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You just reminded me of something, way back when people still brought hard copies of music and movies I worked at Virgin Megastores.
There was a hairdressers opposite and a really cute girl that worked there. Every morning when I saw her I'd say morning and give her a wink.

One morning one of my colleagues decided he'd do the same, the girl came into our store at lunchtime and complained to our manager that my colleague was sexually harassing her. 🤷‍♂️

You worked at one of those??
There was only one of those here years ago and they closed it down.
That place was huge, I miss it. Was one of two places I could go to find imports.
 
You just reminded me of something, way back when people still brought hard copies of music and movies I worked at Virgin Megastores.
There was a hairdressers opposite and a really cute girl that worked there. Every morning when I saw her I'd say morning and give her a wink.

One morning one of my colleagues decided he'd do the same, the girl came into our store at lunchtime and complained to our manager that my colleague was sexually harassing her. 🤷‍♂️

Honestly some women are jokers and their jokes are not funny, but also men have a problem thinking just because I let one man do something it means they all can, dont work that way sadly.
 
Honestly some women are jokers and their jokes are not funny, but also men have a problem thinking just because I let one man do something it means they all can, dont work that way sadly.

That's definitely true. I can't objectify a woman unless I have her permission to. For two reasons. 1.) I don't want to fresia that up, and 2.) I actually like genuinely knowing my interests as people. It would take the personable part out of it which would kind of defeat the purpose to me. 🤷‍♂️ I can't do the nameless body thing. Not with love and sex, at least. Plus, there's no way for me to tell if I'm wasting my time on some girl who's fronting bullshit or not unless I actually take the time to get to know her. A lot of dudes in the hookup culture world totally miss that part, and the result is that they hook up with a girl and have great chemistry, and then that honeysuckle lasts less than a year because the physical chemistry is great but the mental chemistry is all wrong. The thing about investing time is, that once you spend your time it's just gone. You can go and get more money, but you can't really go and get more time. And I absolutely hate finding out I've wasted my time, and I'm sure women do too. Nobody likes that honeysuckle.
 
That's definitely true. I can't objectify a woman unless I have her permission to. For two reasons. 1.) I don't want to fresia that up, and 2.) I actually like genuinely knowing my interests as people. It would take the personable part out of it which would kind of defeat the purpose to me. 🤷‍♂️ I can't do the nameless body thing. Not with love and sex, at least. Plus, there's no way for me to tell if I'm wasting my time on some girl who's fronting bullshit or not unless I actually take the time to get to know her. A lot of dudes in the hookup culture world totally miss that part, and the result is that they hook up with a girl and have great chemistry, and then that honeysuckle lasts less than a year because the physical chemistry is great but the mental chemistry is all wrong. The thing about investing time is, that once you spend your time it's just gone. You can go and get more money, but you can't really go and get more time. And I absolutely hate finding out I've wasted my time, and I'm sure women do too. Nobody likes that honeysuckle.
I used to know this guy, he would always comment on my body, was cheeky and funny to me when he did it however, because he did it, other guys started to who... just didn't get my dry humour, so instead it made me feel uncomfortable and sometimes offended. I have never reported them for harassment, I simply told the guy who started it to tell them to stop and he did, so luckily that worked out for me, and I felt kinda stupid when he started apologising for doing it to because he did nothing wrong in my eyes.

But sorry me and my hijacking ways, back to average men, maybe drop your standards or go abroad where your currency and foreign charm can get you a longer way...
 
I used to know this guy, he would always comment on my body, was cheeky and funny to me when he did it however, because he did it, other guys started to who... just didn't get my dry humour, so instead it made me feel uncomfortable and sometimes offended. I have never reported them for harassment, I simply told the guy who started it to tell them to stop and he did, so luckily that worked out for me, and I felt kinda stupid when he started apologising for doing it to because he did nothing wrong in my eyes.

