuals that embrace God despite their problems. My best friend is one who is missing legs, fingers, and organs, requires a lift system to even get out of bed into his wheelchair, suffers from constant pain, lack of energy from dialysis, and routine hospital visits from frequent infections. His physical body is a wreck and his life severely limited, yet he knows and loves the Lord and has a peace and hope in life that is enviable. How can that be? It's not because of his misguided Catholic Church upbringing, agnostic family members, failed career, or physical hardships that God's inflicted upon him. And even though he still counts his blessings each day, it's certainly not for the good life God's given him. Why then? Let me give a Christian answer that applies to you and everyone reading this thread.
We don't or shouldn't love God for what we want, hope, or expect him to do for us. He's not a vending machine where we ask for things and respond favorably if he obliges. That attitude, as many people hold, is an ungenuine faith that won't last when tested with problems or prayers seemingly unanswered.
I believe that the evidence for God in the world around us is obvious and overwhelming and that logic dictates we accept that reality not because we like it, but because its true.
I also believe that the Bible's scientific, historical, archaeological, and prophetic evidence supports its Divine inspiration and authority. It is the ultimate objective truth to determine our world view and guide our lives.
If that be the case, we recognize that the God who created all things, controls all things, and who's nature is all knowing, all powerful, holy, and righteous deserves (and demands) our fear, honor, and obedience. That was enough for mankind's first 4000 years on earth, but Christ's coming changed the situation. We no longer love God solely out of fear or hope for immediate blessings, but because God loved us first. To reconcile man's sin and rejection of God, he provided himself as a perfect sacrifice through Jesus' brutal torture and death on the cross - an unprecedented, unconditional act of love for all mankind. So now, my friend Jim, me, and other Christians don't love God based upon how nicely he blesses our lives and answers our prayers, but because he loved us enough to die for us.
To those that embrace the Gospel message (good news) of Christianity and appreciate the significance of Jesus' resurrection, a peace for living in this temporary life and fallen world can be had. Even more so, to those accepting the loving gift of grace that God's offered through Jesus' death and payment for our sins, salvation is assured, giving us a joy and hope for the future new body, life, and world more glorious than we can ever imagine.
In short, God deserves our fear, honor, respect, and love for many reasons. And while false religion experiences, tough life circumstances, and unanswered questions can make one question his goodness, power, or plan, understand that the story's not over yet. In the end, justice will be done for all, and those who truly love God will be rewarded in ways that far outweigh any of our problems in this short, temporary life. I think we should consider this life a training ground to shape our character and grow our souls. That may seem unfair for those facing hardships, but God's got all of eternity to make it up to us and I believe he will.