Finally
I have said a great deal about negativity, how it is something that you should try and avoid in yourself. But it can be difficult to maintain when you are first trying to change. If you were trying to give up smoking you would avoid situations where people are smoking, at least in the beginning. Same with alcohol and drugs. A diet - don't go into a chocolate/cake/fastfood outlet.
When you avoiding negativity in yourself, you would be well advised to avoid negative people, as well. If you have a circle of friends who spend all or most of their time complaining about pretty much everything from the the price of gas to their husband, girlfriend, their football team, government - anything really, it is after a while, a downer that will bring you down with it. Now a bit of a moan now and again is OK, we all need a vent from time to time and that is OK. But if there is a lot of negativity going on, you need to take a bit of distance from it.
Even worse are those people who are bitter or jealous. The kind of people who are always amused at other peoples' misfortune, and prefer to tear down and attack rather than help or build. Such people will, if you succeed in finding what you want, be it a relationship, new job, friend or whatever, do their best to poison it for you. Why? Some people only feel good about themselves when they are trashing somebody else. It is in fact very sad that they have to be like this, but be aware that any success you have will make them start attacking you, either to your face or behind your back. The best way not to let them get to you, is to avoid them.
Think hard about your circle of friends, and what you talk about when you are with them. If any of what I have said rings true, you would be better off seeing a lot less of them. In some cases you might want to never see them again. Harsh? Maybe. But you cannot change other people, only yourself. And you might suddenly find one day that you are noticing how some of your companions are no longer people you want to be with, that you would prefer to be around people who mostly generate happiness and positivity, not the opposite.
Tip 9 Look at the company you keep. If it is dominated by negative, bitter or permanently angry people, avoid them. If it isn't you already, it will be in a few years time.
Final Tip. My dog is a rescue animal. When he came to live at my expense he was a pathetic waif who had never had a good dinner, much less, I think, a bone. The first time I gave him a nice, raw beef shin bone in the garden, his little face lit up and he immediately tried to bring it into through the back door, into the house to gnaw it in comfort on the best rug. I wouldn't let him. I took him back outside, gave it back to him. He tried again. We did this about three or four times, then he stood still a minute, and suddenly went off around the house. There he stood at the front door, trying to get me to let him in there with it. I think that was quite smart for a little dog. What he did wasn't working, so - he tried a different approach, quite literally.
How many of you are wanting something - anything - and trying the same thing over and over, despite the fact that it isn't working? Are you less smart than a mongrel dog? Admittedly even that didn't work for him, he still isn't allowed a bone in the house. But my goodness, he gave it a good try. Respect, Trojie! And I did get him some special chewy treats that he can eat in the house, so he didn't do too badly.
I have given you all kinds of tips and advice, take it, don't take it. It's up to you. But for god's sake, if you have been trying over and over and getting nowhere, then find some other options and give them a go.
Tip 10 If what you are doing isn't working, try ANYTHING different.
Because as the saying goes, if you always do what you have always done, you will always get what you have always got.
Is that what you want?
Really?