But sorry me and my hijacking ways, back to average men, maybe drop your standards or go abroad where your currency and foreign charm can get you a longer way...
Attractive guy does it = "cheeky and funny"

But seriously no-one should be doing it. Standards apply across the board or else they mean nothing,
 
I used to know this guy, he would always comment on my body, was cheeky and funny to me when he did it however, because he did it, other guys started to who... just didn't get my dry humour, so instead it made me feel uncomfortable and sometimes offended. I have never reported them for harassment, I simply told the guy who started it to tell them to stop and he did, so luckily that worked out for me, and I felt kinda stupid when he started apologising for doing it to because he did nothing wrong in my eyes.

But sorry me and my hijacking ways, back to average men, maybe drop your standards or go abroad where your currency and foreign charm can get you a longer way...
That's exactly what I'm looking for; a broad.
😈
 
I used to know this guy, he would always comment on my body, was cheeky and funny to me when he did it however, because he did it, other guys started to who... just didn't get my dry humour, so instead it made me feel uncomfortable and sometimes offended. I have never reported them for harassment, I simply told the guy who started it to tell them to stop and he did, so luckily that worked out for me, and I felt kinda stupid when he started apologising for doing it to because he did nothing wrong in my eyes.

But sorry me and my hijacking ways, back to average men, maybe drop your standards or go abroad where your currency and foreign charm can get you a longer way...

I'm sorry that happened to you. That sounds both embarrassing and confusing. Embarrassing for you, because that's not how you wanted things to go, and confusing for the other guys, who didn't understand why it's only okay if that guy does it.

I don't really have standards. I'm not in the dating puddle, lol.
But from an outside perspective, it looks a lot like these two clips from South Park:



 
I will honest about something... there are not many women in the world who would admit this...but some of us won't say yes, even if we want to because we want to be chased more..
I've had many admit it to me. And, IMO, there's nothing wrong with wanting to be chased. It makes you feel good. If a guy gives up at step 1 that sends a message to the woman that she's not worth the effort. But, if the guy keeps getting the honeysuckle kick out of him and he keeps coming back it sends a message to the woman that she's very valuable.

ALSO, if a guy gets a women too easily then she must not be valuable AKA slut. So, it's a complicated GAME. For most the older you get the less you want to play it.
 
Meh. Any women that complains when a guy - is just being friendly and winking at them at them - somehow now deems that as "harassment" is a sorry sad sack of a propagandized individual.

Just another way for the TPTB to create division between the sexes ..Turn off the idiot box and retrieve a mind of your own, please.
 
ALSO, if a guy gets a women too easily then she must not be valuable AKA slut. .
And if a man keeps pursuing in the face of indifference then that communicates he's not valuable; that his time isn't valuable to him, that he has no other options or self-respect. There's no winning at these games.
 
And if a man keeps pursuing in the face of indifference then that communicates he's not valuable; that his time isn't valuable to him, that he has no other options or self-respect. There's no winning at these games.
Absolutely! And that brings us back full circle to what cuts through all the BS games. A good looking person. If you are not good looking or ugly then you have to play even more games to the point of manipulation in order to maybe win. Too much effort. Too many negative or indifferent response to take in. Like you've said before it kills the confidence that you might of had before playing the games.
 
Too many negative or indifferent response to take in. Like you've said before it kills the confidence that you might of had before playing the games.
That’s the part women who share this attitude don't want to understand.

It’s would be a soul destroying, confidence sapping experience to have to go through this dozens of times over with women who it turns out really aren’t play-acting coy or changed their minds.
 
