Questions for the Women

[BeyondShy]

You haven't met the right men, then.

With any luck maybe he will.

 

[SofiasMami]

You haven't met the right men, then.

With any luck maybe he will.

lol - yes I saw on JHK's profile that he's a male after I commented.

Since this is a Questions for the Women thread and I have some ovaries and boobs - allow me to say that there are a number of considerate men in this world. And I'll leave it at that.

-Teresa

 

[JHK]

You haven't met the right men, then.

With any luck maybe he will.

lol - yes I saw on JHK's profile that he's a male after I commented.

Since this is a Questions for the Women thread and I have some ovaries and boobs - allow me to say that there are a number of considerate men in this world. And I'll leave it at that.

-Teresa

Haha I hope I don't meet them. Not that I have issus with gays, but that would be awkard for sure.
I just meant that sexually, most men don't really give a women exactly what SHE needs. Sex tends to mostly focus on the male needs and women tend to get left behind, which is unfair. If you are with someone, it should be just as important they get as much enjoyment out of sex as the male does.

 

[ardour]

Haha I hope I don't meet them. Not that I have issus with gays, but that would be awkard for sure.
I just meant that sexually, most men don't really give a women exactly what SHE needs. Sex tends to mostly focus on the male needs and women tend to get left behind, which is unfair. If you are with someone, it should be just as important they get as much enjoyment out of sex as the male does.

I don't know what society you grew up in but in the west "the male's" sexual desires are often framed in negative ways. Even penetrative sex is viewed as inherently problematic now in certain circles (nevermind the necessity for reproduction).

 

[JHK]

Haha I hope I don't meet them. Not that I have issus with gays, but that would be awkard for sure.
I just meant that sexually, most men don't really give a women exactly what SHE needs. Sex tends to mostly focus on the male needs and women tend to get left behind, which is unfair. If you are with someone, it should be just as important they get as much enjoyment out of sex as the male does.

I don't know what society you grew up in but in the west "the male's" sexual desires are often framed in negative ways. Even penetrative sex is viewed as inherently problematic now in certain circles (nevermind the necessity for reproduction).

What society? I live in western Canada so...
I'm not sure I'm following...

 

[ardour]

What society? I live in western Canada so...
I'm not sure I'm following...

Educated, middle class society (?) There's this attitude within feminism, spilling out into the culture, that 'normal' intercourse is unsatisfying and often demeaning for women, best replaced by other acts altogether.

 

[Paraiyar]

What society? I live in western Canada so...
I'm not sure I'm following...

Educated, middle class society (?) There's this attitude within feminism, spilling out into the culture, that 'normal' intercourse is unsatisfying and often demeaning for women, best replaced by other acts altogether.

Lol and then there is Andre Dworkin who said that all heterosexual acts are rape.

---

You haven't met the right men, then.

With any luck maybe he will.

lol - yes I saw on JHK's profile that he's a male after I commented.

Since this is a Questions for the Women thread and I have some ovaries and boobs - allow me to say that there are a number of considerate men in this world. And I'll leave it at that.

-Teresa

Haha I hope I don't meet them. Not that I have issus with gays, but that would be awkard for sure.
I just meant that sexually, most men don't really give a women exactly what SHE needs. Sex tends to mostly focus on the male needs and women tend to get left behind, which is unfair. If you are with someone, it should be just as important they get as much enjoyment out of sex as the male does.

Do you have a source for proving any of this? I know that I for one would want the girl to feel the most pleasure.

 

[SofiasMami]

I'm curious, are you a feminist, ardour? A fair question since some men are...
Anyway, if you're not, please be careful about speaking for feminists. I fit into those slots mentioned in your post below but your statements on what people like me believe about sexual relations are ill-informed..

As for the original question, I suppose if someone isn't getting their needs met in a relationship (whatever those needs are), it's up to them to speak up, no?

-Teresa

What society? I live in western Canada so...
I'm not sure I'm following...
quote]

Educated, middle class society (?) There's this attitude within feminism, spilling out into the culture, that 'normal' intercourse is unsatisfying and often demeaning for women, best replaced by other acts altogether.

 

[AmytheTemperamental]

Educated, middle class society (?) There's this attitude within feminism, spilling out into the culture, that 'normal' intercourse is unsatisfying and often demeaning for women, best replaced by other acts altogether.

I'm not sure I believe this falls under feminism. I think people in general look to get the most out of their relationships, including sexually. And the moment you slap the "normal" label on anything, it becomes less interesting. IMO anyways.

 

[Triple Bogey]

A question for the ladies.

I have only been out with 3 women in my life. On the first date all of them talked about their ex boyfriends / ex husbands / blokes they have known etc. The two I saw for more than one date continued to talk about men. It was probably the number one subject of conversation. I must admit I found it very boring and irritating. And none of the relationships lasted.

So my question is 'Was I unlucky meeting these women or is it normal behaviour ?

 

[TheRealCallie]

A question for the ladies.

I have only been out with 3 women in my life. On the first date all of them talked about their ex boyfriends / ex husbands / blokes they have known etc. The two I saw for more than one date continued to talk about men. It was probably the number one subject of conversation. I must admit I found it very boring and irritating. And none of the relationships lasted.

So my question is 'Was I unlucky meeting these women or is it normal behaviour ?

I'd say you were unlucky. Yeah, there are some women that do it, but if the girl honestly wants to have a good time with a guy, it's pretty much common sense to not talk about past relationships. (The same applies to men)

 

[Triple Bogey]

A question for the ladies.

