Corrupt the wish game.

[Lost Drifter]

Granted, but without him you wouldn’t be here (on this forum) now.

I wish there were more midgets in the world.

 

[swanlake]

Granted, but, you will have to lower all shelves in the world.

I wish banana growing is banned.

 

[Arsenic Queen]

Granted, but without him you wouldn’t be here (on this forum) now.

I wish there were more midgets in the world.

Very true. I made a lot of great friends after that series of mistakes.
Why midgets??

Granted, but, you will have to lower all shelves in the world.

I wish banana growing is banned.

Granted, but then all banana products in the world become high priced rarity. A black market of bananas get created which drives everyone crazy and you become considered #1 responsible for this mischief and thrown in jail.

I wish I had a private plane and a pilot. For free. So I could go wherever I want or move away from my life and start over far-far-away, and change my mind the next morning if I want to.

 

[swanlake]

Granted, you will have your private plane and a pilot for free, but, the plane will never land anywhere ever. You will only see other cities and countries through the window of the plane and your pilot will be an ******* and you will not like him/her.

I wish I had a cleaning person.

 

[Lost Drifter]

Granted but the cleaning person accuses you of some outrageous tabloid grabbing sex scandal then takes a pee in your favourite tea pot before eating all your biscuits.

I wish my company would give me a pay raise.

 

[WishingWell]

Wish Granted, but two days later they lay you off.

I wish I my husband didn't die.

 

[VideoVidiVisum]

Granted, but he would become a complete stranger.

I wish I wasn't working on my day off.

 

[Lost Drifter]

Granted but on that day off aliens land and zombies raise with your workplace being the only safe zone. If you’re not there you’re toast.

I wish people were friendlier to each other.

 

[Felix]

Granted but now everyone has to grab each others genitals instead of using a hand shake or a kiss and if you don't do it people avoid you and spit on you.

I wish I had a bazooka who shoots chocolate ice cream.

 

[swanlake]

Granted but now everyone has to grab each others genitals instead of using a hand shake or a kiss and if you don't do it people avoid you and spit on you.

I wish I had a bazooka who shoots chocolate ice cream.

Granted, but all of the ice cream will end up in my freezer.

I want a new wrist watch.

 

[Felix]

Granted but now everyone has to grab each others genitals instead of using a hand shake or a kiss and if you don't do it people avoid you and spit on you.

I wish I had a bazooka who shoots chocolate ice cream.

Granted, but all of the ice cream will end up in my freezer.

I want a new wrist watch.

You get the watch, but it shows the time on Pluto. And people make fun of you for wearing it.

I wish Janis Joplin and Jimmy Hendrix came back to life and played a concert in my backyard.

 

[Jilted John]

Granted,but you die at an early age at the after show party,due to booze and drugs.

I wish I had a champagne fountain in my living room.

 

[swanlake]

Granted, but, it will overflow all over your floor, ruin your furniture and the champagne will be cheap and give you a headache.

I wish my hair would stop turning gray.

 

[Felix]

Your hair stops turning grey but now it has a weird color that kills other people when they see it.The special forces shoot you with a sniper rifle in the head to prevent you from killing more people.

I wish I had the streinght to lift a boening 757.

 

[swanlake]

Granted, but, once you lift the boening your body will not move and you will have to hold it for the remainder of your life.

I wish I could give Felix my memories of seeing Jimi Hendrix and Janis Joplin live so that he no longer has to wish they come back to life and play in his backyard

 

[whispers]

Granted, but with those memories, come all of your memories, and felix will be able to blackmail you with his knowledge of your life.


I wish i would stop sweating in the night

 

[Arsenic Queen]

Granted, but instead you sweat twice as much all day.

I wish my sight was perfect (not need glasses)

 

[swanlake]

Granted, your sight is perfect you don't wear glasses, but, Black Birds attack you, peck your eyeballs and you need to get glass eyes.

I want to go to the beach NOW.

 

[whispers]

Granted, but right now the beach is invaded by seagulls leaving inches of bird **** on the once hot sand.

i wish i had a private chef

 

[Felix]

You get a private chef but everything he cooks gives you diarrhea so you have to fire him and he gets mad and throws your computer in your toilet.

I wish Jim Carrey was my friend.