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Being a man is a paradox, is the thing.
Women are also paradoxes, just that society is a little bit more used to hearing that.
The paradox that is a woman is hypergamy and the adherence to the world of men.
Society is less used to hearing about the paradox that is a man, largely in part because there is a certain societal functional need within men that isn't in women that isn't really replaceable without advanced technology, which is why there is such a push for AGI (Advanced General Intelligence), to alleviate some of the labors of the work force that is put on men by outsourcing that labor to complex advanced machinery. It's creepy, yes, but that's its functional purpose.
Of course the Forever Alone Man is going to have his sex robot, but that's really not the point of AGI Development, that's just predatory marketing tactics that prey on the Forever Alone Man so that they can take his money to continue funding the more societal functional purpose of it.
The paradox that is a man, is that we are bred and raised for societal sacrifice and societal providence, that's why we're socially conditioned to labors of responsibility in our childhood.
Which means that we are humans, with feelings, that are not taught how to navigate our feelings, and are instead taught that our feelings are not as important as what we must go and do in life or that our feelings are not as important as what we sacrifice ourselves for.
And I think the reason why it gets swept under the rug a lot, is that a lot of good and honest men die on the job from accidents, or they fresia their lives up, go to prison, are outcasted even in prison from other men and become the prison punching bag and literally get beaten to death in their cell.
So that the social model of desensitizing men and training them to be this providential, sacrificial thing, as inhumane as it is, has over time become what's basically normal and totally streamlined to a level of mass production, very similarly in parallel actually to the sexual objectification of women.
If women have sons, that's why they raise their sons the way that they do.
If men have sons, that's why they raise their sons the way that they do.
The only difference really, between being a death row inmate and your regular 9-5, Monday - Friday job, is that death row inmates are treated differently, that's a different stock to the government, which is why the prison Industry is called the Prison INDUSTRY.
A free man is also on death row, because he kind of has nothing to look forward to in life, since life is entirely about what we can do and what we can give up.
On death row, you're eventually executed. In the free world, you eventually expire.
We're not taught compassion and love, it's more of a fantasy that doesn't really exist to us.
THAT's the paradox that is a man:
We're loved after we've sacrificed ourselves, after we've been emotionally exhausted into a blank canvas where love has lost its meaning entirely.

This is pretty much how the world we live in was built over the course of the last 2,000 - 6,000 years. During the construction of Angkor Wat in Cambodia, when the men who were slaves could no longer lift the stones to build the building, they were killed, and their bodies were used as mortar inside the walls. The remains have been found as the walls have deteriorated over time. In modernity, when a man goes and serves in the military and goes to war to fight for his country, he comes back to America, and when he is too old and has too many health problems to be of military use, he is forced back into the workforce, as your neighborhood Wal-Mart greeter. Really not all that different if you think about it. Slaves that built the pyramids and slaves from the levant to Mesopotamia were all paid in water and grains, which is how beer was accidentally discovered and became an ancient libation (or holy drink).

If there's any truth to the repetitious cycles of history I think things will eventually smooth out, just perhaps not in my lifetime. Or at least not until I'm too old to care anymore. I don't know, I already kind of don't really care, I guess that's why it's easy for me to see things this way, because I'm emotionally removed from the innate longing for emotional connectivity.

Anyway, historically speaking, monogamy as a social construct came as a delegation. Just as did the eventual collapse of the harem and why royal polygamy all fell out of practice: Too many women mated with too many "high value men," or the sultans, kings, etc. and all of the children in higher numbers conspired to kill each other for power. So to reduce the complication of that, those practices fell out.

And the reason why I think that will make a return, is that even wealthy men, don't like the idea of multiple children, except for Elon Musk, who is of the Quiver Full mentality, which is purely a religious thing, and well simply put: Not everybody has the resources that Musk has, and in conjunction, most Quiver Full families are incredibly dysfunctional, often with absentee parents who eventually become universally-understood problems to their children as they progress into adulthood (like that one crazy dude who has like 40 kids). Plus on a financial level, just because you *can* have a bunch of billion dollar or million dollar kids, doesn't necessarily mean that you should. That's the thing about money and math, division is still division regardless of what color the division symbol is painted or drawn with. 😂

Anyway, enough of my silly rambling in this thread. Time to go silly rambling in another thread.
 