I have only been out with 3 women in my life. On the first date all of them talked about their ex boyfriends / ex husbands / blokes they have known etc. The two I saw for more than one date continued to talk about men. It was probably the number one subject of conversation. I must admit I found it very boring and irritating. And none of the relationships lasted.

So my question is 'Was I unlucky meeting these women or is it normal behaviour ?

I'd say you were unlucky. Yeah, there are some women that do it, but if the girl honestly wants to have a good time with a guy, it's pretty much common sense to not talk about past relationships. (The same applies to men)

Cheers

 

[Paraiyar]

If a guy likes you, would you prefer that he tells you to your face rather than texting or telling you via Facebook or whatever? I really think it should be done in person.

 

[VanillaCreme]

If a guy likes you, would you prefer that he tells you to your face rather than texting or telling you via Facebook or whatever? I really think it should be done in person.

To me, it wouldn't matter. Talking is talking, as long as you get your feelings out.

 

[Solivagant]

Anyway, if you're not, please be careful about speaking for feminists. I fit into those slots mentioned in your post below but your statements on what people like me believe about sexual relations are ill-informed..

^ This.

If a guy likes you, would you prefer that he tells you to your face rather than texting or telling you via Facebook or whatever? I really think it should be done in person.

To me, it wouldn't matter. Talking is talking, as long as you get your feelings out.

^ It wouldn't matter to me either.

 

[JHK]

What society? I live in western Canada so...
I'm not sure I'm following...

Educated, middle class society (?) There's this attitude within feminism, spilling out into the culture, that 'normal' intercourse is unsatisfying and often demeaning for women, best replaced by other acts altogether.

I just meant that most men only have selfish needs when it comes to sex. As long as they get off it is all good. That's all.

 

[SofiasMami]

A question for the ladies.

I have only been out with 3 women in my life. On the first date all of them talked about their ex boyfriends / ex husbands / blokes they have known etc. The two I saw for more than one date continued to talk about men. It was probably the number one subject of conversation. I must admit I found it very boring and irritating. And none of the relationships lasted.

So my question is 'Was I unlucky meeting these women or is it normal behaviour ?

I can't speak for other women but for me talk about past relationships and exes is off-limits when I first meet someone. How is a guy going to feel special if all I'm talking about is other men? That said, I've met a number of men who have talked about their exes on a first or second date. So I think it's fairly common behavior, unfortunately!

---

If a guy likes you, would you prefer that he tells you to your face rather than texting or telling you via Facebook or whatever? I really think it should be done in person.

I think it's ok to use the written word to tell someone you like them. In the old days, people used to put pen to paper and write love letters. So writing it digitally is also fine, in my opinion. If you're feeling enthusiastic about someone, why let the moment pass until you see them face to face? Fire off that text or Facebook message

-Teresa

 

[ladyforsaken]

If a guy likes you, would you prefer that he tells you to your face rather than texting or telling you via Facebook or whatever? I really think it should be done in person.

It doesn't matter to me either.

 

[Paraiyar]

What society? I live in western Canada so...
I'm not sure I'm following...

Educated, middle class society (?) There's this attitude within feminism, spilling out into the culture, that 'normal' intercourse is unsatisfying and often demeaning for women, best replaced by other acts altogether.

I just meant that most men only have selfish needs when it comes to sex. As long as they get off it is all good. That's all.

Again, do you have any source or anything proving this?

 

[JHK]

What society? I live in western Canada so...
I'm not sure I'm following...

Educated, middle class society (?) There's this attitude within feminism, spilling out into the culture, that 'normal' intercourse is unsatisfying and often demeaning for women, best replaced by other acts altogether.

I just meant that most men only have selfish needs when it comes to sex. As long as they get off it is all good. That's all.

Again, do you have any source or anything proving this?

Physical proof? No. I prefer women to orgasim first. Or twice. Call it pride - I like girls to be satisfied.
My only "evidence" is that 95% of women I talk to say they don't, or fake, orgasims.
I made a broad general statement that men usually use sex for themselves. I'm not even sure how we got onto this sex is demeaning for women and needing proof.
What is it you think I am trying to say that you disagree with??

---

A question for the ladies.

I have only been out with 3 women in my life. On the first date all of them talked about their ex boyfriends / ex husbands / blokes they have known etc. The two I saw for more than one date continued to talk about men. It was probably the number one subject of conversation. I must admit I found it very boring and irritating. And none of the relationships lasted.

So my question is 'Was I unlucky meeting these women or is it normal behaviour ?

I'd say you were unlucky. Yeah, there are some women that do it, but if the girl honestly wants to have a good time with a guy, it's pretty much common sense to not talk about past relationships. (The same applies to men)

Why is it common sense to not talk about past relationships?
I genuinely don't get it. We all know there is someone before us - why try to pretend they didn't happen? Is it a jealousy thing?
The only massive red flag for me would be if they constantly slammed the other person every chance they got, more so if a child is involved. At one point, you obviously cared but if all you can talk about it putting them down, to me, that says a lot about someone's character.
I BELIEVE (no proof) most relationships end because people change - who we were five years ago when we hit it off isn't who I am now so we aren't as compatiable - the anger comes in losing comfort - but is that right or wrong? Unless you are one of those heartless dicks that just cheat becauee you can....
But we know people came before us - I don't get why it is such a big deal to talk about it.
And please keep in mind - I'm not trying to be an ass. I haven't been in a serious long term relationship and I really just don't this issue. It seems so juvenile.