Being a man is a paradox, is the thing.
Women are also paradoxes, just that society is a little bit more used to hearing that.
The paradox that is a woman is hypergamy and the adherence to the world of men.
Society is less used to hearing about the paradox that is a man, largely in part because there is a certain societal functional need within men that isn't in women that isn't really replaceable without advanced technology, which is why there is such a push for AGI (Advanced General Intelligence), to alleviate some of the labors of the work force that is put on men by outsourcing that labor to complex advanced machinery. It's creepy, yes, but that's its functional purpose.
Of course the Forever Alone Man is going to have his sex robot, but that's really not the point of AGI Development, that's just predatory marketing tactics that prey on the Forever Alone Man so that they can take his money to continue funding the more societal functional purpose of it.
The paradox that is a man, is that we are bred and raised for societal sacrifice and societal providence, that's why we're socially conditioned to labors of responsibility in our childhood.
Which means that we are humans, with feelings, that are not taught how to navigate our feelings, and are instead taught that our feelings are not as important as what we must go and do in life or that our feelings are not as important as what we sacrifice ourselves for.
And I think the reason why it gets swept under the rug a lot, is that a lot of good and honest men die on the job from accidents, or they fresia their lives up, go to prison, are outcasted even in prison from other men and become the prison punching bag and literally get beaten to death in their cell.
So that the social model of desensitizing men and training them to be this providential, sacrificial thing, as inhumane as it is, has over time become what's basically normal and totally streamlined to a level of mass production, very similarly in parallel actually to the sexual objectification of women.
If women have sons, that's why they raise their sons the way that they do.
If men have sons, that's why they raise their sons the way that they do.
The only difference really, between being a death row inmate and your regular 9-5, Monday - Friday job, is that death row inmates are treated differently, that's a different stock to the government, which is why the prison Industry is called the Prison INDUSTRY.
A free man is also on death row, because he kind of has nothing to look forward to in life, since life is entirely about what we can do and what we can give up.
On death row, you're eventually executed. In the free world, you eventually expire.
We're not taught compassion and love, it's more of a fantasy that doesn't really exist to us.
THAT's the paradox that is a man:
We're loved after we've sacrificed ourselves, after we've been emotionally exhausted into a blank canvas where love has lost its meaning entirely.

This is pretty much how the world we live in was built over the course of the last 2,000 - 6,000 years. During the construction of Angkor Wat in Cambodia, when the men who were slaves could no longer lift the stones to build the building, they were killed, and their bodies were used as mortar inside the walls. The remains have been found as the walls have deteriorated over time. In modernity, when a man goes and serves in the military and goes to war to fight for his country, he comes back to America, and when he is too old and has too many health problems to be of military use, he is forced back into the workforce, as your neighborhood Wal-Mart greeter. Really not all that different if you think about it. Slaves that built the pyramids and slaves from the levant to Mesopotamia were all paid in water and grains, which is how beer was accidentally discovered and became an ancient libation (or holy drink).

If there's any truth to the repetitious cycles of history I think things will eventually smooth out, just perhaps not in my lifetime. Or at least not until I'm too old to care anymore. I don't know, I already kind of don't really care, I guess that's why it's easy for me to see things this way, because I'm emotionally removed from the innate longing for emotional connectivity.

Anyway, historically speaking, monogamy as a social construct came as a delegation. Just as did the eventual collapse of the harem and why royal polygamy all fell out of practice: Too many women mated with too many "high value men," or the sultans, kings, etc. and all of the children in higher numbers conspired to kill each other for power. So to reduce the complication of that, those practices fell out.

And the reason why I think that will make a return, is that even wealthy men, don't like the idea of multiple children, except for Elon Musk, who is of the Quiver Full mentality, which is purely a religious thing, and well simply put: Not everybody has the resources that Musk has, and in conjunction, most Quiver Full families are incredibly dysfunctional, often with absentee parents who eventually become universally-understood problems to their children as they progress into adulthood (like that one crazy dude who has like 40 kids). Plus on a financial level, just because you *can* have a bunch of billion dollar or million dollar kids, doesn't necessarily mean that you should. That's the thing about money and math, division is still division regardless of what color the division symbol is painted or drawn with. 😂

Anyway, enough of my silly rambling in this thread. Time to go silly rambling in another thread.
This is so interesting to me, I was thinking a little more about men... and how they "used" to be. Watching old movies of them putting their coats over puddles so their ladies feet won't get wet. I'm sure I could find a handful of men that would do that for me, but not many. Honestly, theres still a conditioned part of me that rolls my eyes when people talk about men having "feelings", my brother hates that about me, he is like "we do have feelings you knowww" lol but I just hate seeing men as equal to me, the same as me, as emotional as me, makes me just... angry... like I've been sold a lie, like they aren't magic, like I'm gonna have to learn how to be strong because I have no one to lean on, like I will have to shoulder this horrid world, I have no man to protect me. The men that protected me are dead (RIP Dads), and the rest are just emotional and don't even wanna protect me if they could. It's like a hard pill to swallow. Am I not a princess in the tower waiting for her brave prince? Why was I sold this lieee. I have to get myself out the bloody tower and then sleep with him and after we cry together and talk about our feelings... wtf... Mini rant over.
 
This is so interesting to me, I was thinking a little more about men... and how they "used" to be. Watching old movies of them putting their coats over puddles so their ladies feet won't get wet. I'm sure I could find a handful of men that would do that for me, but not many. Honestly, theres still a conditioned part of me that rolls my eyes when people talk about men having "feelings", my brother hates that about me, he is like "we do have feelings you knowww" lol but I just hate seeing men as equal to me, the same as me, as emotional as me, makes me just... angry... like I've been sold a lie, like they aren't magic, like I'm gonna have to learn how to be strong because I have no one to lean on, like I will have to shoulder this horrid world, I have no man to protect me. The men that protected me are dead (RIP Dads), and the rest are just emotional and don't even wanna protect me if they could. It's like a hard pill to swallow. Am I not a princess in the tower waiting for her brave prince? Why was I sold this lieee. I have to get myself out the bloody tower and then sleep with him and after we cry together and talk about our feelings... wtf... Mini rant over.

You were sold that lie for the exact same reason that men were sold the lie of the devoutly loyal housewife that can do no wrong except for the potential awkwardness of old 1950's home remedies to common childhood accidents. Kid's got a fever, no ice pack? No problem, frozen green peas is the new ice bag. 😂

That's Social Constructionism 101 for you.
Men and women were both lied to in order to keep us from going extinct as a species.
Which again, made sense thousands of years ago, not so much now though in a world where there's 8,000,000,000 Humans where hundreds of drones with video cameras are flying around city grids, 1,000 - 3,000 Satellites in Space, and everyone's got a camera in their pocket JUST IN CASE.

Congratulations to Humans, who have successfully solved our Extinction Problem by exchanging it for our more socially constructed Not Wanting To Continue To Be Alive Because It's All Fake Problem.
 
This is so interesting to me, I was thinking a little more about men... and how they "used" to be. Watching old movies of them putting their coats over puddles so their ladies feet won't get wet. I'm sure I could find a handful of men that would do that for me, but not many. Honestly, theres still a conditioned part of me that rolls my eyes when people talk about men having "feelings", my brother hates that about me, he is like "we do have feelings you knowww" lol but I just hate seeing men as equal to me, the same as me, as emotional as me, makes me just... angry... like I've been sold a lie, like they aren't magic, like I'm gonna have to learn how to be strong because I have no one to lean on, like I will have to shoulder this horrid world, I have no man to protect me. The men that protected me are dead (RIP Dads), and the rest are just emotional and don't even wanna protect me if they could. It's like a hard pill to swallow. Am I not a princess in the tower waiting for her brave prince? Why was I sold this lieee. I have to get myself out the bloody tower and then sleep with him and after we cry together and talk about our feelings... wtf... Mini rant over.
You’ve ( that's a general you not a you in particular Princess ) bought into the idea that quality relationships take place while floating in the clouds among the rainbows and the unicorns.

Healthy relationships may sometimes be hard, but they’re not all that complicated. It’s a fundamental distinction that is easy to miss. Hard implies the necessity of effort, which positive and sustainable relationships unquestionably require, but “complicated” essentially means that the relationship is difficult to understand. That’s another notion entirely.

You don’t need to fix everything that’s wrong, but you do need to be able to tolerate and manage conflict. A relationship in which you say to yourself, “I love this person so much I can’t think of anyone I’d rather have a conflict with.”

I put phrases like, “soulmate” and “meant to be” in a category I call things that sound loving but are actually f***ing dumb.

The linguistic choices used to describe love do matter, and using words like “soulmate,” “meant to be” and “destiny” indicates a belief structure which is inherently flawed.

Thinking this way reveals that you’ve bought into the lie that relationships are about you. They exist to serve us, submit to us and make us happy at all costs; anything less is unjust and unfair, a failure not worth pursuing. As a result, many run for the hills the moment they encounter tension or discomfort.

Whether you’re married, engaged, in a relationship or want to be in a relationship one day, you must accept this fact:
A relationship is made up of two imperfect, fallible selfish human beings. You’ll hurt each other and let each other down often. There will be beautiful moments, the best of your life, but there will also be hard times.

And that's the REALITY!
 
This is so interesting to me, I was thinking a little more about men... and how they "used" to be. Watching old movies of them putting their coats over puddles so their ladies feet won't get wet. I'm sure I could find a handful of men that would do that for me, but not many. Honestly, theres still a conditioned part of me that rolls my eyes when people talk about men having "feelings", my brother hates that about me, he is like "we do have feelings you knowww" lol but I just hate seeing men as equal to me, the same as me, as emotional as me, makes me just... angry... like I've been sold a lie, like they aren't magic, like I'm gonna have to learn how to be strong because I have no one to lean on, like I will have to shoulder this horrid world, I have no man to protect me. The men that protected me are dead (RIP Dads), and the rest are just emotional and don't even wanna protect me if they could. It's like a hard pill to swallow. Am I not a princess in the tower waiting for her brave prince? Why was I sold this lieee. I have to get myself out the bloody tower and then sleep with him and after we cry together and talk about our feelings... wtf... Mini rant over.
 
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So, I can only speak from my experiences and the things I teach my son. First, you always hold the door, open the door, walk beside not in front or behind, in a crowd grab a hand or put hand on the back. I was not taught this but this is how I have always been treated at all ages. Yes, I can do those things for myself but for me its a show of respect and support. Do I expect all men to do this, hell no. Why would they unless they are taught that or believe they should. Then there's the crazy women like Ashley Judd who gets her panties in a bunch because a man did what?... I don't know, it was something silly though.
Ok, feelings. Of course men have feelings. Ive been tied up and locked in an apartment daily for months because of a mans feelings, granted not healthy feelings but feelings nonetheless. I can say that in my experience the more artistic and creative the man the better he is at expressing his feelings. I have always encouraged my son to express his feelings no matter what. However, Ive also stressed the importance of not being mistaken for a push over or a sucker.
As far as strength, no person man or woman should ever depend on another person for strength...channel it, use it as support when needed but never depend on another person. That is every individual's personal responsibilty. A man can't save you from yourself.
Oh and making a man or anyone cry never feels good unless that was the objective. In that case tick yourself a point for achieving a goal.
Great points here. Especially about tapping into the artistic side as an outlet for expressing yourself more reasonably. I never looked at it in that light - but it is sound advice.
 
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